I feel like I've been a drill-sargeant naggy mommy lately, and I hate it. Not even sure why; I've just been a crab. Came across this post during naps today and was encouraged. Lord, give me healing words of love and encouragement. Help me to seek out and remark on the good things and overlook the little irritants.
Mother Love is Hard to Explain
By Daring Young Mom on Wednesday, April 22,
Last night I found myself trying to explain to a 15-year-old girl, who has “issues” with her own mother and doesn’t plan on ever having kids of her own, how I feel about my own kids. I’m not sure how the conversation got to this place. I’m sure she didn’t ask me, “Hey Kathryn, please pour out your heart’s deepest feelings to me about motherhood.” I just wanted to tell her. I started talking and it all came spilling out.
When I’m blogging or even talking about my kids, I often share their funny quirks or the difficulties and challenges that make motherhood a struggle. It’s fun to whine about the hardships and to share never-a-dull-moment anecdotes.
The real sweetness of being a mom sort of gets stuck in my guts sometimes. It comes out at night when I’m watching them sleep or in those moments when I stare at them in wonder and think, “How was I so blessed to have a hand in creating you, in growing you cell by cell and now experience by experience?”
I told my teen friend that the love I have for them is strange and hard to explain in words. For a while they were literally a part of my body like baby “Kip” is right now, inside me, tearing things up and sharing my blood, food and the air I breathe. Then suddenly these people came spilling out and *snip* their body was their own. They still need me in many ways but every minute they get a little more independent, a little more sure that there is a world beyond my reach, a world they will discover and I will never truly understand.
I love watching them grow but there’s a part of me that sneaks into their rooms each night and just wants to smoosh them and cuddle them so tightly that they somehow meld back into me and never go off to school or karate lessons again. And they have no idea how I feel. They won’t until they have kids of their own.
They have a blend of Dan’s face and mine. Because we made them. When they say or do something that one of us would say or do, it just furthers my sense of claim on them. They are mine. Isn’t it obvious? There’s something so primal and possessive about my motherly feelings. They stem from the deepest places and they show themselves in the quiet times, the times I have a chance to breathe and stop doing motherhood and just enjoy feeling and being it.
It’s the day-to-day fights over whether pants and shoes need to be worn in public places, whether we should wipe stray paint on our new school clothes or if throwing rocks at the walls in the living room is a good game that these feelings get buried and my inner nanny/drill sergeant takes over. Those are the fun stories to tell my friends, who sympathize with me and share war stories of their own.
I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve talked with my mom friends about the other feelings that are brewing, the love feelings that don’t really have a name. Maybe they’re too close, too personal to share casually over a hotdog at the mall. Maybe we don’t know how to talk about them. Maybe we can sense the same feelings in each other and we don’t need to put them into words. It’s enough to know they’re there.....
But my kids need to see this too! They need to see these feelings and this love for them lived out in front of them way more than they need to hear the nagging. Show me Father. Give me Your grace - Your love....
A Pet Update!
There has been quite the turnover of pets in the Booker household as of late! Lucky for us, our boys handle death and the setting free of things quite nicely. Otherwise, there'd be plenty a tear around here!
So, let's see.....
First we had the bait fish....."Fishy." He lasted for a couple of months. Not too bad for someone who knows nothing about fish and for a fishy who was destined to have a hook in his back but for lack of an extra bait trap he was pardoned. Anyhoo, he got the "Ick" so I'm told - which is brought about by stress, I guess. Well, when we changed Mr. Fishy's water a few days prior, Jesse caught the poor thing in his bare hands and gave it a squeeze or two. That was probably pretty stressful! So, after a proper fishy funeral we gave him a flush when he went belly up. And that was the end of Mr. Fishy.
We also had two froggies: "George" and "Georgia." Well, methinks George was the Alpha Frog and wouldn't let poor Georgia get any of the crickets that we put in the cage. Hence, poor Georgia keeled over while George stayed as wild as ever.
Here is when a "deal" came into the mix. We sent poor Georgia to her watery grave out in our backyard and gave George his freedom along with her. In exchange, we went to the pet store and came home with two Comet Goldfish. Their names: "Comet" and "Goldy." Classic.
On our way up to the County this week-end, we also caught four red bellied salamanders and tons of worms. We let the boys love on them for about four days, and once they got a little lethargic, we convinced kidlets to let them free in Grampy's backyard "to catch when we come up to visit again!" Smart, eh?
And today, Daddy and Kaden went on a day long fishing trip and came back with three little salamanders: two red backs and one pure red salamander that might be a newt. Not sure on that one. Kaden also brought home some sort of beetle for Sir Jester....but he might be dead already. Those pudgy fingers are none too gentle.
Oh, and we also have about a dozen crickets waiting to be lunch for any new frogs that we may find on our walks this week.
Good times. Good times.
**Update: As of this morning - Tuesday, April 28 - we are down one salamander. He's loose in the house. New rules have been established. No more carrying around our pets. Joy.
So, let's see.....
First we had the bait fish....."Fishy." He lasted for a couple of months. Not too bad for someone who knows nothing about fish and for a fishy who was destined to have a hook in his back but for lack of an extra bait trap he was pardoned. Anyhoo, he got the "Ick" so I'm told - which is brought about by stress, I guess. Well, when we changed Mr. Fishy's water a few days prior, Jesse caught the poor thing in his bare hands and gave it a squeeze or two. That was probably pretty stressful! So, after a proper fishy funeral we gave him a flush when he went belly up. And that was the end of Mr. Fishy.
We also had two froggies: "George" and "Georgia." Well, methinks George was the Alpha Frog and wouldn't let poor Georgia get any of the crickets that we put in the cage. Hence, poor Georgia keeled over while George stayed as wild as ever.
Here is when a "deal" came into the mix. We sent poor Georgia to her watery grave out in our backyard and gave George his freedom along with her. In exchange, we went to the pet store and came home with two Comet Goldfish. Their names: "Comet" and "Goldy." Classic.
On our way up to the County this week-end, we also caught four red bellied salamanders and tons of worms. We let the boys love on them for about four days, and once they got a little lethargic, we convinced kidlets to let them free in Grampy's backyard "to catch when we come up to visit again!" Smart, eh?
And today, Daddy and Kaden went on a day long fishing trip and came back with three little salamanders: two red backs and one pure red salamander that might be a newt. Not sure on that one. Kaden also brought home some sort of beetle for Sir Jester....but he might be dead already. Those pudgy fingers are none too gentle.
Oh, and we also have about a dozen crickets waiting to be lunch for any new frogs that we may find on our walks this week.
Good times. Good times.
**Update: As of this morning - Tuesday, April 28 - we are down one salamander. He's loose in the house. New rules have been established. No more carrying around our pets. Joy.
A Week-end in the County.....
.....and why it soothes my soul. Oooh, let me just count the ways!!!
:: A 2 hour drive north while kidlets sleep, coffee in hand, with nothing to look at but trees.
:: A pee pit stop at the Mt. Katahdin overlook...running up into the woods with Kaden and finding 4 salamanders and huge worms to entertain the boys for the rest of the trip.
:: Sleeping in every morning until 8:30 or 9:00 while the grandparents play with the kids.
:: LIVING outside in our wellies and getting sunburned and filthy.
:: Wading in the stream out back and floating wooden boats down it.
:: Four-wheeling for hours and stopping to fish at the river.
:: Bonfires and hotdog roasts.
:: Antiquing with Mom while the boys watch the kidlets.
:: Visiting with family in that slow, easy way.
:: People popping in for coffee, because that's just what you do!
:: Petting freshly hatched baby chicks.
:: Sitting outside in lawn chairs while listening to Hank Williams.
:: Remembering to just stop and truly savor life.
Ahhh, bliss!
:: A 2 hour drive north while kidlets sleep, coffee in hand, with nothing to look at but trees.
:: A pee pit stop at the Mt. Katahdin overlook...running up into the woods with Kaden and finding 4 salamanders and huge worms to entertain the boys for the rest of the trip.
:: Sleeping in every morning until 8:30 or 9:00 while the grandparents play with the kids.
:: LIVING outside in our wellies and getting sunburned and filthy.
:: Wading in the stream out back and floating wooden boats down it.
:: Four-wheeling for hours and stopping to fish at the river.
:: Bonfires and hotdog roasts.
:: Antiquing with Mom while the boys watch the kidlets.
:: Visiting with family in that slow, easy way.
:: People popping in for coffee, because that's just what you do!
:: Petting freshly hatched baby chicks.
:: Sitting outside in lawn chairs while listening to Hank Williams.
:: Remembering to just stop and truly savor life.
Ahhh, bliss!
I am In Love.....
And Sarah is my hero. No joke - I mean it. Although, I'm a little frustrated because your maternity pants rock, but they're all two inches too highwater for me!
As of today, I have solidified my choice of midwife practice and hospital for baby #3....and it turns out that all three kidlets will be born in different places with different people delivering them. That's okay, right?
Ever since we've moved home, I've been stressed out of my tree because I really really did not want to deliver this baby in the same hospital where I delivered Kaden. I know that this could be a completely different birth experience, and that no two deliveries would be alike, and I would have someone different deliver this baby, and I could maybe even possibly have a fantastic experience there etc. etc.
But, to be honest, I don't even want to entertain the thought. Kaden's birth was just way too traumatic for me. I get nauseaus just driving by that hospital and am having a hard time getting past that, so I've been praying and searching for an alternative route.
WELL!!!!
Really long story short - thanks to some legwork by Sarah - and some mass amounts of praying on Kev's and my part, the Lord has led us both to a hospital and a midwife practice that I am very much in love with. The hospital is a half hour drive away - it was a 45 minute drive for Jesse - so this is no big deal. It's very small, which I like. Each room is decorated differently and made to be very cozy. Each room has it's own shower, and whether I use it or not, I want the option without having to walk down the hall. There is a tub where I can both labor and deliver in if I so choose. And what sold me - hands down - is the nurse saying multiple times "We are known for letting the women write their own birth stories."
They are also very family friendly. There are no visiting hours - family and friends can come whenever I so choose. The recovery rooms don't just have a chair for Kev to spend the night in with me - he'll get his own bed. AND - sometime during our stay, after the baby's birth, we will be given a special meal to share together to celebrate our "accomplishment!"
They know how to "sit on their hands" and wait, they don't do anything just for routine purposes - no automatic I.V.'s, no external belly monitoring for extended periods of time, they don't even offer epidurals, and they are known for being patient, for listening to the moms, and for willing to wait things out. All VERY important things for me.
And today, I met the owner and founder of the midwife practice down the road and she completely sold me on the deal. I took her my records from both boys and she said that she is perfectly comfortable having me as a patient, AND if the same thing were to repeat itself she would not rush to induce like what happened with Kaden. She said she would watch me closely, but she is a huge proponent of waiting and letting the body take care of things when it's ready. She is right across the board with us on SO many things - she is a proponent of all things natural and homeopathic, she knew of all of the crazy supplements and things I was taking for Jesse and she approves and will even write prescriptions for them, there was absolutely no pressure on different tests, shots, and procedures, and she was just so so awesome.
Like I said, I'm in love. I am just so happy and so relieved and so thankful. Even if the end of my pregnancy goes ka-put I feel very confident and secure in our decision of who will take care of us, and Kev feels the same. Thank you, Jesus!
As of today, I have solidified my choice of midwife practice and hospital for baby #3....and it turns out that all three kidlets will be born in different places with different people delivering them. That's okay, right?
Ever since we've moved home, I've been stressed out of my tree because I really really did not want to deliver this baby in the same hospital where I delivered Kaden. I know that this could be a completely different birth experience, and that no two deliveries would be alike, and I would have someone different deliver this baby, and I could maybe even possibly have a fantastic experience there etc. etc.
But, to be honest, I don't even want to entertain the thought. Kaden's birth was just way too traumatic for me. I get nauseaus just driving by that hospital and am having a hard time getting past that, so I've been praying and searching for an alternative route.
WELL!!!!
Really long story short - thanks to some legwork by Sarah - and some mass amounts of praying on Kev's and my part, the Lord has led us both to a hospital and a midwife practice that I am very much in love with. The hospital is a half hour drive away - it was a 45 minute drive for Jesse - so this is no big deal. It's very small, which I like. Each room is decorated differently and made to be very cozy. Each room has it's own shower, and whether I use it or not, I want the option without having to walk down the hall. There is a tub where I can both labor and deliver in if I so choose. And what sold me - hands down - is the nurse saying multiple times "We are known for letting the women write their own birth stories."
They are also very family friendly. There are no visiting hours - family and friends can come whenever I so choose. The recovery rooms don't just have a chair for Kev to spend the night in with me - he'll get his own bed. AND - sometime during our stay, after the baby's birth, we will be given a special meal to share together to celebrate our "accomplishment!"
They know how to "sit on their hands" and wait, they don't do anything just for routine purposes - no automatic I.V.'s, no external belly monitoring for extended periods of time, they don't even offer epidurals, and they are known for being patient, for listening to the moms, and for willing to wait things out. All VERY important things for me.
And today, I met the owner and founder of the midwife practice down the road and she completely sold me on the deal. I took her my records from both boys and she said that she is perfectly comfortable having me as a patient, AND if the same thing were to repeat itself she would not rush to induce like what happened with Kaden. She said she would watch me closely, but she is a huge proponent of waiting and letting the body take care of things when it's ready. She is right across the board with us on SO many things - she is a proponent of all things natural and homeopathic, she knew of all of the crazy supplements and things I was taking for Jesse and she approves and will even write prescriptions for them, there was absolutely no pressure on different tests, shots, and procedures, and she was just so so awesome.
Like I said, I'm in love. I am just so happy and so relieved and so thankful. Even if the end of my pregnancy goes ka-put I feel very confident and secure in our decision of who will take care of us, and Kev feels the same. Thank you, Jesus!
Good Beginnings
Just want to write a little quicky on how I was awakened today.
The boys all clambered into bed with us and proceeded to have "boy club" talks on what we were going to do for an adventure today. Life has been spinning a little bit out of control lately, so we decided to take a break from it and go on an adventure. While they planned it and wrestled with Daddy - they know better than to do that with me first thing in the morning - I rolled back over tried to catch an extra couple of minutes.
Finally, they all snuck out to make some breakfast together, and I immediately fell back into a deep, deep slumber. And this is where it gets cute. I was awakened out of the deepest of sleeps by Kaden crawling up onto me and excitedly playing me "London Bridge" with his saxophone that he just taught himself, and by Jesse shoving a handful of pineapple pieces into my mouth and wiping his slimy little hands down my cheeks!
Now is that a way to wake up, or what? Music and breakfast in bed! It's like a five star resort around here!
The boys all clambered into bed with us and proceeded to have "boy club" talks on what we were going to do for an adventure today. Life has been spinning a little bit out of control lately, so we decided to take a break from it and go on an adventure. While they planned it and wrestled with Daddy - they know better than to do that with me first thing in the morning - I rolled back over tried to catch an extra couple of minutes.
Finally, they all snuck out to make some breakfast together, and I immediately fell back into a deep, deep slumber. And this is where it gets cute. I was awakened out of the deepest of sleeps by Kaden crawling up onto me and excitedly playing me "London Bridge" with his saxophone that he just taught himself, and by Jesse shoving a handful of pineapple pieces into my mouth and wiping his slimy little hands down my cheeks!
Now is that a way to wake up, or what? Music and breakfast in bed! It's like a five star resort around here!
Resurrection Rolls
This time of year it's always fun to do lots of Easter activities with the kids. Anything to help bring the lesson of Jesus' death and resurrection closer to home is good for me. And if it's tasty - well, that's just a bonus.
Try this easy sneezy recipe with your kidlets.
Resurrection Rolls Recipe
(each item represents how Jesus' body was prepared for burial)
Large Marshmallows
Melted Butter
Sugar/Cinnamon mixture
Can of Crescent Rolls
1. Open can of crescent rolls and separate into triangles. The rolls represent the linen wrapping used in covering the dead.
2. Dip and roll one marshmallow (representing Jesus' body) into melted butter The butter represents the oils used in anointing the dead body.
3. Roll the marshmallow in the sugar/cinnamon mixture. The mixture represents the spices used in burials.
4. Place the marshmallow in the center of the crescent triangle. Fold and pinch the edges tight. Put each crescent-wrapped marshmallow on a slightly greased cookie sheet.
5. Bake the rolls as directed on he package. The oven represents the tomb.
When cooked, the marshmallow melts leaving only the puffed crescent roll.
This demonstrates how Jesus rose from the dead. All that remained in the tomb were the linen wrappings.
These are surprisingly tasty. ENJOY!!!
Try this easy sneezy recipe with your kidlets.
Resurrection Rolls Recipe
(each item represents how Jesus' body was prepared for burial)
Large Marshmallows
Melted Butter
Sugar/Cinnamon mixture
Can of Crescent Rolls
1. Open can of crescent rolls and separate into triangles. The rolls represent the linen wrapping used in covering the dead.
2. Dip and roll one marshmallow (representing Jesus' body) into melted butter The butter represents the oils used in anointing the dead body.
3. Roll the marshmallow in the sugar/cinnamon mixture. The mixture represents the spices used in burials.
4. Place the marshmallow in the center of the crescent triangle. Fold and pinch the edges tight. Put each crescent-wrapped marshmallow on a slightly greased cookie sheet.
5. Bake the rolls as directed on he package. The oven represents the tomb.
When cooked, the marshmallow melts leaving only the puffed crescent roll.
This demonstrates how Jesus rose from the dead. All that remained in the tomb were the linen wrappings.
These are surprisingly tasty. ENJOY!!!
Boyz.......
In the past few weeks, my boys really seem to be coming into their, shall we say, "boyhood" much more than they ever have before. A certain wildness has begun to characterize them like never before. Suddenly more than ever, certain "noises" strike them as uncontrollably hilarious, they find it hysterical to strip down to their undies and diaper and streak through the house at top speeds, and the newest development in the Booker household is that of the "Boys Club" where no girls are allowed.....except for Mama if they so choose to give me the secret password!
A couple of nights ago, the family activity of choice was for the THREE of my boys to set traps in the kid's bedroom and see if they could get me when I walked in "unknowingly." Most of the traps were silly, and I totally saw them coming. But the one that sent Kev bent over backwards in hysterics was pulling a rope to have their basketball hoop fall on Mama's head....ahem...in my "delicate condition".....I didn't quite see the hilarity in this one! OH the joy.
Me thinks maybe - just maybe - a wee girly might reset the balance a bit.....
HOWEVER - I MUST say that the perks of being in a household of all boys is quite lovely in many ways. Kaden told me just a couple of days ago that one of his most favorite things to do in the day is to get in bed and snuggle with me first thing in the morning. How precious is that? And Jesse is very much into showing me his brute strength lately by randomly ALL throughout the day coming and giving me "stong huks!" - (Strong Hugs!) Melt my heart. Life is good.
I can handle the wildness, I guess.
A couple of nights ago, the family activity of choice was for the THREE of my boys to set traps in the kid's bedroom and see if they could get me when I walked in "unknowingly." Most of the traps were silly, and I totally saw them coming. But the one that sent Kev bent over backwards in hysterics was pulling a rope to have their basketball hoop fall on Mama's head....ahem...in my "delicate condition".....I didn't quite see the hilarity in this one! OH the joy.
Me thinks maybe - just maybe - a wee girly might reset the balance a bit.....
HOWEVER - I MUST say that the perks of being in a household of all boys is quite lovely in many ways. Kaden told me just a couple of days ago that one of his most favorite things to do in the day is to get in bed and snuggle with me first thing in the morning. How precious is that? And Jesse is very much into showing me his brute strength lately by randomly ALL throughout the day coming and giving me "stong huks!" - (Strong Hugs!) Melt my heart. Life is good.
I can handle the wildness, I guess.
It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!
For my boys and I at least.......
Tis the season for bugs and creepy crawlies! Whoo-hooo! We have been waiting, I tell you. And this day - as I type - we have not one, but FOUR treasures gracing my cupboard space. A strange sort of beetle that I have yet to discover the name. Her name is Georgia....but Kaden pulled one of her legs off by accident, and she kicked the bucket a couple of days ago. No tears shed though, for on our walk two days ago, we found a sweet little wooly bear caterpillar who now resides with dead Georgia.
And THEN!!! Last night on our way home from support raising, at around 9:00 at night with two very tired kidlets, Daddy joined in on the action and stopped the car in the middle of an old country road so that I could jump out and catch us two little froggies! Oh the excitement that abounded! We put them in an old coffee cup for the rest of the ride home and those frogs were nuts in there - they almost escaped through the hole twice. Once we got home to the lobby, one did escape and started hopping down the hallway! Friday night excitement, I tell you! So, now we have two little "WOGS!!!" as Jesse likes to scream at them: George and Georgia (in honor of Missy dead beetle).
Oh the joy! It's the first thing on their minds in the morning. While I was still in bed today, I heard them laughing hysterically because one got loose and was hopping all over the kitchen!
Now, we are watching and waiting for frogs' eggs and salamadars that will soon join our fun little stash of counter decor. And shortly after that there will be crayfish and more caterpillars to turn to moths and worms and bugs and - oh - maybe a baby kitten thrown in there too! Who knows!
I did say that we were embracing the chaos!
Come on over and meet the new family!
* * * * * *
(Man - if it's a girl, she'd better not be woosy........)
Tis the season for bugs and creepy crawlies! Whoo-hooo! We have been waiting, I tell you. And this day - as I type - we have not one, but FOUR treasures gracing my cupboard space. A strange sort of beetle that I have yet to discover the name. Her name is Georgia....but Kaden pulled one of her legs off by accident, and she kicked the bucket a couple of days ago. No tears shed though, for on our walk two days ago, we found a sweet little wooly bear caterpillar who now resides with dead Georgia.
And THEN!!! Last night on our way home from support raising, at around 9:00 at night with two very tired kidlets, Daddy joined in on the action and stopped the car in the middle of an old country road so that I could jump out and catch us two little froggies! Oh the excitement that abounded! We put them in an old coffee cup for the rest of the ride home and those frogs were nuts in there - they almost escaped through the hole twice. Once we got home to the lobby, one did escape and started hopping down the hallway! Friday night excitement, I tell you! So, now we have two little "WOGS!!!" as Jesse likes to scream at them: George and Georgia (in honor of Missy dead beetle).
Oh the joy! It's the first thing on their minds in the morning. While I was still in bed today, I heard them laughing hysterically because one got loose and was hopping all over the kitchen!
Now, we are watching and waiting for frogs' eggs and salamadars that will soon join our fun little stash of counter decor. And shortly after that there will be crayfish and more caterpillars to turn to moths and worms and bugs and - oh - maybe a baby kitten thrown in there too! Who knows!
I did say that we were embracing the chaos!
Come on over and meet the new family!
* * * * * *
(Man - if it's a girl, she'd better not be woosy........)
A Booker Kind of a Week-End
It's been a busy few days, so this week-end was a welcome respite.
I left my mostest fave down vest and car keys at the Bar Harbor Inn where I stayed when I went scrapbooking, so on Friday, we had a really great excuse to head to the ocean again. We lounged around the house all morning and then loaded into the car around the time I hoped Jesse would konk out for a snooze. We found a new, cheap, and super cool coffee shop in Ellsworth where we split some soup and bagels for lunch - delish - and then we headed onward.
It was such a gorgeous day at the ocean - really the first that we've had since we've been home. (The week-end that I went scrapbooking was beautiful, too, but I was too focused on my work to enjoy the weather). So, we just spent the whole rest of the afternoon walking along the trails and the shoreline collecting shells, throwing rocks into the water, searching for treasures, rolling down grassy hills, and just going along at the boy's pace.
It was lovely. I love this time of year where when we play outside I'm constantly reminded to slow down and to look at the world through their eyes. Jesse wants to collect every stick. Kaden wants to turn over every rock in hopes of a worm or a bug or a salamander, and there is just absolutely no rush whatsoever.
I love that.
We spent an awesome evening with friends on Saturday night enjoying delish food, guitar playing by the guys, and a little Wall-E with the kidlets. Good times.
And today is supposed to be the Mommy's Monday that I host each week. But, just about every Mommy was away for the week-end and feeling the need to be nesting in their own homes this morning. So, we are all cozied up inside our little abode right now, too. It's 11:00 and we're ALL still in our p.j.'s...well, actually the kids are running around like hoodlums in their undies. Daddy made eggs and homefries for breakfast. And we're just chillaxing.
Plans are being made for a nature walk and some grocery getting a bit later in the day....and it's aaaaallllll good.
Happy Monday!
I left my mostest fave down vest and car keys at the Bar Harbor Inn where I stayed when I went scrapbooking, so on Friday, we had a really great excuse to head to the ocean again. We lounged around the house all morning and then loaded into the car around the time I hoped Jesse would konk out for a snooze. We found a new, cheap, and super cool coffee shop in Ellsworth where we split some soup and bagels for lunch - delish - and then we headed onward.
It was such a gorgeous day at the ocean - really the first that we've had since we've been home. (The week-end that I went scrapbooking was beautiful, too, but I was too focused on my work to enjoy the weather). So, we just spent the whole rest of the afternoon walking along the trails and the shoreline collecting shells, throwing rocks into the water, searching for treasures, rolling down grassy hills, and just going along at the boy's pace.
It was lovely. I love this time of year where when we play outside I'm constantly reminded to slow down and to look at the world through their eyes. Jesse wants to collect every stick. Kaden wants to turn over every rock in hopes of a worm or a bug or a salamander, and there is just absolutely no rush whatsoever.
I love that.
We spent an awesome evening with friends on Saturday night enjoying delish food, guitar playing by the guys, and a little Wall-E with the kidlets. Good times.
And today is supposed to be the Mommy's Monday that I host each week. But, just about every Mommy was away for the week-end and feeling the need to be nesting in their own homes this morning. So, we are all cozied up inside our little abode right now, too. It's 11:00 and we're ALL still in our p.j.'s...well, actually the kids are running around like hoodlums in their undies. Daddy made eggs and homefries for breakfast. And we're just chillaxing.
Plans are being made for a nature walk and some grocery getting a bit later in the day....and it's aaaaallllll good.
Happy Monday!
news, News, NEWS!!!
Wait for it.
Wait for it.

Well, now! What in the world is this?????
We are pleased and proud to announce that we have another baby on the way!!!
How far along you ask? Well, he/she is about this big:

and is due right around October 11. My very first Fall baby. Hmmm. We shall see how we do through the winter months of feeling cagey with a baby - if they are anything like my other two - who screams all the blessed day long! I am praying for a happy one. Maybe I didn't pray hard enough for the other two! :0)
More to come later on our thoughts and ponderings, the boys' reactions - Jesse screamed "HI BABY!!!" at the sonogram machine during our visit. It was pretty cute! etc., etc. For now, we just wanted to share our news with the world.
Usually I wait a little longer - until about fifteen weeks or so. I'm only about eleven and a half now. But, Kev oh so graciously asked the other day: "Soooo. How long do you think you're going to be able to hide that paunch?!" Therefore, this time, we are sharing with the world a little early....I don't really have much choice! :0)
Suffice it to say - we are excited and happy. And we are psyching ourselves up to "embrace the chaos!" This is my new theme in life!
Wait for it.

Well, now! What in the world is this?????
We are pleased and proud to announce that we have another baby on the way!!!
How far along you ask? Well, he/she is about this big:

and is due right around October 11. My very first Fall baby. Hmmm. We shall see how we do through the winter months of feeling cagey with a baby - if they are anything like my other two - who screams all the blessed day long! I am praying for a happy one. Maybe I didn't pray hard enough for the other two! :0)
More to come later on our thoughts and ponderings, the boys' reactions - Jesse screamed "HI BABY!!!" at the sonogram machine during our visit. It was pretty cute! etc., etc. For now, we just wanted to share our news with the world.
Usually I wait a little longer - until about fifteen weeks or so. I'm only about eleven and a half now. But, Kev oh so graciously asked the other day: "Soooo. How long do you think you're going to be able to hide that paunch?!" Therefore, this time, we are sharing with the world a little early....I don't really have much choice! :0)
Suffice it to say - we are excited and happy. And we are psyching ourselves up to "embrace the chaos!" This is my new theme in life!
Tea for Twenty!
We had our very first Mother's Tea this morning, and for the first time of ever having done this sort of event, I think that it was a rousing success! Twenty Mommies were able to make it, there were no major glitches, and I think that overall the goal was accomplished of having them come and be refreshed and leave with a renewed sense of purpose that we are are doing as Moms is viewed in the Lord's eyes as something that is of utmost importance.

I know of at least ten who were not able to come because of child care - or lack thereof, at least three who had to work, and a few more who had sick kidlets at home, so I think with each time, this has potential to grow bigger and better.
I'm posting just a couple of pictures, but they really don't do justice to the cozy little atmosphere that we had with china teacups and saucers, candles, and individual teapots for each table. We had delish little finger foods, we played some silly games and gave away lots of fun prizes, and a sweet older Mama shared with us from her heart and had many of us in tears. So sweet.

We've learned a few things to make it better next time, we got some good ideas from the ladies of topics they would like to have covered in the future, and we're revving up for a summer event that will most likely take place on a Saturday so that hopefully there will be some Daddies out there who will be able to cover for a couple of hours so more Mommies can make it.
.....And next time the tea will stay hot. We promise.

I know of at least ten who were not able to come because of child care - or lack thereof, at least three who had to work, and a few more who had sick kidlets at home, so I think with each time, this has potential to grow bigger and better.
I'm posting just a couple of pictures, but they really don't do justice to the cozy little atmosphere that we had with china teacups and saucers, candles, and individual teapots for each table. We had delish little finger foods, we played some silly games and gave away lots of fun prizes, and a sweet older Mama shared with us from her heart and had many of us in tears. So sweet.

We've learned a few things to make it better next time, we got some good ideas from the ladies of topics they would like to have covered in the future, and we're revving up for a summer event that will most likely take place on a Saturday so that hopefully there will be some Daddies out there who will be able to cover for a couple of hours so more Mommies can make it.
.....And next time the tea will stay hot. We promise.
A Young Mother's Tea
I'm not really sure who even reads this blog....or who checks out my facebook page. BUT - just in case there might be someone who hasn't heard of this fun little event taking place on Wednesday morning, this post is for you!
A friend and I are hosting a wee get together for any young mom in the area - or out of the area, for that matter. Any mother who has young children is welcome to attend. We want you to come and just take a break with us and enjoy sweet fellowship and fun food with other moms. You spend all day every day serving the ones that you love most. Now is your chance to come and be served by US!!
Normally, I am ALL about bringing your kids with you - it's easier, it's more cost effective, AND it's a fun chance for them to all play together anyway. But for this one event, we are asking that you find someone to care for your children for those two hours - and we promise (we pray!) that it will be worth it!
We have a really fun atmosphere donated to us for the occasion, we'll be serving coffee and tea out of beautiful teacups and saucers, we'll have tons of fun finger foods, random prizes given away, and a "seasoned veteran mom" will share some encouragement and truth with us that what we are doing is important!!!
Mothering matters. It is the highest of callings - and it is so easy to forget and be discouraged amidst the season of diapers and sibling fights and the mundane same old same old. The entire goal of this little get together will be for moms to leave with their tanks completely filled up - physically, emotionally, and most importantly spiritually. II Timothy talks about the older women teaching the younger women. Maybe older moms feel that they have nothing of importance to share. Maybe some of us come across acting like we have all of the answers. Either way, God tells us that we need each other, and we don't do it enough. I think this will be a pretty fun way to live out some practical Scripture.
So if you can come and bring a friend - it'll be awesome! If you can't come, please pray for us. Pray that women are blessed, that some unsaved Mommies come and are exposed to the Lord and to a whole new community of women, and that, above all, Christ is honored and lifted up during these two hours.
Here are the stats:
When: Wednesday, March 25 - as in TWO DAYS!
Where: The Light House Christian Cafe - 453 Wilson St., Brewer
(Attached to Vacationland Village Inn)
Time: 9:00-11:00
A friend and I are hosting a wee get together for any young mom in the area - or out of the area, for that matter. Any mother who has young children is welcome to attend. We want you to come and just take a break with us and enjoy sweet fellowship and fun food with other moms. You spend all day every day serving the ones that you love most. Now is your chance to come and be served by US!!
Normally, I am ALL about bringing your kids with you - it's easier, it's more cost effective, AND it's a fun chance for them to all play together anyway. But for this one event, we are asking that you find someone to care for your children for those two hours - and we promise (we pray!) that it will be worth it!
We have a really fun atmosphere donated to us for the occasion, we'll be serving coffee and tea out of beautiful teacups and saucers, we'll have tons of fun finger foods, random prizes given away, and a "seasoned veteran mom" will share some encouragement and truth with us that what we are doing is important!!!
Mothering matters. It is the highest of callings - and it is so easy to forget and be discouraged amidst the season of diapers and sibling fights and the mundane same old same old. The entire goal of this little get together will be for moms to leave with their tanks completely filled up - physically, emotionally, and most importantly spiritually. II Timothy talks about the older women teaching the younger women. Maybe older moms feel that they have nothing of importance to share. Maybe some of us come across acting like we have all of the answers. Either way, God tells us that we need each other, and we don't do it enough. I think this will be a pretty fun way to live out some practical Scripture.
So if you can come and bring a friend - it'll be awesome! If you can't come, please pray for us. Pray that women are blessed, that some unsaved Mommies come and are exposed to the Lord and to a whole new community of women, and that, above all, Christ is honored and lifted up during these two hours.
Here are the stats:
When: Wednesday, March 25 - as in TWO DAYS!
Where: The Light House Christian Cafe - 453 Wilson St., Brewer
(Attached to Vacationland Village Inn)
Time: 9:00-11:00
Scrap-a-dee-doo-dah!
Just got back from a glorious week-end of scrapbooking in beautiful Bar Harbor with lovely friends. I am a "task oriented people person," so this week-end was just perfect for my little personality. I was able to accomplish something that has been hanging over my head for months - getting caught up on my albums - while enjoying sweet fellowship with some wonderful women.
Part of me feels like I was gone forever, and the other part of me feels like it was just a blip and now I'm back home and ready to step back into life again. This little hiatus was just the thing that I needed, and now I feel completely refreshed and rejuvenated. It has been almost two years since I have been away from all of my boy loves. Crazy.
They are all sleeping right now....but I cannot WAIT for them to wake up!
THIS is why I love little getaways once in awhile. They make me realize afresh and anew how truly full my life is and just how much love I have waiting back home for me. I am refueled and refreshed and ready to pour back into them again. Awesome.
And the amount of pages accomplished? No journaling, mind you - just the pictures with the borders, stickers, titles etc - but STILL!!!
101!!! That's right.
Part of me feels like I was gone forever, and the other part of me feels like it was just a blip and now I'm back home and ready to step back into life again. This little hiatus was just the thing that I needed, and now I feel completely refreshed and rejuvenated. It has been almost two years since I have been away from all of my boy loves. Crazy.
They are all sleeping right now....but I cannot WAIT for them to wake up!
THIS is why I love little getaways once in awhile. They make me realize afresh and anew how truly full my life is and just how much love I have waiting back home for me. I am refueled and refreshed and ready to pour back into them again. Awesome.
And the amount of pages accomplished? No journaling, mind you - just the pictures with the borders, stickers, titles etc - but STILL!!!
101!!! That's right.
Life
Wow....I'm really rotting at this whole posting thing lately.
Lots of little things happening lately. Mostly just life stuff. I'm finally starting to feel like I know what I'm doing at work. It's definitly not my LOVE sitting in an office by myself and working with numbers, paying bills etc. I actually find it quite funny that this is what I am getting paid to do, as I don't really have a sweet clue of the bills and money happenings in my own home! If Kev were to kick the bucket, I know where he keeps the file of "our life," but other than that - things wouldn't go south pretty fast!
Ah well. My work is only a few hours a week, it pays some bills, and I love the school. One couldn't ask for a nicer atmosphere to work in. This is the place where Kaden spent two days each week the first year of his life - in a little swing, exersaucer, or johnny jump up! The Lord knew that we needed to have Kaden first - Jesse would have lasted ten minutes in that tiny space before he would've freaked out, and I would've gotten fired! :0)
For our family day last week, we all went ice fishing on super slippery Green Lake. Jesse was not impressed at his lack of ability to stay standing, so I pushed him around on a sled. I took one nice digger that Daddy got a good picture of AND stuck my entire boot right through a hole in the ice, but other than that, we stayed relatively dry. We had hot chocolate and played around on the ice until naptime. One of our bait fish lived to see another day, so he is now our pet "until he dies," says Kaden. And his name.....wait for it...."Fishy." Of course.
We had a wonderful friend from Pennsylvania come and visit us for a long weekend this past week. He was sort of like a surrogate uncle to the kids while we lived out there. I fear Kaden may have sucked him dry, but he seemed to have a good time.
We took him to the coast, as he had never been there before - in 20 degree weather. It was FREEZING but beautiful. We fed the seagulls, and one POOPED on my head! That's a first! It felt like someone threw a rock at my skull! Both boys were quite the gentlemen as they proceeded to double over laughing hysterically before Kev would wipe it out of my hair for me! Good times! :0)
And now we are in the throes of support raising. It's been a slow start, but I do love getting together with people that we know and love and just hanging with each other for a few hours, sharing food and our hearts with them. It's been really nice reconnecting and building our team. There's always some wonderful encouragement right when we need it!
I'm off to scrapbook for the weekend with some friends, and I CAN'T WAIT! It has been well over a year since I even touched a photo. I have grand plans for what I hope to accomplish - 1,400 pics give or take. We shall see. We shall see.
And today, we are just hanging home - two boys with colds and their Mommy. A slow, lazy day of making bread, reading Little House on the Prairie, watching an occasional show, and maybe some painting...maybe even a baby to snuggle if friends want to enter the germ house!
Happy Wednesday!
Lots of little things happening lately. Mostly just life stuff. I'm finally starting to feel like I know what I'm doing at work. It's definitly not my LOVE sitting in an office by myself and working with numbers, paying bills etc. I actually find it quite funny that this is what I am getting paid to do, as I don't really have a sweet clue of the bills and money happenings in my own home! If Kev were to kick the bucket, I know where he keeps the file of "our life," but other than that - things wouldn't go south pretty fast!
Ah well. My work is only a few hours a week, it pays some bills, and I love the school. One couldn't ask for a nicer atmosphere to work in. This is the place where Kaden spent two days each week the first year of his life - in a little swing, exersaucer, or johnny jump up! The Lord knew that we needed to have Kaden first - Jesse would have lasted ten minutes in that tiny space before he would've freaked out, and I would've gotten fired! :0)
For our family day last week, we all went ice fishing on super slippery Green Lake. Jesse was not impressed at his lack of ability to stay standing, so I pushed him around on a sled. I took one nice digger that Daddy got a good picture of AND stuck my entire boot right through a hole in the ice, but other than that, we stayed relatively dry. We had hot chocolate and played around on the ice until naptime. One of our bait fish lived to see another day, so he is now our pet "until he dies," says Kaden. And his name.....wait for it...."Fishy." Of course.
We had a wonderful friend from Pennsylvania come and visit us for a long weekend this past week. He was sort of like a surrogate uncle to the kids while we lived out there. I fear Kaden may have sucked him dry, but he seemed to have a good time.
We took him to the coast, as he had never been there before - in 20 degree weather. It was FREEZING but beautiful. We fed the seagulls, and one POOPED on my head! That's a first! It felt like someone threw a rock at my skull! Both boys were quite the gentlemen as they proceeded to double over laughing hysterically before Kev would wipe it out of my hair for me! Good times! :0)
And now we are in the throes of support raising. It's been a slow start, but I do love getting together with people that we know and love and just hanging with each other for a few hours, sharing food and our hearts with them. It's been really nice reconnecting and building our team. There's always some wonderful encouragement right when we need it!
I'm off to scrapbook for the weekend with some friends, and I CAN'T WAIT! It has been well over a year since I even touched a photo. I have grand plans for what I hope to accomplish - 1,400 pics give or take. We shall see. We shall see.
And today, we are just hanging home - two boys with colds and their Mommy. A slow, lazy day of making bread, reading Little House on the Prairie, watching an occasional show, and maybe some painting...maybe even a baby to snuggle if friends want to enter the germ house!
Happy Wednesday!
Been Awhile.....
I just realized that I have been off the radar for quite some time now. I seem to go through phases of posting daily and sometimes multiple times daily...to people wondering if I've died because of the length of time that goes between posting!
I haven't purposefully become a hermit. I think that's just how I get sometimes when my life feels a little bit out of control and when there is so much change going on that I don't quite know how to process it all. I am quite a creature of habit, and I love when my life has a somewhat predictable routine. I talk big about "bringing on the change," but when it actually happens, it throws me for a loop until I can find a rhythm again.
Needless to say, there's pretty much nothing about our lives right now that looks like it did a few weeks ago. Well - that's not true. Kev is still leading worship at our church, and things are going really well there. AND - a huge blessing to us is that our landlord has guaranteed us another year here with our rent staying the same if Kev helps out a few hours a week marketing the hotel. So, those things are steady and stable. Two huge things for which I am thankful.
Pretty much everything else though.......whew! The winds of change are upon us. And it's good - it's all very good. It's just a lot to wrap my brain around. Whenever our family goes through a season of change - which seems to happen a lot with us - I always find myself really thoughtful as we process through all of the new.
It is during these somewhat stressful times of change that the Lord reminds me afresh and anew of my great need for Him, of the necessity of making time, and of the need to be still amidst the crazyness to hear His still small voice calling me and wooing me back to Him. He knows my heart. He knows what needs to be done. He knows what I need, and he knows the needs of my family.
He promises me just what I need for today. The light He provides for my path is just enough to see ahead for the next couple of steps. That is enough.
"He shall feed His flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with His arm, and carry them in his bosom, and He shall gently lead those that are with young." - Isaiah 40:11.
I haven't purposefully become a hermit. I think that's just how I get sometimes when my life feels a little bit out of control and when there is so much change going on that I don't quite know how to process it all. I am quite a creature of habit, and I love when my life has a somewhat predictable routine. I talk big about "bringing on the change," but when it actually happens, it throws me for a loop until I can find a rhythm again.
Needless to say, there's pretty much nothing about our lives right now that looks like it did a few weeks ago. Well - that's not true. Kev is still leading worship at our church, and things are going really well there. AND - a huge blessing to us is that our landlord has guaranteed us another year here with our rent staying the same if Kev helps out a few hours a week marketing the hotel. So, those things are steady and stable. Two huge things for which I am thankful.
Pretty much everything else though.......whew! The winds of change are upon us. And it's good - it's all very good. It's just a lot to wrap my brain around. Whenever our family goes through a season of change - which seems to happen a lot with us - I always find myself really thoughtful as we process through all of the new.
It is during these somewhat stressful times of change that the Lord reminds me afresh and anew of my great need for Him, of the necessity of making time, and of the need to be still amidst the crazyness to hear His still small voice calling me and wooing me back to Him. He knows my heart. He knows what needs to be done. He knows what I need, and he knows the needs of my family.
He promises me just what I need for today. The light He provides for my path is just enough to see ahead for the next couple of steps. That is enough.
"He shall feed His flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with His arm, and carry them in his bosom, and He shall gently lead those that are with young." - Isaiah 40:11.
Making Time
Came across a poem yesterday that I love. So good for me.....this mother who struggles with always wanting to accomplish things, who has a hard time just sitting and "being;" yet, who so desperately doesn't want to have any regrets.
* * * * * * *
Time is of the Essence
Now is the time to get things done,
wade in the water,
sit in the sun,
squish my toes
in the mud by the door,
explore the world in a boy just four.
Now is the time to study books,
flowers,
snails,
how a cloud looks;
to ponder "up,"
where God sleeps at nights,
why mosquitoes take such big bites.
Later there'll be time
to sew and clean,
paint the hall
that soft new green,
to make new drapes,
refinish the floor -
Later on....when he's not just four.
* * * * * * *
So good......so good
* * * * * * *
Time is of the Essence
Now is the time to get things done,
wade in the water,
sit in the sun,
squish my toes
in the mud by the door,
explore the world in a boy just four.
Now is the time to study books,
flowers,
snails,
how a cloud looks;
to ponder "up,"
where God sleeps at nights,
why mosquitoes take such big bites.
Later there'll be time
to sew and clean,
paint the hall
that soft new green,
to make new drapes,
refinish the floor -
Later on....when he's not just four.
* * * * * * *
So good......so good
Wonderland
We're snuggled up inside on another wintery day this Monday morning. It's usually the day when all my girls come over, but I'm thinking none of us will be braving the roads today.
It's been a very quiet, restful weekend for all of us over here. On Friday, we did absolutely nothing - and it was glorious. We all stayed in our pajamas all day, and we all took naps at naptime! That evening, we did go downstairs to the coffee shop to hear some friends play and sing....and after the boys went to sleep Kev and I did have a wee date with some Chinese - but it was a blissfully relaxing and sloooooow day.
On Saturday, we decided that we needed to go outside to get the stink blown off of us, so we went back to the Camden area to try another Mt. Battie trail! When we were there last weekend, one of the trails was completely plowed, so we took the stroller with us this time. Well, half of the trail was plowed, and half of it was super snowy, so we walked up as far as we had the gumption to do, and then Kev and Kaden hopped over to the other side of the trail and slid down while I tried to keep control of Jesse in the stroller while running down the mountain on the other side!
Yesterday, we had church in the morning as usual. During our first song, our saxophone player royally messed up his solo, and Kev and I could not hold it together on stage. The congregation was laughing too, so that was good, but - oh my word - I had problems keeping it together for the whole song. And to top things off - he was supposed to play a little ditty at the end of the song to finish it out, and he bombed that part, too! We literally had tears rolling down our faces as we were leaving the stage, and it took us a good five minutes back in the pew to pull things together. Good times! I haven't laughed that hard in awhile!
Church was cancelled last night because we thought the snow was coming in early, so we just vegged home as a family and we all watched part of a movie together with a fun little dessert. It was a very nice weekend before a very crazy week ahead. So, I am thankful for those three days.
But NOW - I haven't been around my friends for awhile, so I am CAGEY today! I need to pull myself together and find some things to keep all of us occupied while the storm rages around us. I'm going to look for some snowy, wintery books. We're maybe going to make a snowman cake, and if I feel really energetic we might do something that involves paint and messiness. We shall see! :0)
Happy winter wonderland!
It's been a very quiet, restful weekend for all of us over here. On Friday, we did absolutely nothing - and it was glorious. We all stayed in our pajamas all day, and we all took naps at naptime! That evening, we did go downstairs to the coffee shop to hear some friends play and sing....and after the boys went to sleep Kev and I did have a wee date with some Chinese - but it was a blissfully relaxing and sloooooow day.
On Saturday, we decided that we needed to go outside to get the stink blown off of us, so we went back to the Camden area to try another Mt. Battie trail! When we were there last weekend, one of the trails was completely plowed, so we took the stroller with us this time. Well, half of the trail was plowed, and half of it was super snowy, so we walked up as far as we had the gumption to do, and then Kev and Kaden hopped over to the other side of the trail and slid down while I tried to keep control of Jesse in the stroller while running down the mountain on the other side!
Yesterday, we had church in the morning as usual. During our first song, our saxophone player royally messed up his solo, and Kev and I could not hold it together on stage. The congregation was laughing too, so that was good, but - oh my word - I had problems keeping it together for the whole song. And to top things off - he was supposed to play a little ditty at the end of the song to finish it out, and he bombed that part, too! We literally had tears rolling down our faces as we were leaving the stage, and it took us a good five minutes back in the pew to pull things together. Good times! I haven't laughed that hard in awhile!
Church was cancelled last night because we thought the snow was coming in early, so we just vegged home as a family and we all watched part of a movie together with a fun little dessert. It was a very nice weekend before a very crazy week ahead. So, I am thankful for those three days.
But NOW - I haven't been around my friends for awhile, so I am CAGEY today! I need to pull myself together and find some things to keep all of us occupied while the storm rages around us. I'm going to look for some snowy, wintery books. We're maybe going to make a snowman cake, and if I feel really energetic we might do something that involves paint and messiness. We shall see! :0)
Happy winter wonderland!
Winter Daaaaaaaze.......
This winter has seemed very long to me.
I'm not sure if it's because I'm coming off of three MILD Pennsylvania "winters" or what, but man, I am tired of the snow and the cold and all of the bundling that goes with this. The process of it all is beginning to get to me.
I think I'm just feeling cagey and mundane and same ole same ole. Not sure.
I'm also not a huge fan of change, and there is a lot of that coming our way these days. All good things - all "God" things - and all also very stretching things for this lover of all things comfortable and safe. I tend to get into "panic mode" before I settle into the new norm of what our life is going to look like. I'm learning. I feel like I've walked this road enough times to have it down by now, but it always takes me a bit to process things through. And God is gracious.
Whenever new chapters come our way, lots of family revamping and rescheduling take place, lots of reorganizing of priorities, and lots of quiet reminders from the Lord to me that I need to be drawing ever closer to Him, ever seeking His face, and ever striving to become more like Him.
We are making a life change career wise, I'm going to be going back to my Christian School to work very part time starting this week, and we may possibly have to find a new place to live come spring. All pretty big things for me. All things that force me to rely on the Lord for my sufficiency and strength - and not myself. I am not called to be comfortable. I am called to be obedient. Life's a journey - and we try to view it as an adventure - laying it all out there with no regrets. I honestly do feel this way most of the time. Sometimes, I just think I forget! :0)
I am being reminded afresh and anew these days to hold things loosely with an open hand. "My soul waits in silence for God ONLY; from Him is my salvation. He ONLY is my rock and my salvation." ~ Psalm 62:1,2
Be still and know that He is God.
Be still and know that He is holy.
Be still oh restless soul of mine.
Bow before the Prince of Peace,
Let the noise and clamor cease.
Be still and know that He is God.
Be still and know that He is faithful.
Consider all that He has done.
Stand in awe and be amazed.
And know that He will never change.
Be still.
Be still and know that He is God.
Come rest your head upon His breast.
Listen to the rhythm of His unfailing heart of love.
Beating for His little ones.
Calling each of us to Come.
Be still.
Be speechless.
I'm not sure if it's because I'm coming off of three MILD Pennsylvania "winters" or what, but man, I am tired of the snow and the cold and all of the bundling that goes with this. The process of it all is beginning to get to me.
I think I'm just feeling cagey and mundane and same ole same ole. Not sure.
I'm also not a huge fan of change, and there is a lot of that coming our way these days. All good things - all "God" things - and all also very stretching things for this lover of all things comfortable and safe. I tend to get into "panic mode" before I settle into the new norm of what our life is going to look like. I'm learning. I feel like I've walked this road enough times to have it down by now, but it always takes me a bit to process things through. And God is gracious.
Whenever new chapters come our way, lots of family revamping and rescheduling take place, lots of reorganizing of priorities, and lots of quiet reminders from the Lord to me that I need to be drawing ever closer to Him, ever seeking His face, and ever striving to become more like Him.
We are making a life change career wise, I'm going to be going back to my Christian School to work very part time starting this week, and we may possibly have to find a new place to live come spring. All pretty big things for me. All things that force me to rely on the Lord for my sufficiency and strength - and not myself. I am not called to be comfortable. I am called to be obedient. Life's a journey - and we try to view it as an adventure - laying it all out there with no regrets. I honestly do feel this way most of the time. Sometimes, I just think I forget! :0)
I am being reminded afresh and anew these days to hold things loosely with an open hand. "My soul waits in silence for God ONLY; from Him is my salvation. He ONLY is my rock and my salvation." ~ Psalm 62:1,2
Be still and know that He is God.
Be still and know that He is holy.
Be still oh restless soul of mine.
Bow before the Prince of Peace,
Let the noise and clamor cease.
Be still and know that He is God.
Be still and know that He is faithful.
Consider all that He has done.
Stand in awe and be amazed.
And know that He will never change.
Be still.
Be still and know that He is God.
Come rest your head upon His breast.
Listen to the rhythm of His unfailing heart of love.
Beating for His little ones.
Calling each of us to Come.
Be still.
Be speechless.
A "Life With My Boys" Kind of Weekend.....
It has been a very fun Valentine's Day weekend celebrating with my three loves.
Kevy took me out on a date Friday night, and believe it or not - gasp! Hold your breath - I actually wore a cute little black dress with some funky black boots to go with it. Not bad for a highly "anti-dress" kind of girl. I figure that Valentine's Day warranted a little more dressing up. We went out for a really yummy meal and then saw a funny movie afterwards. It was a very nice evening of just relaxing together and reconnecting after some serious crazyness lately.
Yesterday morning, my boys let me sleep in, and when I woke up they had a day of adventure planned. We bundled up warm, made some hot chocolate in a thermos, packed a picnic lunch, and hightailed it over to Campden. We stopped at the trails that climb to Mt. Battie, pulled the kids up in one sled, and a huge stash of supplies in another, and walked UP one of the trails until we were wiped.

THEN, - this next part was Kev's brain child - we pitched a tent!

And inside this blue little wonder, we had a delish little picnic lunch - completely protected from the outside elements!

When we were finished, we loaded everything up and slid back down the trails all the way to our car! It was a MUCH shorter trip back to the car than it was up that hill, let me tell you! It was a hoot....and it was SO MUCH FUN!
Yes. This is life with the man that I married.
Then, we headed to our most fave coffee shop where Jesse proceeded to fill - and I mean FILL - his diaper....to the point of exploding out of his onesie, his long johns, his p.j's, his jeans, AND his snowsuit. It was amazing, to say the least...and it permeated the room. Fantastic. (Sidenote: just last week, Kaden projectile vomited some french fries all over Kev and the entire bathroom! These boys and their inner workings have outdone themselves these past few days).
No pictures for those two creations of joy. Hope none of you are disappointed.
Anyway, it's been a very nice weekend. I have been made to feel very loved and appreciated by my three boys, and it has been very restful and relaxing.
Kevy took me out on a date Friday night, and believe it or not - gasp! Hold your breath - I actually wore a cute little black dress with some funky black boots to go with it. Not bad for a highly "anti-dress" kind of girl. I figure that Valentine's Day warranted a little more dressing up. We went out for a really yummy meal and then saw a funny movie afterwards. It was a very nice evening of just relaxing together and reconnecting after some serious crazyness lately.
Yesterday morning, my boys let me sleep in, and when I woke up they had a day of adventure planned. We bundled up warm, made some hot chocolate in a thermos, packed a picnic lunch, and hightailed it over to Campden. We stopped at the trails that climb to Mt. Battie, pulled the kids up in one sled, and a huge stash of supplies in another, and walked UP one of the trails until we were wiped.

THEN, - this next part was Kev's brain child - we pitched a tent!

And inside this blue little wonder, we had a delish little picnic lunch - completely protected from the outside elements!

When we were finished, we loaded everything up and slid back down the trails all the way to our car! It was a MUCH shorter trip back to the car than it was up that hill, let me tell you! It was a hoot....and it was SO MUCH FUN!
Yes. This is life with the man that I married.
Then, we headed to our most fave coffee shop where Jesse proceeded to fill - and I mean FILL - his diaper....to the point of exploding out of his onesie, his long johns, his p.j's, his jeans, AND his snowsuit. It was amazing, to say the least...and it permeated the room. Fantastic. (Sidenote: just last week, Kaden projectile vomited some french fries all over Kev and the entire bathroom! These boys and their inner workings have outdone themselves these past few days).
No pictures for those two creations of joy. Hope none of you are disappointed.
Anyway, it's been a very nice weekend. I have been made to feel very loved and appreciated by my three boys, and it has been very restful and relaxing.
Our Journey....
This will be news for some.....not so much for others. Bear with me!
This past Sunday, Kev stepped down from his position of Pastor of Family Ministries at our church. This is a decision that we have been praying about for some time as we have felt the Lord's strong leading in our lives to go in a different direction. We love our new church family, and they will remain as our home church. Kev will also stay on staff as the part-time worship leader. Our pastor and deacon board have been nothing but supportive and understanding, and they have our full respect.
We are going to begin raising full-time support to be missionaries with U.S. Center for World Missions whose mission is to "see God’s Kingdom come and His will done on earth among all the world’s peoples." The number one reason why missionaries leave the field and why ministry teams disband is because of interpersonal problems. The goal of our ministry will be to fulfill Jesus' last prayer before He went to the Cross.
In John 17, He prayed that "we might be one!" He always knew what the biggest obstacle would be for the Gospel going forth. We want to use Clarion Consulting as a tool to help teams of believers - whether they be missions teams, a husband and wife team, or a church leadership or ministry team - be healthy and be "one" so that the Gospel will be proclaimed more effectively.
Did we make a mistake in coming back home and in coming to this church to take this position? No way! It's all been part of the journey and part of our story. We needed this process. We were going to stay an extra year out in Pennsylvania to do this exact thing while I finished out my Master's Degree, but we "common sensed" ourselves out of it because we had a super fussy baby and student loans. The timing wasn't right back then. It is now. This is what we have always wanted to do, and we thought we would be able to do it in this role that Kev accepted at our church. We have never doubted our calling. What we have found, however, is that this role is not the best fit for what we feel the Lord calling us to do.
Life is a journey of faith - full of chapters and twists and turns - some expected and some not. When we accepted this position we didn't know the future and couldn't see that this particular chapter of our lives would only be about five months. But God knew. He is confirming to us daily that this is the next step we need to be taking. He hasn't promised that it would be easy, but He HAS promised very clearly that He will take care of us and supply all of our needs. And isn't that what life is supposed to be all about, anyway? A life walked by faith and not by sight?
And I will tell you this - I firmly believe that MY number one calling is to follow my husband and to be his wife and the best mother possible to my children. My calling is easy! But, what a joy it is to watch your man walk his journey of faith with abandonment and passion and know in your heart of hearts that he is truly living out what he has been called to be and do.
Will we struggle? I'm banking on it.
Will it be our biggest test of faith ever? Ummmm. Have you been paying attention to our economy lately? People are being let go from their jobs right and left. In human eyes - who would EVER voluntarily give up a good paying job in today's times? But our trust is not in man. We are far less worried about safety and security and way more invested in purpose and meaning. We're on a journey of faith and obedience, and we're just putting one foot in front of the other until He leads otherwise.
Walk with us.
This past Sunday, Kev stepped down from his position of Pastor of Family Ministries at our church. This is a decision that we have been praying about for some time as we have felt the Lord's strong leading in our lives to go in a different direction. We love our new church family, and they will remain as our home church. Kev will also stay on staff as the part-time worship leader. Our pastor and deacon board have been nothing but supportive and understanding, and they have our full respect.
We are going to begin raising full-time support to be missionaries with U.S. Center for World Missions whose mission is to "see God’s Kingdom come and His will done on earth among all the world’s peoples." The number one reason why missionaries leave the field and why ministry teams disband is because of interpersonal problems. The goal of our ministry will be to fulfill Jesus' last prayer before He went to the Cross.
In John 17, He prayed that "we might be one!" He always knew what the biggest obstacle would be for the Gospel going forth. We want to use Clarion Consulting as a tool to help teams of believers - whether they be missions teams, a husband and wife team, or a church leadership or ministry team - be healthy and be "one" so that the Gospel will be proclaimed more effectively.
Did we make a mistake in coming back home and in coming to this church to take this position? No way! It's all been part of the journey and part of our story. We needed this process. We were going to stay an extra year out in Pennsylvania to do this exact thing while I finished out my Master's Degree, but we "common sensed" ourselves out of it because we had a super fussy baby and student loans. The timing wasn't right back then. It is now. This is what we have always wanted to do, and we thought we would be able to do it in this role that Kev accepted at our church. We have never doubted our calling. What we have found, however, is that this role is not the best fit for what we feel the Lord calling us to do.
Life is a journey of faith - full of chapters and twists and turns - some expected and some not. When we accepted this position we didn't know the future and couldn't see that this particular chapter of our lives would only be about five months. But God knew. He is confirming to us daily that this is the next step we need to be taking. He hasn't promised that it would be easy, but He HAS promised very clearly that He will take care of us and supply all of our needs. And isn't that what life is supposed to be all about, anyway? A life walked by faith and not by sight?
And I will tell you this - I firmly believe that MY number one calling is to follow my husband and to be his wife and the best mother possible to my children. My calling is easy! But, what a joy it is to watch your man walk his journey of faith with abandonment and passion and know in your heart of hearts that he is truly living out what he has been called to be and do.
Will we struggle? I'm banking on it.
Will it be our biggest test of faith ever? Ummmm. Have you been paying attention to our economy lately? People are being let go from their jobs right and left. In human eyes - who would EVER voluntarily give up a good paying job in today's times? But our trust is not in man. We are far less worried about safety and security and way more invested in purpose and meaning. We're on a journey of faith and obedience, and we're just putting one foot in front of the other until He leads otherwise.
Walk with us.
Things Not to Say During Labor....
I just came across this list in my travels and found it to be quite amusing.
To his credit, my husband has never once said anything even close to these things during my labors.....he just got a wee bit turned around on our way to the hospital with Jesse...after my water broke....while I was telling him that I needed to push "NOW"....and he asked me if we were supposed to turn right or left. He quickly closed his dear little lips and simply found his own way to our midwife!
Okay, here we go!
-- Gosh, you're lucky. I sure wish men could experience the miracle of childbirth.
-- Do you think the baby will come before Monday Night Football starts?
-- I hope you're ready. The Glamour Shot photographer will be here in fifteen minutes.
-- If you think this hurts, I should tell you about the time I twisted my ankle playing basketball.
-- That was the kids on the phone. Did you have anything planned for dinner?
-- When you lay on your back, you look like a python that swallowed a wild boar.
-- You don't need an epidural. Just relax and enjoy the moment.
-- This whole experience kind of reminds me of an episode from I Love Lucy.
-- Oops! Which cord was I supposed to cut?
-- Stop your swearing and just breathe.
-- Remember what we learned in Lamaze class! HEE HEE HOO HOO.
--You're not using the right words.
-- Your stomach still looks like there's another one in there.
(Taken from Generation Cedar).
To his credit, my husband has never once said anything even close to these things during my labors.....he just got a wee bit turned around on our way to the hospital with Jesse...after my water broke....while I was telling him that I needed to push "NOW"....and he asked me if we were supposed to turn right or left. He quickly closed his dear little lips and simply found his own way to our midwife!
Okay, here we go!
-- Gosh, you're lucky. I sure wish men could experience the miracle of childbirth.
-- Do you think the baby will come before Monday Night Football starts?
-- I hope you're ready. The Glamour Shot photographer will be here in fifteen minutes.
-- If you think this hurts, I should tell you about the time I twisted my ankle playing basketball.
-- That was the kids on the phone. Did you have anything planned for dinner?
-- When you lay on your back, you look like a python that swallowed a wild boar.
-- You don't need an epidural. Just relax and enjoy the moment.
-- This whole experience kind of reminds me of an episode from I Love Lucy.
-- Oops! Which cord was I supposed to cut?
-- Stop your swearing and just breathe.
-- Remember what we learned in Lamaze class! HEE HEE HOO HOO.
--You're not using the right words.
-- Your stomach still looks like there's another one in there.
(Taken from Generation Cedar).
Happy Valentine's Day Cookies
Pictures are a wee bit yellowish....sorry about that.

Warning: These are not healthy AT ALL! But, they're yummy and fun to make with your kidlets for a special Valentine's Day treat. Equally fun to give away, as well! :0) I have doubled the recipe, because I figure if you're getting out all of the mess for a wee batch, why not make a big one and share the wealth?
Each to his own....

Cookie ingredients:
2 cups sugar, 1 cup butter, 1/2 cup shortening (the only thing I EVER use shortening for), 2 Tablespoons vanilla, 4 eggs, 5 cups flour, 2 teaspoons baking powder, 1 teaspoon salt, 2/3 cup multi-colored long candy sprinkles (or whatever you have. I only had pink and brown today).
Chill dough at least one hour before rolling and shaping. Cut into hearts or whatever your little soul desires and bake at 325 degrees until set, but not crispy. Cookies should not be brown on the bottom. Approx. 10ish minutes. Cool.
Filling:
1 1/2 cups butter softened, 4 cups powdered sugar, 2 tablespoons canned milk, 1 teaspoon of vanilla OR almond extract, and 3-6 drops of red food coloring.
Spread one heaping teaspoon (or one large blob if you measure like I do) of filling between cookies and sandwich them together. Store filled cookies in fridge until partaking of or giving away!

Warning: These are not healthy AT ALL! But, they're yummy and fun to make with your kidlets for a special Valentine's Day treat. Equally fun to give away, as well! :0) I have doubled the recipe, because I figure if you're getting out all of the mess for a wee batch, why not make a big one and share the wealth?
Each to his own....

Cookie ingredients:
2 cups sugar, 1 cup butter, 1/2 cup shortening (the only thing I EVER use shortening for), 2 Tablespoons vanilla, 4 eggs, 5 cups flour, 2 teaspoons baking powder, 1 teaspoon salt, 2/3 cup multi-colored long candy sprinkles (or whatever you have. I only had pink and brown today).
Chill dough at least one hour before rolling and shaping. Cut into hearts or whatever your little soul desires and bake at 325 degrees until set, but not crispy. Cookies should not be brown on the bottom. Approx. 10ish minutes. Cool.
Filling:
1 1/2 cups butter softened, 4 cups powdered sugar, 2 tablespoons canned milk, 1 teaspoon of vanilla OR almond extract, and 3-6 drops of red food coloring.
Spread one heaping teaspoon (or one large blob if you measure like I do) of filling between cookies and sandwich them together. Store filled cookies in fridge until partaking of or giving away!

One Year Ago......
A year ago this week, this Mommy had the scare of her life. Jesse was seven months old, and it was the very weekend that he started scooting. Kev had a Saturday class, and I drove him to school because I wanted the car to go to the market later. In my hurry to get him out the door, I was careless and left my curling iron on and sitting on the floor in our bathroom. When the boys and I got back home from dropping Kev off, I completely forgot about it and went about my business. Kaden went to use the bathroom, Jesse crawled in after him, and the rest is history.

Certainly the most traumatic thing we have ever been through as a family. Days upon days of screaming and cleaning and bandaging and rebandaging his sweet little hands. 45 minutes to an hour both morning and evening. Trying times.

Our family experienced God's grace and mercy in amazing ways during those weeks and months, though. We have a very unique insurance, so because of this only certain doctors and hospitals will take us on. If we didn't have this situation, we would have simply gone to one of the doctor's right in the area of our school. Instead, our pediatrician sent us to the number one Pediatric Hospital in the nation with one of the very best plastic surgeons in that hospital. And get this - not only was our Dr. Chang one of the BEST.......he had a specialty, and it was specifically HANDS!

Kev doesn't like re-living those days, and neither do I. But, it is important to remember how very good God was to us and how well He took care of us! We got the number one hospital with the number one doctor who was known for making toes into fully functioning fingers and operating on far more severe burns than our little guy experienced. He took such great care of our baby and what was even more amazing was the fact that back in those days Jesse was quite the screamer.....and he was completely mesmerized and calm whenever this doctor took care of him.....every single time! I wanted to take him home with us!
Being in that hospital was also helpful for me to gain proper perspective of our situation. Many parents were experiencing far more excruciating and traumatic situations than we were. In the grand scheme of things, it could have been far far worse. Nothing I EVER want to go through again.....but it was helpful to be reminded of how many things I had to be thankful for.

This is not a great picture, but it shows how his fingers healed before having surgery. They healed somewhat claw-like, and the doctors said that as his hands grew he would be in pain because of the lack of skin there and he would not have full functionality like he should.
So, on Jesse's first birthday, he got a little blue cast and had a skin graft taken from his hips. You can't even see the hip scar today, and the scarring from his burns is all on the bottom of his hand, so no one ever even notices unless he flips his hand over. I can't believe that I don't have a picture of his hand now, but needless to say, it is completely healed with full and total functionality. Praise the Lord! There is a tiny little scar along the side of his middle finger that may need to be looked at when he turns three or four, but if it feels tight or painful not only will he be able to tell us by that age, but it will be the tiniest, most minor of surgeries - and in and out thing which will not be a big deal at all.
And knowing my Jesse like I do......methinks this will be the first of many a hospital visit! But the last of one that is because of me, Lord willing.......
* * * * * * * * * *
"He heals the brokenhearted....and binds up their wounds." ~ Psalm 147:3
"My soul, wait in silence for God only, for my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I shall not be shaken. On God...I rest; the rock of my strength, my refuge is in God. Trust in Him at all times, oh people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us." ~ Psalm 62:5-8
"When I remember You on my bed, I meditate on You in the night watches, for You have been my help, and in the shadow of Your wings I sing for joy. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me." ~ Psalm 63:6-8

Certainly the most traumatic thing we have ever been through as a family. Days upon days of screaming and cleaning and bandaging and rebandaging his sweet little hands. 45 minutes to an hour both morning and evening. Trying times.

Our family experienced God's grace and mercy in amazing ways during those weeks and months, though. We have a very unique insurance, so because of this only certain doctors and hospitals will take us on. If we didn't have this situation, we would have simply gone to one of the doctor's right in the area of our school. Instead, our pediatrician sent us to the number one Pediatric Hospital in the nation with one of the very best plastic surgeons in that hospital. And get this - not only was our Dr. Chang one of the BEST.......he had a specialty, and it was specifically HANDS!

Kev doesn't like re-living those days, and neither do I. But, it is important to remember how very good God was to us and how well He took care of us! We got the number one hospital with the number one doctor who was known for making toes into fully functioning fingers and operating on far more severe burns than our little guy experienced. He took such great care of our baby and what was even more amazing was the fact that back in those days Jesse was quite the screamer.....and he was completely mesmerized and calm whenever this doctor took care of him.....every single time! I wanted to take him home with us!
Being in that hospital was also helpful for me to gain proper perspective of our situation. Many parents were experiencing far more excruciating and traumatic situations than we were. In the grand scheme of things, it could have been far far worse. Nothing I EVER want to go through again.....but it was helpful to be reminded of how many things I had to be thankful for.

This is not a great picture, but it shows how his fingers healed before having surgery. They healed somewhat claw-like, and the doctors said that as his hands grew he would be in pain because of the lack of skin there and he would not have full functionality like he should.
So, on Jesse's first birthday, he got a little blue cast and had a skin graft taken from his hips. You can't even see the hip scar today, and the scarring from his burns is all on the bottom of his hand, so no one ever even notices unless he flips his hand over. I can't believe that I don't have a picture of his hand now, but needless to say, it is completely healed with full and total functionality. Praise the Lord! There is a tiny little scar along the side of his middle finger that may need to be looked at when he turns three or four, but if it feels tight or painful not only will he be able to tell us by that age, but it will be the tiniest, most minor of surgeries - and in and out thing which will not be a big deal at all.
And knowing my Jesse like I do......methinks this will be the first of many a hospital visit! But the last of one that is because of me, Lord willing.......
* * * * * * * * * *
"He heals the brokenhearted....and binds up their wounds." ~ Psalm 147:3
"My soul, wait in silence for God only, for my hope is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I shall not be shaken. On God...I rest; the rock of my strength, my refuge is in God. Trust in Him at all times, oh people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us." ~ Psalm 62:5-8
"When I remember You on my bed, I meditate on You in the night watches, for You have been my help, and in the shadow of Your wings I sing for joy. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me." ~ Psalm 63:6-8
Okay. I love this lady. I want to be like her when I grow up! She's funny. She's witty. She puts on no pretense. She's authentic. She's vulnerable. She's encouraging. And she is super cool.
I like what she is NOT even better.
She is NOT holier than thou. She does NOT admit to having it all together. She is NOT afraid to share when she is struggling. And she does NOT fake her walk with the Lord.
I wish we could be friends. I wish I could go over to her house for coffee and just glean from her. I wish she could come to our Monday morning Mommy times and share with us all of the things that she has learned from walking this journey and being down the road a little farther than us. But alas, it is not meant to be. Instead, I'll just have to read her blog every day and pretend that we're fabulous friends and tell everyone else about her!
Anyway, one of her posts that she had written quite awhile ago has always stuck with me, and I was reminded of it again when I had the privilege of watching a dear friend's three month old baby today. This baby was a little doll today - nearly perfect. There were only three somewhat intense moments of her crying pretty hard and me learning how she needed to be soothed. But, Mister Man, those few minutes took me smack dab back into what my life was like nineteen months ago when My Little Screamer entered my world. The first six months of this little guy's life are months that I will be happy to not have to repeat. They were intense. Many tears all around!
That's the jist of this post and the reason why I love it so much. It's all about remembering.
Remembering the super intense moments that take place all throughout the various stages of childrearing. And then, not only remembering these moments but also empathizing with our friends as we see them walk down those same roads with their babies.
Empathizing is far different than sharing unsolicited advice. Empathizing is different than joking about how it can only get worse! Empathizing is different than patronizing. Empathizing is coming alongside our sisters and walking the road with them. It's loving and accepting no matter what. It's not judging. It's bearing their burdens with them. I am blessed to have friends who do that for me. And it's what Christ does with all of us on a daily basis!
Anyway, read this post. It rocks. This is how I want to be encouraged by other moms. And this is how I want to be an encouragement to them.
I like what she is NOT even better.
She is NOT holier than thou. She does NOT admit to having it all together. She is NOT afraid to share when she is struggling. And she does NOT fake her walk with the Lord.
I wish we could be friends. I wish I could go over to her house for coffee and just glean from her. I wish she could come to our Monday morning Mommy times and share with us all of the things that she has learned from walking this journey and being down the road a little farther than us. But alas, it is not meant to be. Instead, I'll just have to read her blog every day and pretend that we're fabulous friends and tell everyone else about her!
Anyway, one of her posts that she had written quite awhile ago has always stuck with me, and I was reminded of it again when I had the privilege of watching a dear friend's three month old baby today. This baby was a little doll today - nearly perfect. There were only three somewhat intense moments of her crying pretty hard and me learning how she needed to be soothed. But, Mister Man, those few minutes took me smack dab back into what my life was like nineteen months ago when My Little Screamer entered my world. The first six months of this little guy's life are months that I will be happy to not have to repeat. They were intense. Many tears all around!
That's the jist of this post and the reason why I love it so much. It's all about remembering.
Remembering the super intense moments that take place all throughout the various stages of childrearing. And then, not only remembering these moments but also empathizing with our friends as we see them walk down those same roads with their babies.
Empathizing is far different than sharing unsolicited advice. Empathizing is different than joking about how it can only get worse! Empathizing is different than patronizing. Empathizing is coming alongside our sisters and walking the road with them. It's loving and accepting no matter what. It's not judging. It's bearing their burdens with them. I am blessed to have friends who do that for me. And it's what Christ does with all of us on a daily basis!
Anyway, read this post. It rocks. This is how I want to be encouraged by other moms. And this is how I want to be an encouragement to them.
Pooch Pops

I came across this cute little cookie recipe the other day in Family Fun Magazine. This is seriously one of the coolest resources for finding fun kid recipes, crafts, and really fun and creative ideas.
Anyway, we tried it, and it was really easy and the kids loved it. Granted, most of the cookies didn't come out looking like puppies, and I ended up not using the popsicle sticks, but they were still pretty yummy. Behold! A masterpiece!

POOCH POPS
2/3 cup all-purpose flour (I would use 1/3 next time. It made them a little dry)
1 roll refrigerated sugar cookie dough
2 TBlsp. unsweetened cocoa powder
8 lollipop sticks
2 TBlsp. mini chocolate chips
1 tube vanilla decorating frosting (not really necessary - just shove the candy into the dough)
24 brown and/or red M&M's - (or whatever candy you have. Jesse kept eating all the M&M's, so we ended up using different chips)!
1. - Preheat oven to 350. Line 2 cookie sheets with parchment paper. Knead flour into cookie dough until smooth. Divide dough in half. Knead cocoa powder into one half until smooth.
2. - Roll out vanilla and chocolate cookie doughs until they're barely 1/4 inch thick. Cut out 8 hearts from each using a 3-inch cookie cutter. Place the vanilla hearts about 3 inches apart on cookie sheet. Insert a lollipop stick into each heart shape. Slice the chocolate hearts in half lengthwise. Place on either side of vanilla hearts as the ears. Press 6 mini chocolate chips, pointed side down, on each of the vanilla hearts for freckles. Use frosting to attach eyes and nose - or just shove them in.
3. - Bake until just golden, 10 to 12 minutes. Transfer cookies to wire rack and cool completely. Tie a ribbon on the lollipop stick, if desired. Makes 8.

On Savoring......
I came across an awesome post by someone this morning.
I love reading about other moms and their children.....their struggles, their lessons learned, their love for their babies. I love reminders to savor, reminders that childhood is fleeting, reminders that these - the right here and right now moments - these are the glory days. These are the moments to savor and to drink in. These days are not for wishing away. Not for waiting for life to slow down and for the crazyness to be over.
These days are about CHOOSING to slow down. choosing to stop. to listen. to get down on my babies' level and to look them straight in their eyes and to truly see them. Clean floors don't matter. Piled high laundry will eventually get folded and put away. Dishes will get washed.......

And my chilren will grow and one day be gone....and then I'll have all the time in the world for that other stuff.
Jesus teach me. Remind me. Show me how fleeting this moment of motherhood is. Help me love as You do. To see my children through Your eyes.
To savor.
I love reading about other moms and their children.....their struggles, their lessons learned, their love for their babies. I love reminders to savor, reminders that childhood is fleeting, reminders that these - the right here and right now moments - these are the glory days. These are the moments to savor and to drink in. These days are not for wishing away. Not for waiting for life to slow down and for the crazyness to be over.
These days are about CHOOSING to slow down. choosing to stop. to listen. to get down on my babies' level and to look them straight in their eyes and to truly see them. Clean floors don't matter. Piled high laundry will eventually get folded and put away. Dishes will get washed.......

And my chilren will grow and one day be gone....and then I'll have all the time in the world for that other stuff.
Jesus teach me. Remind me. Show me how fleeting this moment of motherhood is. Help me love as You do. To see my children through Your eyes.
To savor.
I Want to be a Bezalel!
I had never heard of Mr. Bezalel before yesterday, but now he's my new fave and I love him! Might even want to name my next boy after him. (Big joke - Kev would never go for it).
I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study - a first for me - entitled "A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place," and I really really love it. She's taking us through the building of the Tabernacle in the Wilderness, and yesterday's lesson was all about this guy named Bezalel.
Bezalel was nothing out of the ordinary - just like me - but he was chosen by God because he was available and because he was obedient. Back in Old Testament days, before Pentecost, the Holy Spirit descended on only a handful of people - for a period of time - and these were mostly leaders, prophets, elders...basically "important" people. In all the list of those important few who were filled by the Spirit, Bezalel was the only one who was not a leader or a prophet. He was just a wage earner....a blue-collar guy. Nothing special. Yet, he was the only one in Old Testament history to be filled and empowered by the Holy Spirit to construct the Tabernacle. Super cool. Just a regular dude.
The name Bezalel means "in the shadow of God." This guy was not on a power trip or craving recognition. He was perfectly happy to dwell in the shadow of the Almighty! God's name was enough for him, and he considered it a privilege just to work on God's team.
This is so awesome! And so unlike me, I'm afraid. I too often love and crave the accolades and the recognition. I like the spotlight way too much. But, I so badly want to just simply be happy and content serving and loving Jesus....content to live in His shadow.
Okay. Here's where the lesson hit home for me.
God empowered this man for an assignment that was WAY out of his league......hmmmmm.....somewhat like motherhood for me...., and He did this ON PURPOSE! He purposely assigned Bezalel a task beyond his capability so that God could fill him with His power.
Motherhood IS completely out of my league - raising my kids to love Jesus, helping them to become young men of character, etc. etc. Anything and everything of priority in the Kingdom is waaaaay out of my league! BUT THAT'S SO GOOD! I need to remember that God has me in a position way beyond my capability so that I will be at His absolute mercy, realizing that only He can succeed.....never me - especially in my own strength.
Sincerity and sweat will never suffice! Good intentions will always result in failure.
God wants to raise my boys to be godly men THROUGH me. He doesn't want ME to do it! He wants me to simply let Him do His job through me as a completely open and willing vessel. If I can stop to remember that I work for Him - and not the other way around - with my assignment will ALWAYS come the guarantee that I will be equipped for the job. It is ONLY through Christ that I will be an effective mother, wife, friend, woman!
He promises to equip me "for the work of service" to the building up of [my boys]. (Ephesians 4:12) He measures grace to me (Ephesians 4:7), and He promises that when I am in His Word and have His Word being lived through me that through Him, I will "be adequate, thoroughly equipped for every good work!" (II Timothy 3: 16,17)
That's a promise that I will cling to! Just call me Mrs. Bezalel......
I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study - a first for me - entitled "A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place," and I really really love it. She's taking us through the building of the Tabernacle in the Wilderness, and yesterday's lesson was all about this guy named Bezalel.
Bezalel was nothing out of the ordinary - just like me - but he was chosen by God because he was available and because he was obedient. Back in Old Testament days, before Pentecost, the Holy Spirit descended on only a handful of people - for a period of time - and these were mostly leaders, prophets, elders...basically "important" people. In all the list of those important few who were filled by the Spirit, Bezalel was the only one who was not a leader or a prophet. He was just a wage earner....a blue-collar guy. Nothing special. Yet, he was the only one in Old Testament history to be filled and empowered by the Holy Spirit to construct the Tabernacle. Super cool. Just a regular dude.
The name Bezalel means "in the shadow of God." This guy was not on a power trip or craving recognition. He was perfectly happy to dwell in the shadow of the Almighty! God's name was enough for him, and he considered it a privilege just to work on God's team.
This is so awesome! And so unlike me, I'm afraid. I too often love and crave the accolades and the recognition. I like the spotlight way too much. But, I so badly want to just simply be happy and content serving and loving Jesus....content to live in His shadow.
Okay. Here's where the lesson hit home for me.
God empowered this man for an assignment that was WAY out of his league......hmmmmm.....somewhat like motherhood for me...., and He did this ON PURPOSE! He purposely assigned Bezalel a task beyond his capability so that God could fill him with His power.
Motherhood IS completely out of my league - raising my kids to love Jesus, helping them to become young men of character, etc. etc. Anything and everything of priority in the Kingdom is waaaaay out of my league! BUT THAT'S SO GOOD! I need to remember that God has me in a position way beyond my capability so that I will be at His absolute mercy, realizing that only He can succeed.....never me - especially in my own strength.
Sincerity and sweat will never suffice! Good intentions will always result in failure.
God wants to raise my boys to be godly men THROUGH me. He doesn't want ME to do it! He wants me to simply let Him do His job through me as a completely open and willing vessel. If I can stop to remember that I work for Him - and not the other way around - with my assignment will ALWAYS come the guarantee that I will be equipped for the job. It is ONLY through Christ that I will be an effective mother, wife, friend, woman!
He promises to equip me "for the work of service" to the building up of [my boys]. (Ephesians 4:12) He measures grace to me (Ephesians 4:7), and He promises that when I am in His Word and have His Word being lived through me that through Him, I will "be adequate, thoroughly equipped for every good work!" (II Timothy 3: 16,17)
That's a promise that I will cling to! Just call me Mrs. Bezalel......
Out of the Blue!
All of a sudden....
in the past couple of days, Kaden has discovered that he can write a whole whack of letters AND draw REAL pictures! This may not sound overly amazing to you, but it is the absolute coolest thing in my book to watch him literally go from one day drawing scrawly lines and squiggles to the next day writing letters and drawing real pictures!!!
He was just scrawling out a "picture" like he always does, and he looked down and said: "Hey! That's looks like an 'A'!" and it was like a lightbulb turned on inside his little head and something just clicked. He suddenly realized that he could write letters ALL BY HIMSELF! And now he's exploding with letters and asking me how to spell words right and left!

And then -
he was coloring with Grammy last evening, and he watched her create her own "real" picture, and it was like watching another lightbulb go on. And now - he's drawing pictures of trees and houses and suns and alien looking people....but they're real, honest to goodness PICTURES!
LOOK!!!

Amazing.
in the past couple of days, Kaden has discovered that he can write a whole whack of letters AND draw REAL pictures! This may not sound overly amazing to you, but it is the absolute coolest thing in my book to watch him literally go from one day drawing scrawly lines and squiggles to the next day writing letters and drawing real pictures!!!
He was just scrawling out a "picture" like he always does, and he looked down and said: "Hey! That's looks like an 'A'!" and it was like a lightbulb turned on inside his little head and something just clicked. He suddenly realized that he could write letters ALL BY HIMSELF! And now he's exploding with letters and asking me how to spell words right and left!

And then -
he was coloring with Grammy last evening, and he watched her create her own "real" picture, and it was like watching another lightbulb go on. And now - he's drawing pictures of trees and houses and suns and alien looking people....but they're real, honest to goodness PICTURES!
LOOK!!!

Amazing.
Not My Week......
OH. MY. WORD.
Somehow.....Someway.....in trying to add a new link to my "Good Things" Links on my sidebar, I deleted every blasted link over there - including that whole section! Seriously, I am concluding that I absolutely am unable to multi-task anymore.
Sooooo, if anyone can remember what I even had over there....or maybe some nice suggestions of things that I could add now, that would be fabulous. Even better, if there was some miraculous way that I could get them back, that would be awesome, too. Thanks.
Fantastic.
Somehow.....Someway.....in trying to add a new link to my "Good Things" Links on my sidebar, I deleted every blasted link over there - including that whole section! Seriously, I am concluding that I absolutely am unable to multi-task anymore.
Sooooo, if anyone can remember what I even had over there....or maybe some nice suggestions of things that I could add now, that would be fabulous. Even better, if there was some miraculous way that I could get them back, that would be awesome, too. Thanks.
Fantastic.
Yesterday......

Betty Crocker, I was NOT!!!
Holy Cow!!! Every single thing that I put my hands to bombed...ROYALLY!
We have a Mom's get together every Monday morning. I thought it would be fun to make some gingersnap cut-out cookies with the kids, so the older two helped me whip up the batter really quickly. I was rushing, and trying to multi-task, and misread the recipe BIG time! There was a grease spot on the ingredient amounts, and I mistook 1 teaspoon of baking soda and instead read 6 TEASPOONS! Holy nastiness!!
And the funny thing is, I didn't even notice until everyone had left and I had sent cookies home with the kidlets. I sat down and tried a bite of one for myself and just about died from the bitterness! In hindsight, I don't think any recipe that I have EVER made has called for six teaspoons of baking soda! Ha!
And then - later in the afternoon I was trying to make supper with my crabby younger son who had just awakened from his nap WHILE talking on the phone with a long lost friend who never updates her blog so I can't ever really catch up on her life...ahem...hint hint. So, needless to say, I was focusing more on our conversation rather than the recipe, and instead of putting curry in, I put in cumin - which KILLS my husband's stomach, by the way! Once I realized, I shook a whole bunch of curry on top of that, added a little honey for sweetness, and chucked it onto the table!
And in that moment, I decided that I was done in the kitchen for the day.
Snow Day!

Snow is falling around these here parts - not too hard yet, really, but our church still cancelled for the day. We were actually the ONLY ones in the area to cancel! Kinda' funny.
We were all bundled and at church by 7:45 before the decision was made. It was actually closer to 9:00 by the time all details were wrapped up and we were able to head home, so we spontaneously called some friends and decided to go out to breakfast on our way. Tons of fun!
I love having days like this.
Usually our Sundays are so crazy - we practically live at the church all day. I actually don't mind that at all, and I love our new church family. But, this kind of feels like a snow day cancellation from school. You get all revved up for a busy day and then find out that you get to stay home all nice and cozy with your family! I love that! We're going to go out and play in the snow a little later and then maybe make some cut-out cookies together.
It's really been a nice week-end. It's felt like a mini vacation in a way. A good balance between errands and projects that have waiting to be done and also lots of vegging and family time and play. Love that.
Happy snowy day to the rest of you! May it be filled with cozyness, hot chocolate, and some fun family moments! And maybe even a nap!
Baby, It's Cold Outside!

Wow! Is it ever cold out today! No one's car in the parking lot would start this morning, and my nostril hairs kept sticking together. Good times.
We're finding it somewhat difficult to think of ideas of what to do on our family days when it's so blasted frigid out. Hubby is one who likes to get out and about and doesn't really love sitting still for long, so we almost always go somewhere on our Fridays together. But, usually we drive somewhere so that we can be outside....and man - that's been hard to do! Any ideas?
Pre-kids, we would have hightailed it to the coast, even to just get out for a couple of minutes. But, that's not fun for the boys - especially Jesse who hates to be belted in even for a 30 second drive to church. They need to be able to get out and RUN if they're going to be driving for a trip anywhere. It's too cold for hikes or sliding...or maybe we've just gotten too wimpy. I'm not sure. We just hate being cooped up inside all day. All three boys start jumping off the walls!
So, we ran a couple of errands and then went to the mall and let them run around and play there. I'm so not a mall Mom, but it's fun once in awhile. Especially when treats are involved.
Now I'm sorting through a plan of attack for fun crafty ideas and things to do inside during these freezing cold days of yuck. I've got some ideas rolling around that I'll share if they're successes. We made some pretty fun homemade playdoh yesterday. Easy sneezy. For each kid: 1/4 cup salt and 1/2 cup flour. Let them stir that all around in a huge bowl. In another bowl add 1/4 cup warm water and let them have at it with making their own color out of food coloring. (Obviously, help the wee ones on this step. Jesse tried drinking his when I wasn't paying attention. Ahem). Mix all together and go to town with cookie cutters, feathers, toothpicks...whatever! Slightly messy, but good for about an hour of entertainment. It's worth it!
Before laying Kaden down to nap we had a cute little conversation, today. I said, "Kaden, do you know how much Mommy loves having you two boys?" He said: "Yeah. And you get to have THREE boys! How lucky are you?!!!"
Super blessed, Buddy.
Plan for the Joy
Nothing amazingly profound to report from my own lips today. Just wanting to share some tidbits from a couple of blogs that I read who are farther down the journey of motherhood than I and who are thus, much wiser than I about what is important and lasting in life and child-rearing.
A Mom of twelve writes:
* * * * * * * * * *
"Have you heard? Life is fleeting. Time is deceptive. The days are evil. That’s right, I said evil. In other words, the days are crafty little buggars. They lull you into a false sense of security, of feeling like nothing will ever change, and all the while…it is. Antique Mommy’s post here was yet another reminder to slow down, enjoy the moment, and most importantly, to plan for joy in our everyday moments. She does not advocate trying to fabricate joy, but to simply expect it. To be ready for it.
To have eyes to see it.
There are pearls in these days of ours. Pearls straight from God’s hand in the form of sunrises and sunsets, gentle breezes and fierce storms, clamoring voices and bubbling laughter, messes and mishaps. Is it possible that the irksome interruptions that derail me from my goals are themselves the goals instead? Too often I am the sow trampling those pearls of opportunity under my feet: unthinking, unappreciative…unwilling.
You’ve heard all this before. So have I. Taking our lives for granted is a priviledge only possible for a small percentage of the world’s population, and I’m part of that. I don’t want to be guilt-ridden, I just want to do better. And so I’ll keep saying it, if for no other reason than to remind myself to pull my head out of the mire.
Because someday, instead of mindlessly mucking about in the feed trough, I want to spy the pearls that are right in front of me. I want to pluck them up out of the mud, polish them, and string them on cords of gratitude to the One who scatters them with such indiscriminate liberality".
* * * * * * * * * *
Another AWESOME and oh-so-real post about discovering joy in the journey can be found over here by another busy Mommy of many who gets it.
We're all on this journey of motherhood and life together. No one ever said it would be easy; in fact - we should expect it to be hard.....because Satan wants us to fail! But we need to savor these years and these moments, we need to drink them in, because they are fleeting, and before we know it - they'll be gone!
Lord, help me to discover the joy in the mundane....to slow down the "tyranny of the urgent,"......and to plan for the joy in the everyday moments of this life that You have given me! Give me Your Joy - complete and overflowing, and may it spill over onto all who come in contact with me......
A Mom of twelve writes:
* * * * * * * * * *
"Have you heard? Life is fleeting. Time is deceptive. The days are evil. That’s right, I said evil. In other words, the days are crafty little buggars. They lull you into a false sense of security, of feeling like nothing will ever change, and all the while…it is. Antique Mommy’s post here was yet another reminder to slow down, enjoy the moment, and most importantly, to plan for joy in our everyday moments. She does not advocate trying to fabricate joy, but to simply expect it. To be ready for it.
To have eyes to see it.
There are pearls in these days of ours. Pearls straight from God’s hand in the form of sunrises and sunsets, gentle breezes and fierce storms, clamoring voices and bubbling laughter, messes and mishaps. Is it possible that the irksome interruptions that derail me from my goals are themselves the goals instead? Too often I am the sow trampling those pearls of opportunity under my feet: unthinking, unappreciative…unwilling.
You’ve heard all this before. So have I. Taking our lives for granted is a priviledge only possible for a small percentage of the world’s population, and I’m part of that. I don’t want to be guilt-ridden, I just want to do better. And so I’ll keep saying it, if for no other reason than to remind myself to pull my head out of the mire.
Because someday, instead of mindlessly mucking about in the feed trough, I want to spy the pearls that are right in front of me. I want to pluck them up out of the mud, polish them, and string them on cords of gratitude to the One who scatters them with such indiscriminate liberality".
* * * * * * * * * *
Another AWESOME and oh-so-real post about discovering joy in the journey can be found over here by another busy Mommy of many who gets it.
We're all on this journey of motherhood and life together. No one ever said it would be easy; in fact - we should expect it to be hard.....because Satan wants us to fail! But we need to savor these years and these moments, we need to drink them in, because they are fleeting, and before we know it - they'll be gone!
Lord, help me to discover the joy in the mundane....to slow down the "tyranny of the urgent,"......and to plan for the joy in the everyday moments of this life that You have given me! Give me Your Joy - complete and overflowing, and may it spill over onto all who come in contact with me......
Frustrating!
Wow....gotta love apartment life. I just wrote a whole post, and we lost our signal here so everything got lost. Fantastic. Okaaaay, learning patience here. Anyway.....
We've had a nice weekend. It seems to have taken us a long time to find our groove here. Longer than we thought it would. Kev has always had one day off a week - for which we are all so very thankful. I know that we are blessed and that not everyone is able to have that gift. Usually on this our family day, we hightail it somewhere - anywhere - for a fun family day. But, I think we have only done this one time in the past three months. Very bad.
Anyway, we decided that yesterday we needed to get back into our rhythm, and we kicked it to our most fave coffee shop down in Camden. Kev and I love this place so much, that we don't even think twice about the hour (plus) time it takes to get there! It's a very funky and eclectic place that has awesome food and pastries, and really yummy organic coffee. We have yet to try something that we don't absolutely love - and we are coffee shop prissies! So, we went there for lunch and then walked next door to one of our favorite kid stores. This place had a train table set up for kids to play at as well as a fun little kitchen area. Jesse filled his pants while we were there, so we played until he stunk up the ENTIRE place, and then we hightailed it out of there. Good times, good times.
Yesterday I had one of my cleaning/culling urges. Kev and Kaden ran errands in the morning while Jesse and I cleaned and did laundry, and then during naps Kev and I reorganized our life that's in the attic storage. We managed to fill three trash bags and three yard sale boxes, so the clutter of my life seems lightened considerably. I hate stuff.
In other news, Jesse took a face plant off one of our waist high chairs yesterday. He took a diving, face planting leap out of his pack and play at church today. And I fell on the way to the car while holding him this morning and gave him a massive whip lash! If he makes it until two, I will be amazed!!
We've had a nice weekend. It seems to have taken us a long time to find our groove here. Longer than we thought it would. Kev has always had one day off a week - for which we are all so very thankful. I know that we are blessed and that not everyone is able to have that gift. Usually on this our family day, we hightail it somewhere - anywhere - for a fun family day. But, I think we have only done this one time in the past three months. Very bad.
Anyway, we decided that yesterday we needed to get back into our rhythm, and we kicked it to our most fave coffee shop down in Camden. Kev and I love this place so much, that we don't even think twice about the hour (plus) time it takes to get there! It's a very funky and eclectic place that has awesome food and pastries, and really yummy organic coffee. We have yet to try something that we don't absolutely love - and we are coffee shop prissies! So, we went there for lunch and then walked next door to one of our favorite kid stores. This place had a train table set up for kids to play at as well as a fun little kitchen area. Jesse filled his pants while we were there, so we played until he stunk up the ENTIRE place, and then we hightailed it out of there. Good times, good times.
Yesterday I had one of my cleaning/culling urges. Kev and Kaden ran errands in the morning while Jesse and I cleaned and did laundry, and then during naps Kev and I reorganized our life that's in the attic storage. We managed to fill three trash bags and three yard sale boxes, so the clutter of my life seems lightened considerably. I hate stuff.
In other news, Jesse took a face plant off one of our waist high chairs yesterday. He took a diving, face planting leap out of his pack and play at church today. And I fell on the way to the car while holding him this morning and gave him a massive whip lash! If he makes it until two, I will be amazed!!
My 300th Post!
Holy Canolli! Who would've known I would have so much to say that I've reached my 300th post?.....Ahem....don't answer that! :0)
So, I've been thinking a lot about this whole world of blogging lately. Mostly because of my last post, I guess, and because of friends who have posted similar things on their blogs.....and because of many recent conversations with friends.
And I think this whole blogger world is an awesome thing, to be sure.
The whole reason why I originally created a blog was to keep in contact with my friends from Maine while living in Philly. And now I do it not only to stay in daily/weekly touch with them but also with my frieds that we left behind in Philly! This sort of thing works really great for me because I'm not a real lover of the phone, but I do love to just kind of pop into people's lives (blogs) and see what's going on with them every few days.
However.....I think blogs are kind of like a "pseudo-life" that in many ways aren't totally REAL. Well, they are real to an extent....but they don't really show the true day to day lives of each of us....which can lead to people thinking each other's lives are maybe something more than they really are. Are you following me? :0) What I mean is, I tend to only post when I feel like I have something worthwhile to say, or when we did something that was worth posting - like something funny or cute or family oriented. I don't post about the mundane or the more bummer of days - especially in the moment. Because, in the moment, I don't feel like doing ANYTHING, let alone post something on a numb blog. Or if I DO post about them - it's when they are already said and done, so they don't look nearly as bleak as they did in the moment.
So, maybe certain people's blogs portray them as being totally exciting, or having perfect families, or always on the go and up for anything, or always painting and coloring and baking and doing crafty things with their kids - when REALLY they maybe only do that once a week and they chose that particular day to post. You know what I mean?
For example, I didn't write about Kaden and I hurling our cookies all day on Monday because I thought I'd spare people the juicy details. Nor did I write about how we all sat around in our p.j.'s and watched t.v. ALL day the next day because I didn't want people to judge me! :0) And there are other days where all I did was laundry, dishes, and made supper. Nothing to get up in the night and rave about - let alone post about. You get my drift?
So, I am going to try to find the balance of being totally real and "in the moment" about everything and anything and have my blog really and truly portray who I am, but also spare the oh so many boring details of our lives, as well...which happens more often than not!
Thus endeth my rambly post! Happy Thursday, everyone!
So, I've been thinking a lot about this whole world of blogging lately. Mostly because of my last post, I guess, and because of friends who have posted similar things on their blogs.....and because of many recent conversations with friends.
And I think this whole blogger world is an awesome thing, to be sure.
The whole reason why I originally created a blog was to keep in contact with my friends from Maine while living in Philly. And now I do it not only to stay in daily/weekly touch with them but also with my frieds that we left behind in Philly! This sort of thing works really great for me because I'm not a real lover of the phone, but I do love to just kind of pop into people's lives (blogs) and see what's going on with them every few days.
However.....I think blogs are kind of like a "pseudo-life" that in many ways aren't totally REAL. Well, they are real to an extent....but they don't really show the true day to day lives of each of us....which can lead to people thinking each other's lives are maybe something more than they really are. Are you following me? :0) What I mean is, I tend to only post when I feel like I have something worthwhile to say, or when we did something that was worth posting - like something funny or cute or family oriented. I don't post about the mundane or the more bummer of days - especially in the moment. Because, in the moment, I don't feel like doing ANYTHING, let alone post something on a numb blog. Or if I DO post about them - it's when they are already said and done, so they don't look nearly as bleak as they did in the moment.
So, maybe certain people's blogs portray them as being totally exciting, or having perfect families, or always on the go and up for anything, or always painting and coloring and baking and doing crafty things with their kids - when REALLY they maybe only do that once a week and they chose that particular day to post. You know what I mean?
For example, I didn't write about Kaden and I hurling our cookies all day on Monday because I thought I'd spare people the juicy details. Nor did I write about how we all sat around in our p.j.'s and watched t.v. ALL day the next day because I didn't want people to judge me! :0) And there are other days where all I did was laundry, dishes, and made supper. Nothing to get up in the night and rave about - let alone post about. You get my drift?
So, I am going to try to find the balance of being totally real and "in the moment" about everything and anything and have my blog really and truly portray who I am, but also spare the oh so many boring details of our lives, as well...which happens more often than not!
Thus endeth my rambly post! Happy Thursday, everyone!
Okaaaaay........Want to Play a Game?
I just got off of the phone with a friend who shall remain anonymous, but I just want you to know - dear friend - that this one is for you! You are the second person in the span of a few weeks here who has commented on the "peppy-ness" of my blog and, I believe the question of: "How come you are always so happy?" also came about in said conversation a few times.
I scan a few blogs where all that I read is perpetual sunshine and rainbows and butterflies and to be quite frank - I find them sickening, and they drive me absolutely CRAZY! Whenever I read these blogs, I feel like gagging from the oh so perfect gloriousness of these people's lives, and they by no means encourage me or brighten my day in ANY shape of the imagination...and I find it hard to believe that nothing EVER goes wrong in their lives and that they don't ever struggle.
Sooooo, if my blog is one of those kinds of blogs - by all means - shoot me right now! Generally - I really do love my life, and I am a happy person, overall - but BY NO MEANS am I sunshine and butterflies all day every day. It has never been my intention to come across this way in my writing. In fact, I have been trying to be more intentional about writing about ALL things in my life - the good, the bad, AND the ugly.
I know that we all struggle with things - some of us are just better at hiding these things than others, and it's super hard to be vulnerable...especially with people who seem to have life all together and tied up in a pretty bow all the time. I don't want to be one of those people. If I have done that, I am going to clear up a few things right now. Settle in, because this post is a long one. But, I just want to share a small sampling - a tiny tidbit - of the things that I am currently struggling with and, by God's grace, working through.
I'll call it - Amy's Top Ten Current Things of Yuck, and I'm just going to lay it all out there - no excuses, no nothing.
1. I think about my personal appearance more than I should. Since we've moved home I've gained ten pounds. Not sure how or when it happened, but it's somewhat all consuming and frustrating to me; and it's all I can seem to think about.
2. Whenever I go to certain friend's homes and see their creativity or things that I want or their lack of toys and stuff everywhere or their Suzy Homemaker abilities, I have to constantly fight the urge to not be ungrateful and to not covet. Kev can tell when I've been visiting them just by my attitude - I can become a completely different person and all of a sudden hate my home and all things in it instantly!
3. Kaden did not have a stellar Christmas in the "thankfulness department." This entire holiday I had to constantly remind him to thank the gift giver, to not compare what he got to others, to be happy with what he was given, and to actually LOOK at the present before tossing it to the side. Many moments of feeling like a failure here and of being embarassed......and not necessarily for the right reasons, either. I wanted him to act appropriately, so that people would see what a great kid he is.....so that in turn - they would think what a great mom I am.
4. I like the spotlight. I like accolades. When someone else gets them instead of me, I get jealous. (Nice, eh?)
5. There are MANY days (and often many moments within said days) where I could bonk my kids' heads together and promptly throw them out the window! In the four years that I have been a mother, I have never cried more in my life or felt more lonely or like a failure in EVERY area of my life. Half of the time I don't have a clue what I'm doing, I don't feel like I'm doing a good job, and I feel like everyone around has "it" completely together and never struggles with ANYTHING!
6. I am a people pleaser. I worry far more about what people think of me and my home and my mothering and my family and my LIFE than of what THE LORD thinks of any of those things.
7. Kaden and I are very different in our personalities. He is shy and timid and slower than death on stilts, and he needs things explained to the 9th degree......and I am not. I have to constantly reign myself in from constantly being short with him just because he handles life differently than me! I want to let him be HIM, but sometimes it's hard! And Jesse has me eating humble pie every day - he has had phases of biting, hitting, screaming, throwing, and all said things put together at once....and often in public!
8. Sometimes I crave "life before kids." I enjoyed working, I loved my independence, and I loved my home neat, sparse, and organized! In the darkest depths within me lies a career woman who could potentially leave my family in the dust for the lure of the spotlight and "things of importance" that can be measured by the world's standards. I know in my heart of hearts that what I am doing is of utmost importance in the Lord's eyes and that it is my highest calling, and MOST often I really am living my dream in being able to stay home with them....but there are days....just so you know.
9. I compare, compare, compare. And I don't compare myself to the Lord's standards, but I compare myself to everyone around me. When I look at myself through the lens of other's lives I see that I don't play enough with my children, I'm not creative enough with them, I shouldn't be so excited for naptimes, I'm not structured enough....or maybe I'm too structured, I enjoy being away from them more than I should....or maybe I'm too protective and don't leave them enough, I worry too much about the neatness of my home, I need to have a huge family if I'm a good Christian, don't I?, homeschool or regular school....and on and on and on. I could go crazy if I let myself.
10. Up until just last month, my quiet time with the Lord ROTTED, and was sporatic at best. I am just getting back into the routine that I think He is pleased with along with the right motivation behind WHY I am having my quiet time. And the reason why (I am reminded afresh and anew - almost every day it seems -) is that I desperately need Him and His wisdom and grace. I am a hopeless failure without Him!
So, there you have it. Real pretty, eh?
Did that encourage anyone?
Can anyone else relate?......Anyone else want to play?
I scan a few blogs where all that I read is perpetual sunshine and rainbows and butterflies and to be quite frank - I find them sickening, and they drive me absolutely CRAZY! Whenever I read these blogs, I feel like gagging from the oh so perfect gloriousness of these people's lives, and they by no means encourage me or brighten my day in ANY shape of the imagination...and I find it hard to believe that nothing EVER goes wrong in their lives and that they don't ever struggle.
Sooooo, if my blog is one of those kinds of blogs - by all means - shoot me right now! Generally - I really do love my life, and I am a happy person, overall - but BY NO MEANS am I sunshine and butterflies all day every day. It has never been my intention to come across this way in my writing. In fact, I have been trying to be more intentional about writing about ALL things in my life - the good, the bad, AND the ugly.
I know that we all struggle with things - some of us are just better at hiding these things than others, and it's super hard to be vulnerable...especially with people who seem to have life all together and tied up in a pretty bow all the time. I don't want to be one of those people. If I have done that, I am going to clear up a few things right now. Settle in, because this post is a long one. But, I just want to share a small sampling - a tiny tidbit - of the things that I am currently struggling with and, by God's grace, working through.
I'll call it - Amy's Top Ten Current Things of Yuck, and I'm just going to lay it all out there - no excuses, no nothing.
1. I think about my personal appearance more than I should. Since we've moved home I've gained ten pounds. Not sure how or when it happened, but it's somewhat all consuming and frustrating to me; and it's all I can seem to think about.
2. Whenever I go to certain friend's homes and see their creativity or things that I want or their lack of toys and stuff everywhere or their Suzy Homemaker abilities, I have to constantly fight the urge to not be ungrateful and to not covet. Kev can tell when I've been visiting them just by my attitude - I can become a completely different person and all of a sudden hate my home and all things in it instantly!
3. Kaden did not have a stellar Christmas in the "thankfulness department." This entire holiday I had to constantly remind him to thank the gift giver, to not compare what he got to others, to be happy with what he was given, and to actually LOOK at the present before tossing it to the side. Many moments of feeling like a failure here and of being embarassed......and not necessarily for the right reasons, either. I wanted him to act appropriately, so that people would see what a great kid he is.....so that in turn - they would think what a great mom I am.
4. I like the spotlight. I like accolades. When someone else gets them instead of me, I get jealous. (Nice, eh?)
5. There are MANY days (and often many moments within said days) where I could bonk my kids' heads together and promptly throw them out the window! In the four years that I have been a mother, I have never cried more in my life or felt more lonely or like a failure in EVERY area of my life. Half of the time I don't have a clue what I'm doing, I don't feel like I'm doing a good job, and I feel like everyone around has "it" completely together and never struggles with ANYTHING!
6. I am a people pleaser. I worry far more about what people think of me and my home and my mothering and my family and my LIFE than of what THE LORD thinks of any of those things.
7. Kaden and I are very different in our personalities. He is shy and timid and slower than death on stilts, and he needs things explained to the 9th degree......and I am not. I have to constantly reign myself in from constantly being short with him just because he handles life differently than me! I want to let him be HIM, but sometimes it's hard! And Jesse has me eating humble pie every day - he has had phases of biting, hitting, screaming, throwing, and all said things put together at once....and often in public!
8. Sometimes I crave "life before kids." I enjoyed working, I loved my independence, and I loved my home neat, sparse, and organized! In the darkest depths within me lies a career woman who could potentially leave my family in the dust for the lure of the spotlight and "things of importance" that can be measured by the world's standards. I know in my heart of hearts that what I am doing is of utmost importance in the Lord's eyes and that it is my highest calling, and MOST often I really am living my dream in being able to stay home with them....but there are days....just so you know.
9. I compare, compare, compare. And I don't compare myself to the Lord's standards, but I compare myself to everyone around me. When I look at myself through the lens of other's lives I see that I don't play enough with my children, I'm not creative enough with them, I shouldn't be so excited for naptimes, I'm not structured enough....or maybe I'm too structured, I enjoy being away from them more than I should....or maybe I'm too protective and don't leave them enough, I worry too much about the neatness of my home, I need to have a huge family if I'm a good Christian, don't I?, homeschool or regular school....and on and on and on. I could go crazy if I let myself.
10. Up until just last month, my quiet time with the Lord ROTTED, and was sporatic at best. I am just getting back into the routine that I think He is pleased with along with the right motivation behind WHY I am having my quiet time. And the reason why (I am reminded afresh and anew - almost every day it seems -) is that I desperately need Him and His wisdom and grace. I am a hopeless failure without Him!
So, there you have it. Real pretty, eh?
Did that encourage anyone?
Can anyone else relate?......Anyone else want to play?
Happy New Year!
Hubby is sleeping in this morning, the boys are dancing around in their new matching p.j.'s, and I'm snagging a few minutes on this new morning in the new year to write a bit. When I was writing our Christmas letter, I was once again struck by just how much can happen in the span of one little year. I find the saying, "the days are long, but the years are fleeting," to be especially true when I look back over the span of a few months!
In 2008 we were living in Philly, we were students, our baby had surgery, somehow he became a toddler, somehow Kaden turned four, we celebrated nine years of marriage, we graduated, we moved back to our roots, we lived in two different places, Kev got a new job, we have a new church, and now.... we're in a new year! Insane.
I wonder what 2009 will hold for us?
Life is such a crazy adventure, and I like to hope that I'm up for anything. We'll see what the Lord has in store for us. Another baby? (Nothing to report. I just don't feel that our family is complete as of yet). Another move? (Oh Lord. That might not be my favorite right now! I'd be content to stay here for a few more months, at least). Homeschooling or Christian School? (If we go the Christian School route - we need to decide Kindergarten at five or Kindergarten at six? We're pretty sure we're going to wait until he's six. We're just really praying about the "where" and the "what" right now). Yikes. And who knows what else will take place?
As my kids grow, I am often floored and overwhelmed at the responsibility that I have before me, I get almost panicky at how fast time seems to be flying, I feel filled to overflowing with love and thankfulness at the gift that I have been given in them, and I feel completely inadequate, often frazzled, very blessed, and most generally happy and content! It's a good life, and it's been a good year.
In 2008 we were living in Philly, we were students, our baby had surgery, somehow he became a toddler, somehow Kaden turned four, we celebrated nine years of marriage, we graduated, we moved back to our roots, we lived in two different places, Kev got a new job, we have a new church, and now.... we're in a new year! Insane.
I wonder what 2009 will hold for us?
Life is such a crazy adventure, and I like to hope that I'm up for anything. We'll see what the Lord has in store for us. Another baby? (Nothing to report. I just don't feel that our family is complete as of yet). Another move? (Oh Lord. That might not be my favorite right now! I'd be content to stay here for a few more months, at least). Homeschooling or Christian School? (If we go the Christian School route - we need to decide Kindergarten at five or Kindergarten at six? We're pretty sure we're going to wait until he's six. We're just really praying about the "where" and the "what" right now). Yikes. And who knows what else will take place?
As my kids grow, I am often floored and overwhelmed at the responsibility that I have before me, I get almost panicky at how fast time seems to be flying, I feel filled to overflowing with love and thankfulness at the gift that I have been given in them, and I feel completely inadequate, often frazzled, very blessed, and most generally happy and content! It's a good life, and it's been a good year.
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