Life with my Joys: November 2012

Journey.

I have scrapbooks for all of my babies to give to them one day. Love gifts from their Mama. Books that are all about them and totally for them - from their Mama for when they leave home someday.

But, this here blog journal of mine? Well, this will be theirs to have one day, as well - another love gift from their Mama. But, this one is more about me - and my journey. The whole original idea behind this blog space was to have a day by day, month by month, year by year - what have you - record of the days of their Mama and her journey as a woman, a wife, a mother, and a lover of Jesus.

It's a place where hopefully all of my children will be able to look back one day - and as they read the road map of our lives as a family - they'll be able to trace the fingerprints of God all the way through. They will be able to see our muddling, baby steps as parents, our relationship as a couple, and our journey with Jesus as we have tried our best to listen to Him, to hear His still small voice, to walk with Him, and to follow His leading in the best way that we have known how to do - all the while having three small pairs of young little eyes looking on.

Very humbling. Scary, even. And the depth of responsibility that we feel with each successive child that we bring into this world and with each new chapter in this journey of Life that we live can sometimes feel a bit daunting. We're not just responsible for the two of us anymore...we have a whole passel of kids along for the ride, as well.

But you know what? More than anything, I want them to see that no matter what - their Mommy and Daddy loved Jesus, and we loved each other, and we loved them. Regardless. Regardless of life around us. Regardless of our bumbling mistakes. Regardless of anything. And I want them to see that we weren't afraid to say we were sorry. And we weren't afraid to admit our mistakes. And we were willing to take risks. And we were willing to step out in faith when others thought we were crazy. And we stood by each other's side no matter what.

I want them to see what a living faith looks like. A humble walk with Jesus that doesn't have all of the answers and doesn't pretend to. A vulnerable relationship that tries to block out the clamor of the world around us and really tries to hear. And a journey where we try to get out of the way of ourselves and remember that it's all about Jesus in the first place, anyway.

Because all along - God is always faithful. He always comes through. And He always provides exceedingly, abundantly above and beyond anything that we could ever ask for or imagine. He is good; and He is trustworthy. Always, and no matter what.

And so....in recent weeks and months, as we have felt Him preparing us, yet again, for another chapter - another "season" - in our lives.... we have tried to remember and recount God's faithfulness and provision all along the way. We often joke that God has us on a three to five year plan before we get moved onto something different. I feel like we're nomads sometimes. But really....that is what we are, is it not? This isn't our home. We're strangers here....

How often I can forget when I get comfortable.

So, for about 3+ years now, God has made us increasingly un-comfortable. We have been questioning and challenging so many thoughts that have been ingrained as "truth" into our brains. By who - I don't really know. It's just what we kind of intrinsically believed. We used to believe that if you were really and truly "sold out to Jesus" then you went to a Bible college or seminary and became a pastor or a missionary for the rest of your days. We used to think that only those in "full-time vocational ministry" were the ones who were "the called." We used to be surrounded only by fellow believers - secure in our bubbled worlds of Christianity - so much so, that there was a time when I couldn't even count on one hand friends that I had who didn't know Jesus. I used to think that "avoiding the appearance of evil" was a far loftier goal than maybe getting my hands dirty a bit and walking alongside someone whose life looked a whole lot messier than mine.

I used to think Jesus was safe.
I used to think that He fit into a neat little box.
That made me comfortable. And it made me feel good about myself.

But, He has made us increasingly restless - and after thirteen years of "full-time vocational Christian ministry," He has made it clear to us that now is the season to step away from that and begin to live out and practice what we have been preaching to the choir for the past three years. And, just like Abraham, He told us to "move" before He showed us our next step. His kids - the ones who have a back-up plan for their back-up plans, and the ones who have a mortgage, student loans, and a fourth baby on the way - put in our resignation with our missions organization, but with no Plan B in sight.

But like His track record has always proven, God came through.
And, first thing in the new year, my husband will be working full-time as a Home Mortgage Consultant with Wells Fargo. Crazy stuff. A whole new chapter. A whole new season.

But that's what journey is all about.

Thanks for taking the ride with us, sweet boys.
Thanks for placing full faith in your Mama and your Daddy.
And thank you for the life lessons for us on how we need to freely and fully trust our Abba Father.
Always, and no matter what....

'Tis the Season.

It Begins...

Well, seeing as how I napped away most of my Fall ~ it really has no choice but to begin. Post Haste.

But, this is the part of the Pre-Christmas Holiday that I absolutely love. Crafting and creating little labors of love for the people that are most special to me.

This year involves a bit of wood, some jig-sawing, some cork, some birch bark, some grating, and some royal freezing of my buns off in the cold to do some of my gift prepping and collecting. That part I don't particularly love so much. But, the making and the gifting along with the Christmas music and the little hands so eager for helping? LOVE it.

Hmmm. OH what could this be?
I'll never tell...
For you may find it beneath your very own TreeEEeeeee!!!

And this year we are going waaay simple. Partially out of necessity, but equally out of desire. Simple in the gift giving and also very simple in the Holiday prep. I tend to go big or go home...but I'm learning that rather than just "go home" ~ why not keep it simple and at least be able to follow through?

So, for us...at least for this year....instead of doing a grand advent calendar like I had planned in my head, we made this:

Yup.
It's a paper chain where the kids will take turns ripping off one ring a day to count down to the big day.

Awesome. But, do you know what? They love it, and they don't care that it's lame. And instead of trying to read through three different Advent books at the same time, I've picked just one - (that I made through about three chapters of last year before I petered out, by the way) - and we're sticking with that. One chapter a day at breakfast. And each boy, at each of their age levels, will get whatever takeaway they get.

It's called "Jotham's Journey" and it's a beautiful, action packed, chapter story book specifically written to prepare little boy's hearts for Christmas. And they love it. AND they reminded me that we started it last year, "but we never finished it, Mama...." Yup. Awesome. So, here goes round two.

Oooh - la la! It smells delish?
Oh, what could possibly go in this dish?

Sorry....

So, yes. Paring down. Embracing simplicity. Trying to slow and savor.
And my babies are still at the easiest, sweetest ages where Christmas is just so special and so much fun no matter what we do. I think we're the ones who put the crazy amounts of pressure on ourselves to make it perfect and over the top awesome each year. Or maybe that's just me....

But, I am learning. And I'm definitely learning my weaknesses and my limitations. I have grand plans and schemes, but if I can't follow through with them, well, it kind of defeats the purpose and it would have been better to just start out simple in the first place.

Here's an example: I totally almost dropped the ball on Operation Christmas shoe boxes this year. It's our first time doing it - because I always blow by the time for collection and gathering treasures. But THIS year, I said was the year. We pooled our money, the kids donated too, we shopped together, we made up fun little boxes.....and there they sat on my counter for days. And days. And days.

Until the day AFTER collection when I went into full blown panic mode and had Kev drive clear across town to literally put them on the back of one of their huge U-Hauls as they were getting ready to pull out of town. Awesome.
Joy to the world.

So, I'm growing.
I'm learning.
Big baths of grace, baby...

And thanks to my dear friend, Rachael D., and my three future daughters-in-law, ever since MY boys saw that they each have their very own Christmas trees in their very own bedrooms...well, that has become their new favorite tradition. Here, they can decorate it themselves, wrap their very own Christmas gifts, and plan their very own Christmas parties. So, we walked out back, we chopped a wee tree, and we stuck it in a bucket.

Easy enough.
Joy to the world.
Here's to embracing it ALL.....

Thanksgiving Recap.

A Wee Holiday Review:

Well, the festivities are over, the ten pounds have been gained, we feasted and we celebrated, we went over the river and through the woods to Grandmothers...and now we're back home again. But, before we jump over into full blown Christmas mode, I just want to briefly recap this Thanksgiving's Holiday and give it the memory that it is due...

The boys and I made our annual pilgrim hats and crazy turkeys. I didn't have half of the ingredients that I was supposed to have, so we raided our left over Halloween candy and made due with what we had. It's the silly tradition that means the most to them...

We made our crazy hand turkeys to give out to family and friends...

And Mrs. Preggo Mama left them right on the counter...

Awesome.

And we hosted Grampy, Grammy, and sweet crazy little Great Grammy for the day. Our house was full, our table was crowded, the noise level was a touch to loud for the Elders, and we ate way too much food, but it was lovely. Sweet and simple with hearts full of thanks. It was perfect.

And for the festivities ~ we played Bingo while we watched the Macy's Day Parade, we also played a different silly Bingo game to see who got to go through the dessert line first; and in an attempt to make everyone upchuck their entire lunches, we played Pin the Hat on the Turkey and gave every one a good ten spins to get those belly juices flowing...

I confess, I almost hurled.

And to top the weekend off, we kicked it up North to see my side of the family. We won't all be together for Christmas, so we had just a couple of days getting into the Christmas spirit together playing games, being crazy, watching Christmas movies, making cookies with Grammy, giving sweet baby nephews tons of kissing, a last little bit of hunting, some venison jerky making, and just some all around love-o-ly Thanksgiving festivus making. A gloriously, exhausting, belly-filling, family filled, jammed packed Holiday weekend, indeed.

And NOW....all things Christmas-y may come...in ALL of their glory!
We have flipped the switch, the Christmas carols are playing, the house is getting cozy, and we are READY!

Today.

They sit - all three - messy haired and lined up on the couch from tallest to shortest, quietly (for now) watching cartoons. He left while it was still black outside to go on his traditional Thanksgiving morning hunt with a friend, and I sit here in the darkness quietly sipping my coffee.

Before the rush of today begins, I am still. My heart is full of these gifts that are mine for now, and I give thanks.

For these four men and one within. The loves of my life.
For a warm home soon to be filled with family.
For the smells of yummy food bubbling on the stove breathing comfort and security.
For loved ones. For health. For new life within. For dear friends. For precious family.

And for a break from the rush of life - just for a day - to remind me to stop and to savor.
Really, for everyday gifts that I so often bulldoze right past.
But still, all grace. All on loan. Nothing I have earned - and surely nothing I deserve.
And gifts given nonetheless from a gracious Daddy who loves His kids wildly regardless of their responses to Him.

And there are moments like this one, where I am blown away by that kind of a love...

There will still be chaos today.
There will still be squabbles and epic messes, I am sure.
There will probably even be some burned food because of a potential catastrophe that had to be intervened upon.

But today is still different. It's out of the ordinary. Today we come together and we remember.

And I am thankful. Deeply thankful for what I have. For what I so often hold with iron-gripped fist but am always reminded to give over - and give up - with open hands and with willing heart. For things I take so flippantly for granted. And for things that I have never once been given the guarantee of having tomorrow. These are gifts for Today - for right now - alone.

So this morning in the stillness, I splay fingers open wide - held up to the One who is the Giver of all gifts in the first place... And with open heart and open hands I give thanks.

Abba Father.
Daddy.
Thank you. For everything.

Friday Show and Tell.

It's been a few days since a posting, so here's a little happy Friday post of nonsense.
I give you: "The Friday Show and Tell" around these here parts of Booker Land.

Exhibit A:
This is me in my 15th week.

Actually, this is me first thing in the morning. By evening, for some strange reason, I look like I'm going to give birth to twins...tomorrow. So, I like to take my pictures first thing in the morning after all of my cookies have settled, and preferably in black. I have no excuse for my backside. Well....maybe the cookies....

This picture is also for my Ohio friend, Rachel, who likes to mock my wardrobe preferences with its huge lack of selection and color. When she found out I was pregnant, this is the text that she sent me: "Just think! Now you get to wear your sexy black maternity shirt...and your other black maternity shirt...and your OTHER black maternity shirt." Point taken, dearest. I like black. It hides things...

It's also why I'm partially terrified if there is a wee young lady within my womb. I lack the girly genes.

Exhibit B:
This is what's hanging in my garage right now.
This is also what's for school today: Butchering, Biology, and Anatomy 101

Kevy's friend Brent helped us cut up our first deer, so we promised we'd return the favor if he got one this season. So, that's what we're doing today. And then Kevy got his second deer on Monday, so Brent is going to return the favor for us in a couple of days after our deer hangs for a bit. And Brent is still hunting, so we shall very likely return his favor and help him cut up another a few days after that....

I told the guys that they owe all of their amazing success to me. I knew it in my gut that Kev was going to get a deer this year, because I'm pregnant. Three out of my four pregnancies, I have been cutting up a deer during my first trimester of glory...and another deer I had a brand, brand new baby beside me. My philosophy is that their grand success is all due in part to my amazing hormones. That's my story, anyway...

Exhibit C:
This is my kitchen table during the entire week before Thanksgiving:

We are hosting Turkey Day this year, and we are all just a little bit excited about it. My kitchen is in a little bit of pain, and there will be beans and seeds lost and found forever throughout every room of my house because of our homemade decorations...but we're rolling with it. It is what it is.

Here's Kaden's turkey creation:

Neat, tidy, and according to directions.
Here's Jesse's:

Wild, crazy, with a bit of his own creation thrown in besides...along with his most favorite word to spell: BAD. Not sure why...

Exhibit D: This was Math yesterday:
Making cookies.....I mean, learning our measurements.

Okay, keeping it real....Mama was having a craving.

Exhibit E:
And this is my philosophy on life these days.....

Sip it.
Eat it.
Kiss it.
Snuggle it.
Love it up, Baby.
It's Friday...I'm in love.....

More Than Just a Pin. For Once.

Well, the entire months of September and October have sort of been lost on me. I think I pretty much slept them away, and now that I feel almost back to my old self - it appears that Thanksgiving is now upon us, with Christmas just around the corner -- and I have absolutely nothing to show for it.

Ah well. It is what it is.

I really do have pretty great pregnancies - right up until the very end when my kidneys sometimes don't cooperate - but I never get sick, and I'm rarely even nauseaus...so I am well aware that I have nothing to complain about. I have friends who are literally green for most of their forty weeks. Not sure if I would have ever dared attempt #4...or even #3 if I were in their shoes. Them's some brave women.

I just feel like I got run over by a Mack truck for about eight weeks and nap my life away. But, thankfully, the lethargy is leaving, and my get up and go has no longer got up and left me. It is slowly returning. So, last night, I decided to browse through all of the zillions of things that I half-heartedly pinned on Pinterest during my weeks of lounging, and thought that for the first time ever in my history of pinning things that I might just go ahead and do something with one of those many ideas.

Plus, the boys have been sick with wretched colds, and it was family day, and everyone had just been doping around all day doing nothing. So, when Daddy called home and said he was bringing back pizza and a movie, I figured I'd try and step up my game a bit too, and not have him be the only hero of the day in this here home!

These are the mini - 4oz, chubby jars. Chubby. Like me.

And thus was birthed our individual mini mason jar pies for dessert.
Super, super, over the top adorable...and not too shabby for taste either - considering I used canned filling.
Plus, it was really easy for all of the Littles to make their very own - with fairly minimal mess.

Blueberry filling. This brand had no high fructose corn syrup.

One could easily use pre-packaged pie crust, but here's a really easy and healthy homemade option:
I doubled it to make about 8 mini pies. That's how much this jar of pie made...
1 cup spelt flour
1 cup unbleached white - (using ALL white is obviously flakier. The spelt is just a bit more healthy)
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2/3 cup olive oil
8 tablespoons cold water

Roll out about half of your dough and use the top of your jar to make little pie toppers.

No need to roll out the rest. Just take little pieces and mold onto the bottom and up the sides of the rest of the jars. This part is super easy for the really little ones to help with. I just gave Ransom a big blob and let him have a hey-day with it while Kaden and I made up the rest.

Jesse just watched....and coughed all over everything. Awesome.
Poor kid. He tries. He just also forgets to try half of the time.
Blueberry Germ Pots. Mmmmmnnnnn.

Okay. Then you just take about a scant half cup of the filling and put it into your little pies.
Another time, I would make a really simple homemade filling with either apples or strawberries.
One of our favorites is to take a couple of bags of frozen strawberries that are thawed. Don't drain the juice, but add to it a half cup of pure maple syrup and three tablespoons of minute tapioca as a thickener. Stir is up, and you have a super healthy easy peasy pie filling.

And then! If you have any mini mini cookie cutters, cut a little shape in the middle of your pie topper, and place them on top of your little pots of delish. If you don't have any cutters, just make sure you poke a few holes in the top for venting. Otherwise, you shall have a glorious explosion in thine oven of oozing, sticky pie filling. I know this well. I speak from experience.

Or you could make a cute little lattice. Or a crumb topping. The sky's the limit, Baby.

With any remaining crust, I just do what my Mama always did and make little mini cinnamon rolls. Roll it out, sprinkle with cinnamon and sugar and bit of water, and roll 'em back up. I had a bit of frosting left over in my fridge from Lord knows how long ago, so I just drizzled the glaze over the top when they came out.

Seriously....how adorable are these?
I'm thinking little individual pies at each person's place setting on Thanksgiving.
Sweet, sweet.

Best served in the living room, during a family movie, whilst hanging out altogether.
And best also done whilst keeping eyes averted and choosing not to stress if crumbs and filling get all over your floor. No big deal, right?

So, there you have it. Easy and super cute.
I can now say that I have completed from start to finish - one and only one - pinning from Pinterest.
My life is now complete.