Him and Me.

So, there's this man I married almost fourteen years ago...
And fell in love with almost seventeen years ago...
And met for the first time almost eighteen years ago...

It happened in Bridal....I mean, Bible...School.

Him - already committed to a girl back home.
And me - still pretty jaded over a four year relationship gone horribly wrong.

Him - the strong and silent type.
Me - the loud and rowdy one.

Him - really preferring not to be noticed, not to be signaled out, and not to be spotlighted.
(Kind of like what I'm doing right now).
Me - completely fine puking my life out for all the world to see and hear about - with no inhibitions whatsoever.
(Again.  Kind of like I'm doing right now.  Ahem).

Both with baggage.  Both with scars.
Both with past hurts and still raw pain.
But, both in love with Jesus.

And so when we both decided to go on this crazy missions trip halfway around the world during the summer after our freshman year of school....and when we both found out that we were the only ones from our entire school going on this trip...and when our school was in Canada, but we were both Americans - and both from Maine, no less...it just made sense that we would meet up in the airport and fly to California to meet up with the rest of our team together.

Him - already the world traveler.
And me - the sheltered country girl, never having boarded a plane before in my life.

And from the get-go, my Mama always told me... "Go into this with an open mind, Love.  You never know what might happen between you and this Booker fellow."  To which I replied:  "Mom!!!  He doesn't even speak to me.  What in the world are we going to talk about for 22 flipping hours in the air together?!?!"

To which, she simply smiled...and when she sent me off with open hands and trusting faith into the wild unknown with a stranger, no less...she hugged him close - this boy-man - and she whispered fierce:  "You protect my girl."  And he, the ever serious one replied:  "You know I will....."

And quite honestly...the rest is history.
And Mama really does know best.
And he has, indeed, kept his promise well these fourteen years...

We are night and day, him and I.
Polar opposites really, in so many senses of the word.

But, our interests are the same...and we share the same dreams...and we love fiercely...and we fight for each other...and we make each other better...and we're not afraid to cry...or admit when we've made mistakes...and we're willing to take risks because we know we have each other's back...and we have eyes for no-one else...and we protect that promise that we made when I wore white and when he cried...when we were just babies starting out.....before all the job changes, and all of the moves, and all of the babies....before we knew what little bit that we know now...

Because that's what love is and that's what love does.
When you say yes, you close your eyes, and you hang on tight, and you go for the ride.
You go all in.
Him and you.

And when life throws you crap - because that's what life does...
And when plans don't turn out exactly that way you thought - because that's what "journey" is...
And when Satan comes like a thief in the night, and when he tries to steal your joy, and rip out your soul, and tear you apart - because that's his specialty...

And when life gets scary...
And when you can't see the forest for the trees...and you're not sure which way is up...
And when you have other little lives that you're suddenly responsible for...
And all of a sudden you realize that you're all grown up...and life is hard...and it's messy...and it's oftentimes more painful than not...

That's when we remember that "no man is an island."
And that's why we have each other.

That's when we step away from all of the spinning....and that's when we lock eyes, and we clasp hands...that's when we say "no" to all of that, and "yes" to all of Him...and us...and what He has for us.  And we shut out the screaming world and the lying whispers.

We assess and we re-assess --- all the while with three sets of little eyes looking on, learning, listening, remembering....and taking notes for the someday when they, too, will wear white and say "yes" --- and though you're so very far from perfect, you still hope that they have a love like yours someday, because it's real, and it's raw, and it's deep...

And we do our best to listen to the only Voice that has ever mattered in the first place...
And we take crazy steps forward in faith...
And we take "risks" because life is never a risk when you're walking with Jesus.

And we move places, and buy a house, and have babies, and sell a house, and we go back to college when we're thirty, and we have more babies, and we move some more, and we live in apartments, and we buy another house the night before a third baby is born, and we get chickens because he knows it makes me happy, and we say we'll live on peanut butter and jelly if we have to - but in the meantime we buy SO many groceries for crazy, hungry little boys, and we get sick, and we change jobs, and we step away, and we say "no" and we say "yes," and we morphe, and we change, and we grow...

And I'm not scared.  And I've never been scared.
Because of Almighty Him....and also because of the "him" whose name I share...

Him - always wearing that burden of responsibility.
And me - forever trusting, because I know him well.  And I know his heart.  And I know his Jesus trust.

Him - The gentle, tender Father - the true model of a man - without his own for all those years.
And me - The Fearful - knowing that now I'll have a daughter who will watch and model after me.

Him - the perceptive one.  Who knows me better than I know myself...
And me - willing to follow to the Ends of the Earth.


And we do life.  Year after year.
The day in and the day out.
The mundane and the madness.
Day after day after day....

And we do it together.
And that's what makes it awesome.

"Love is life." ~ Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace

#4262. ~ Fourteen years of LIFE with my best friend.

#4263. ~ Learning, growing, and changing together.

#4264. ~ Commitment and unconditional love.

#4265. ~ Integrity and honor.

#4266. ~ Journey with Jesus - and a husband who walks close.

#4267. ~ Depth of faith, honesty, and vulnerability - much strength in much tenderness.

#4268. ~ A man whom I want my sons to model after.

#4269. ~ Laughing til we cry.

#4270. ~ Crying til we laugh.
#4271. ~ Not knowing where one of us ends and where the other begins...
~ My Joy Journey

Happy Hearts Day, My Love...just a few days early.
Thank you for wanting me.
And thank you for loving me well...