Okay. I love this lady. I want to be like her when I grow up! She's funny. She's witty. She puts on no pretense. She's authentic. She's vulnerable. She's encouraging. And she is super cool.

I like what she is NOT even better.

She is NOT holier than thou. She does NOT admit to having it all together. She is NOT afraid to share when she is struggling. And she does NOT fake her walk with the Lord.

I wish we could be friends. I wish I could go over to her house for coffee and just glean from her. I wish she could come to our Monday morning Mommy times and share with us all of the things that she has learned from walking this journey and being down the road a little farther than us. But alas, it is not meant to be. Instead, I'll just have to read her blog every day and pretend that we're fabulous friends and tell everyone else about her!

Anyway, one of her posts that she had written quite awhile ago has always stuck with me, and I was reminded of it again when I had the privilege of watching a dear friend's three month old baby today. This baby was a little doll today - nearly perfect. There were only three somewhat intense moments of her crying pretty hard and me learning how she needed to be soothed. But, Mister Man, those few minutes took me smack dab back into what my life was like nineteen months ago when My Little Screamer entered my world. The first six months of this little guy's life are months that I will be happy to not have to repeat. They were intense. Many tears all around!

That's the jist of this post and the reason why I love it so much. It's all about remembering.

Remembering the super intense moments that take place all throughout the various stages of childrearing. And then, not only remembering these moments but also empathizing with our friends as we see them walk down those same roads with their babies.

Empathizing is far different than sharing unsolicited advice. Empathizing is different than joking about how it can only get worse! Empathizing is different than patronizing. Empathizing is coming alongside our sisters and walking the road with them. It's loving and accepting no matter what. It's not judging. It's bearing their burdens with them. I am blessed to have friends who do that for me. And it's what Christ does with all of us on a daily basis!

Anyway, read this post. It rocks. This is how I want to be encouraged by other moms. And this is how I want to be an encouragement to them.

Pooch Pops


I came across this cute little cookie recipe the other day in Family Fun Magazine. This is seriously one of the coolest resources for finding fun kid recipes, crafts, and really fun and creative ideas.

Anyway, we tried it, and it was really easy and the kids loved it. Granted, most of the cookies didn't come out looking like puppies, and I ended up not using the popsicle sticks, but they were still pretty yummy. Behold! A masterpiece!



POOCH POPS

2/3 cup all-purpose flour (I would use 1/3 next time. It made them a little dry)
1 roll refrigerated sugar cookie dough
2 TBlsp. unsweetened cocoa powder
8 lollipop sticks
2 TBlsp. mini chocolate chips
1 tube vanilla decorating frosting (not really necessary - just shove the candy into the dough)
24 brown and/or red M&M's - (or whatever candy you have. Jesse kept eating all the M&M's, so we ended up using different chips)!

1. - Preheat oven to 350. Line 2 cookie sheets with parchment paper. Knead flour into cookie dough until smooth. Divide dough in half. Knead cocoa powder into one half until smooth.

2. - Roll out vanilla and chocolate cookie doughs until they're barely 1/4 inch thick. Cut out 8 hearts from each using a 3-inch cookie cutter. Place the vanilla hearts about 3 inches apart on cookie sheet. Insert a lollipop stick into each heart shape. Slice the chocolate hearts in half lengthwise. Place on either side of vanilla hearts as the ears. Press 6 mini chocolate chips, pointed side down, on each of the vanilla hearts for freckles. Use frosting to attach eyes and nose - or just shove them in.

3. - Bake until just golden, 10 to 12 minutes. Transfer cookies to wire rack and cool completely. Tie a ribbon on the lollipop stick, if desired. Makes 8.

On Savoring......

I came across an awesome post by someone this morning.

I love reading about other moms and their children.....their struggles, their lessons learned, their love for their babies. I love reminders to savor, reminders that childhood is fleeting, reminders that these - the right here and right now moments - these are the glory days. These are the moments to savor and to drink in. These days are not for wishing away. Not for waiting for life to slow down and for the crazyness to be over.

These days are about CHOOSING to slow down. choosing to stop. to listen. to get down on my babies' level and to look them straight in their eyes and to truly see them. Clean floors don't matter. Piled high laundry will eventually get folded and put away. Dishes will get washed.......




And my chilren will grow and one day be gone....and then I'll have all the time in the world for that other stuff.

Jesus teach me. Remind me. Show me how fleeting this moment of motherhood is. Help me love as You do. To see my children through Your eyes.

To savor.

I Want to be a Bezalel!

I had never heard of Mr. Bezalel before yesterday, but now he's my new fave and I love him! Might even want to name my next boy after him. (Big joke - Kev would never go for it).

I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study - a first for me - entitled "A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place," and I really really love it. She's taking us through the building of the Tabernacle in the Wilderness, and yesterday's lesson was all about this guy named Bezalel.

Bezalel was nothing out of the ordinary - just like me - but he was chosen by God because he was available and because he was obedient. Back in Old Testament days, before Pentecost, the Holy Spirit descended on only a handful of people - for a period of time - and these were mostly leaders, prophets, elders...basically "important" people. In all the list of those important few who were filled by the Spirit, Bezalel was the only one who was not a leader or a prophet. He was just a wage earner....a blue-collar guy. Nothing special. Yet, he was the only one in Old Testament history to be filled and empowered by the Holy Spirit to construct the Tabernacle. Super cool. Just a regular dude.

The name Bezalel means "in the shadow of God." This guy was not on a power trip or craving recognition. He was perfectly happy to dwell in the shadow of the Almighty! God's name was enough for him, and he considered it a privilege just to work on God's team.

This is so awesome! And so unlike me, I'm afraid. I too often love and crave the accolades and the recognition. I like the spotlight way too much. But, I so badly want to just simply be happy and content serving and loving Jesus....content to live in His shadow.

Okay. Here's where the lesson hit home for me.

God empowered this man for an assignment that was WAY out of his league......hmmmmm.....somewhat like motherhood for me...., and He did this ON PURPOSE! He purposely assigned Bezalel a task beyond his capability so that God could fill him with His power.

Motherhood IS completely out of my league - raising my kids to love Jesus, helping them to become young men of character, etc. etc. Anything and everything of priority in the Kingdom is waaaaay out of my league! BUT THAT'S SO GOOD! I need to remember that God has me in a position way beyond my capability so that I will be at His absolute mercy, realizing that only He can succeed.....never me - especially in my own strength.

Sincerity and sweat will never suffice! Good intentions will always result in failure.

God wants to raise my boys to be godly men THROUGH me. He doesn't want ME to do it! He wants me to simply let Him do His job through me as a completely open and willing vessel. If I can stop to remember that I work for Him - and not the other way around - with my assignment will ALWAYS come the guarantee that I will be equipped for the job. It is ONLY through Christ that I will be an effective mother, wife, friend, woman!

He promises to equip me "for the work of service" to the building up of [my boys]. (Ephesians 4:12) He measures grace to me (Ephesians 4:7), and He promises that when I am in His Word and have His Word being lived through me that through Him, I will "be adequate, thoroughly equipped for every good work!" (II Timothy 3: 16,17)

That's a promise that I will cling to! Just call me Mrs. Bezalel......

Out of the Blue!

All of a sudden....

in the past couple of days, Kaden has discovered that he can write a whole whack of letters AND draw REAL pictures! This may not sound overly amazing to you, but it is the absolute coolest thing in my book to watch him literally go from one day drawing scrawly lines and squiggles to the next day writing letters and drawing real pictures!!!

He was just scrawling out a "picture" like he always does, and he looked down and said: "Hey! That's looks like an 'A'!" and it was like a lightbulb turned on inside his little head and something just clicked. He suddenly realized that he could write letters ALL BY HIMSELF! And now he's exploding with letters and asking me how to spell words right and left!




And then -

he was coloring with Grammy last evening, and he watched her create her own "real" picture, and it was like watching another lightbulb go on. And now - he's drawing pictures of trees and houses and suns and alien looking people....but they're real, honest to goodness PICTURES!

LOOK!!!




Amazing.

Not My Week......

OH. MY. WORD.

Somehow.....Someway.....in trying to add a new link to my "Good Things" Links on my sidebar, I deleted every blasted link over there - including that whole section! Seriously, I am concluding that I absolutely am unable to multi-task anymore.

Sooooo, if anyone can remember what I even had over there....or maybe some nice suggestions of things that I could add now, that would be fabulous. Even better, if there was some miraculous way that I could get them back, that would be awesome, too. Thanks.

Fantastic.

Yesterday......


Betty Crocker, I was NOT!!!

Holy Cow!!! Every single thing that I put my hands to bombed...ROYALLY!

We have a Mom's get together every Monday morning. I thought it would be fun to make some gingersnap cut-out cookies with the kids, so the older two helped me whip up the batter really quickly. I was rushing, and trying to multi-task, and misread the recipe BIG time! There was a grease spot on the ingredient amounts, and I mistook 1 teaspoon of baking soda and instead read 6 TEASPOONS! Holy nastiness!!

And the funny thing is, I didn't even notice until everyone had left and I had sent cookies home with the kidlets. I sat down and tried a bite of one for myself and just about died from the bitterness! In hindsight, I don't think any recipe that I have EVER made has called for six teaspoons of baking soda! Ha!

And then - later in the afternoon I was trying to make supper with my crabby younger son who had just awakened from his nap WHILE talking on the phone with a long lost friend who never updates her blog so I can't ever really catch up on her life...ahem...hint hint. So, needless to say, I was focusing more on our conversation rather than the recipe, and instead of putting curry in, I put in cumin - which KILLS my husband's stomach, by the way! Once I realized, I shook a whole bunch of curry on top of that, added a little honey for sweetness, and chucked it onto the table!

And in that moment, I decided that I was done in the kitchen for the day.

I LOVE......



:: these boys
:: this day
:: my life

Snow Day!


Snow is falling around these here parts - not too hard yet, really, but our church still cancelled for the day. We were actually the ONLY ones in the area to cancel! Kinda' funny.

We were all bundled and at church by 7:45 before the decision was made. It was actually closer to 9:00 by the time all details were wrapped up and we were able to head home, so we spontaneously called some friends and decided to go out to breakfast on our way. Tons of fun!

I love having days like this.

Usually our Sundays are so crazy - we practically live at the church all day. I actually don't mind that at all, and I love our new church family. But, this kind of feels like a snow day cancellation from school. You get all revved up for a busy day and then find out that you get to stay home all nice and cozy with your family! I love that! We're going to go out and play in the snow a little later and then maybe make some cut-out cookies together.

It's really been a nice week-end. It's felt like a mini vacation in a way. A good balance between errands and projects that have waiting to be done and also lots of vegging and family time and play. Love that.

Happy snowy day to the rest of you! May it be filled with cozyness, hot chocolate, and some fun family moments! And maybe even a nap!

Baby, It's Cold Outside!


Wow! Is it ever cold out today! No one's car in the parking lot would start this morning, and my nostril hairs kept sticking together. Good times.

We're finding it somewhat difficult to think of ideas of what to do on our family days when it's so blasted frigid out. Hubby is one who likes to get out and about and doesn't really love sitting still for long, so we almost always go somewhere on our Fridays together. But, usually we drive somewhere so that we can be outside....and man - that's been hard to do! Any ideas?

Pre-kids, we would have hightailed it to the coast, even to just get out for a couple of minutes. But, that's not fun for the boys - especially Jesse who hates to be belted in even for a 30 second drive to church. They need to be able to get out and RUN if they're going to be driving for a trip anywhere. It's too cold for hikes or sliding...or maybe we've just gotten too wimpy. I'm not sure. We just hate being cooped up inside all day. All three boys start jumping off the walls!

So, we ran a couple of errands and then went to the mall and let them run around and play there. I'm so not a mall Mom, but it's fun once in awhile. Especially when treats are involved.

Now I'm sorting through a plan of attack for fun crafty ideas and things to do inside during these freezing cold days of yuck. I've got some ideas rolling around that I'll share if they're successes. We made some pretty fun homemade playdoh yesterday. Easy sneezy. For each kid: 1/4 cup salt and 1/2 cup flour. Let them stir that all around in a huge bowl. In another bowl add 1/4 cup warm water and let them have at it with making their own color out of food coloring. (Obviously, help the wee ones on this step. Jesse tried drinking his when I wasn't paying attention. Ahem). Mix all together and go to town with cookie cutters, feathers, toothpicks...whatever! Slightly messy, but good for about an hour of entertainment. It's worth it!

Before laying Kaden down to nap we had a cute little conversation, today. I said, "Kaden, do you know how much Mommy loves having you two boys?" He said: "Yeah. And you get to have THREE boys! How lucky are you?!!!"

Super blessed, Buddy.

Plan for the Joy

Nothing amazingly profound to report from my own lips today. Just wanting to share some tidbits from a couple of blogs that I read who are farther down the journey of motherhood than I and who are thus, much wiser than I about what is important and lasting in life and child-rearing.

A Mom of twelve writes:

* * * * * * * * * *
"Have you heard? Life is fleeting. Time is deceptive. The days are evil. That’s right, I said evil. In other words, the days are crafty little buggars. They lull you into a false sense of security, of feeling like nothing will ever change, and all the while…it is. Antique Mommy’s post here was yet another reminder to slow down, enjoy the moment, and most importantly, to plan for joy in our everyday moments. She does not advocate trying to fabricate joy, but to simply expect it. To be ready for it.

To have eyes to see it.

There are pearls in these days of ours. Pearls straight from God’s hand in the form of sunrises and sunsets, gentle breezes and fierce storms, clamoring voices and bubbling laughter, messes and mishaps. Is it possible that the irksome interruptions that derail me from my goals are themselves the goals instead? Too often I am the sow trampling those pearls of opportunity under my feet: unthinking, unappreciative…unwilling.

You’ve heard all this before. So have I. Taking our lives for granted is a priviledge only possible for a small percentage of the world’s population, and I’m part of that. I don’t want to be guilt-ridden, I just want to do better. And so I’ll keep saying it, if for no other reason than to remind myself to pull my head out of the mire.

Because someday, instead of mindlessly mucking about in the feed trough, I want to spy the pearls that are right in front of me. I want to pluck them up out of the mud, polish them, and string them on cords of gratitude to the One who scatters them with such indiscriminate liberality".

* * * * * * * * * *

Another AWESOME and oh-so-real post about discovering joy in the journey can be found over here by another busy Mommy of many who gets it.

We're all on this journey of motherhood and life together. No one ever said it would be easy; in fact - we should expect it to be hard.....because Satan wants us to fail! But we need to savor these years and these moments, we need to drink them in, because they are fleeting, and before we know it - they'll be gone!

Lord, help me to discover the joy in the mundane....to slow down the "tyranny of the urgent,"......and to plan for the joy in the everyday moments of this life that You have given me! Give me Your Joy - complete and overflowing, and may it spill over onto all who come in contact with me......

Frustrating!

Wow....gotta love apartment life. I just wrote a whole post, and we lost our signal here so everything got lost. Fantastic. Okaaaay, learning patience here. Anyway.....

We've had a nice weekend. It seems to have taken us a long time to find our groove here. Longer than we thought it would. Kev has always had one day off a week - for which we are all so very thankful. I know that we are blessed and that not everyone is able to have that gift. Usually on this our family day, we hightail it somewhere - anywhere - for a fun family day. But, I think we have only done this one time in the past three months. Very bad.

Anyway, we decided that yesterday we needed to get back into our rhythm, and we kicked it to our most fave coffee shop down in Camden. Kev and I love this place so much, that we don't even think twice about the hour (plus) time it takes to get there! It's a very funky and eclectic place that has awesome food and pastries, and really yummy organic coffee. We have yet to try something that we don't absolutely love - and we are coffee shop prissies! So, we went there for lunch and then walked next door to one of our favorite kid stores. This place had a train table set up for kids to play at as well as a fun little kitchen area. Jesse filled his pants while we were there, so we played until he stunk up the ENTIRE place, and then we hightailed it out of there. Good times, good times.

Yesterday I had one of my cleaning/culling urges. Kev and Kaden ran errands in the morning while Jesse and I cleaned and did laundry, and then during naps Kev and I reorganized our life that's in the attic storage. We managed to fill three trash bags and three yard sale boxes, so the clutter of my life seems lightened considerably. I hate stuff.

In other news, Jesse took a face plant off one of our waist high chairs yesterday. He took a diving, face planting leap out of his pack and play at church today. And I fell on the way to the car while holding him this morning and gave him a massive whip lash! If he makes it until two, I will be amazed!!

My 300th Post!

Holy Canolli! Who would've known I would have so much to say that I've reached my 300th post?.....Ahem....don't answer that! :0)

So, I've been thinking a lot about this whole world of blogging lately. Mostly because of my last post, I guess, and because of friends who have posted similar things on their blogs.....and because of many recent conversations with friends.

And I think this whole blogger world is an awesome thing, to be sure.

The whole reason why I originally created a blog was to keep in contact with my friends from Maine while living in Philly. And now I do it not only to stay in daily/weekly touch with them but also with my frieds that we left behind in Philly! This sort of thing works really great for me because I'm not a real lover of the phone, but I do love to just kind of pop into people's lives (blogs) and see what's going on with them every few days.

However.....I think blogs are kind of like a "pseudo-life" that in many ways aren't totally REAL. Well, they are real to an extent....but they don't really show the true day to day lives of each of us....which can lead to people thinking each other's lives are maybe something more than they really are. Are you following me? :0) What I mean is, I tend to only post when I feel like I have something worthwhile to say, or when we did something that was worth posting - like something funny or cute or family oriented. I don't post about the mundane or the more bummer of days - especially in the moment. Because, in the moment, I don't feel like doing ANYTHING, let alone post something on a numb blog. Or if I DO post about them - it's when they are already said and done, so they don't look nearly as bleak as they did in the moment.

So, maybe certain people's blogs portray them as being totally exciting, or having perfect families, or always on the go and up for anything, or always painting and coloring and baking and doing crafty things with their kids - when REALLY they maybe only do that once a week and they chose that particular day to post. You know what I mean?

For example, I didn't write about Kaden and I hurling our cookies all day on Monday because I thought I'd spare people the juicy details. Nor did I write about how we all sat around in our p.j.'s and watched t.v. ALL day the next day because I didn't want people to judge me! :0) And there are other days where all I did was laundry, dishes, and made supper. Nothing to get up in the night and rave about - let alone post about. You get my drift?

So, I am going to try to find the balance of being totally real and "in the moment" about everything and anything and have my blog really and truly portray who I am, but also spare the oh so many boring details of our lives, as well...which happens more often than not!

Thus endeth my rambly post! Happy Thursday, everyone!

Okaaaaay........Want to Play a Game?

I just got off of the phone with a friend who shall remain anonymous, but I just want you to know - dear friend - that this one is for you! You are the second person in the span of a few weeks here who has commented on the "peppy-ness" of my blog and, I believe the question of: "How come you are always so happy?" also came about in said conversation a few times.

I scan a few blogs where all that I read is perpetual sunshine and rainbows and butterflies and to be quite frank - I find them sickening, and they drive me absolutely CRAZY! Whenever I read these blogs, I feel like gagging from the oh so perfect gloriousness of these people's lives, and they by no means encourage me or brighten my day in ANY shape of the imagination...and I find it hard to believe that nothing EVER goes wrong in their lives and that they don't ever struggle.

Sooooo, if my blog is one of those kinds of blogs - by all means - shoot me right now! Generally - I really do love my life, and I am a happy person, overall - but BY NO MEANS am I sunshine and butterflies all day every day. It has never been my intention to come across this way in my writing. In fact, I have been trying to be more intentional about writing about ALL things in my life - the good, the bad, AND the ugly.

I know that we all struggle with things - some of us are just better at hiding these things than others, and it's super hard to be vulnerable...especially with people who seem to have life all together and tied up in a pretty bow all the time. I don't want to be one of those people. If I have done that, I am going to clear up a few things right now. Settle in, because this post is a long one. But, I just want to share a small sampling - a tiny tidbit - of the things that I am currently struggling with and, by God's grace, working through.

I'll call it - Amy's Top Ten Current Things of Yuck, and I'm just going to lay it all out there - no excuses, no nothing.

1. I think about my personal appearance more than I should. Since we've moved home I've gained ten pounds. Not sure how or when it happened, but it's somewhat all consuming and frustrating to me; and it's all I can seem to think about.

2. Whenever I go to certain friend's homes and see their creativity or things that I want or their lack of toys and stuff everywhere or their Suzy Homemaker abilities, I have to constantly fight the urge to not be ungrateful and to not covet. Kev can tell when I've been visiting them just by my attitude - I can become a completely different person and all of a sudden hate my home and all things in it instantly!

3. Kaden did not have a stellar Christmas in the "thankfulness department." This entire holiday I had to constantly remind him to thank the gift giver, to not compare what he got to others, to be happy with what he was given, and to actually LOOK at the present before tossing it to the side. Many moments of feeling like a failure here and of being embarassed......and not necessarily for the right reasons, either. I wanted him to act appropriately, so that people would see what a great kid he is.....so that in turn - they would think what a great mom I am.

4. I like the spotlight. I like accolades. When someone else gets them instead of me, I get jealous. (Nice, eh?)

5. There are MANY days (and often many moments within said days) where I could bonk my kids' heads together and promptly throw them out the window! In the four years that I have been a mother, I have never cried more in my life or felt more lonely or like a failure in EVERY area of my life. Half of the time I don't have a clue what I'm doing, I don't feel like I'm doing a good job, and I feel like everyone around has "it" completely together and never struggles with ANYTHING!

6. I am a people pleaser. I worry far more about what people think of me and my home and my mothering and my family and my LIFE than of what THE LORD thinks of any of those things.

7. Kaden and I are very different in our personalities. He is shy and timid and slower than death on stilts, and he needs things explained to the 9th degree......and I am not. I have to constantly reign myself in from constantly being short with him just because he handles life differently than me! I want to let him be HIM, but sometimes it's hard! And Jesse has me eating humble pie every day - he has had phases of biting, hitting, screaming, throwing, and all said things put together at once....and often in public!

8. Sometimes I crave "life before kids." I enjoyed working, I loved my independence, and I loved my home neat, sparse, and organized! In the darkest depths within me lies a career woman who could potentially leave my family in the dust for the lure of the spotlight and "things of importance" that can be measured by the world's standards. I know in my heart of hearts that what I am doing is of utmost importance in the Lord's eyes and that it is my highest calling, and MOST often I really am living my dream in being able to stay home with them....but there are days....just so you know.

9. I compare, compare, compare. And I don't compare myself to the Lord's standards, but I compare myself to everyone around me. When I look at myself through the lens of other's lives I see that I don't play enough with my children, I'm not creative enough with them, I shouldn't be so excited for naptimes, I'm not structured enough....or maybe I'm too structured, I enjoy being away from them more than I should....or maybe I'm too protective and don't leave them enough, I worry too much about the neatness of my home, I need to have a huge family if I'm a good Christian, don't I?, homeschool or regular school....and on and on and on. I could go crazy if I let myself.

10. Up until just last month, my quiet time with the Lord ROTTED, and was sporatic at best. I am just getting back into the routine that I think He is pleased with along with the right motivation behind WHY I am having my quiet time. And the reason why (I am reminded afresh and anew - almost every day it seems -) is that I desperately need Him and His wisdom and grace. I am a hopeless failure without Him!

So, there you have it. Real pretty, eh?

Did that encourage anyone?
Can anyone else relate?......Anyone else want to play?

Happy New Year!

Hubby is sleeping in this morning, the boys are dancing around in their new matching p.j.'s, and I'm snagging a few minutes on this new morning in the new year to write a bit. When I was writing our Christmas letter, I was once again struck by just how much can happen in the span of one little year. I find the saying, "the days are long, but the years are fleeting," to be especially true when I look back over the span of a few months!

In 2008 we were living in Philly, we were students, our baby had surgery, somehow he became a toddler, somehow Kaden turned four, we celebrated nine years of marriage, we graduated, we moved back to our roots, we lived in two different places, Kev got a new job, we have a new church, and now.... we're in a new year! Insane.

I wonder what 2009 will hold for us?

Life is such a crazy adventure, and I like to hope that I'm up for anything. We'll see what the Lord has in store for us. Another baby? (Nothing to report. I just don't feel that our family is complete as of yet). Another move? (Oh Lord. That might not be my favorite right now! I'd be content to stay here for a few more months, at least). Homeschooling or Christian School? (If we go the Christian School route - we need to decide Kindergarten at five or Kindergarten at six? We're pretty sure we're going to wait until he's six. We're just really praying about the "where" and the "what" right now). Yikes. And who knows what else will take place?

As my kids grow, I am often floored and overwhelmed at the responsibility that I have before me, I get almost panicky at how fast time seems to be flying, I feel filled to overflowing with love and thankfulness at the gift that I have been given in them, and I feel completely inadequate, often frazzled, very blessed, and most generally happy and content! It's a good life, and it's been a good year.