Thoughts on Motherhood

We had our first MOPS meeting this morning to kick off our new semester. I'm a table leader this year for a group of women. My responsibilities include: "facilitating discussion, being vulnerable with the women, listening without judgment, making them each feel loved, welcomed, validated etc. etc." I LOVE MOPS - I love what it offers to the women in our community, and I love how it refreshes my soul and reaffirms that what I am doing is oh so valuable and important in the eyes of the Lord.

It is so easy in gatherings such as these to observe and listen to other people's different styles of parenting and then to immediately come to a judgmental conclusion on their style of motherhood. There are definitly women who I have crossed paths with out here who I do not agree with some of the decisions they are making in their "style" of parenting. But then I think, "Well, if I feel this way about them, probably they are feeling the same way about my style!" Lesson learned, especially in this position that I have at MOPS: I don't want to be judged in how I am mothering, so I shouldn't judge anyone else! What I want is a friend who comes alongside me and walks with me in this journey of mothering. I want to be encouraged and affirmed - not judged and compared. Therefore, my goal in MOPS this year and in my friendships with young moms is to just really love them - regardless of our differences. I want to be a blessing - a breath of fresh air - to these women, so that when they leave my presence, whether it's at MOPS, out back doing laundry, or going to the park - we part ways with each other feeling more encouraged and built up in our womanhood and motherhood than we did before we got together.

The Lord is teaching me so many things these days. I think that my generation of moms, especially, can so easily get caught up in the things that are of lesser (is that a word?) importance in parenting, such as: structured naps and routines, watching the clock, making sure they know their ABC's at the appropriate age, breaking the will but not the spirit, proper etiquette at the table and in public etc. etc. I do think that these things are all important. I just sometimes feel that we can get so caught up in trying to accomplish these tasks that we forget to just relax and extend that extra measure of grace to both ourselves and our children and just really ENJOY our kids and enjoy living life with them!

I just want to truly and fully enjoy this season of life in every single way. I LOVE this stage that Kaden is in right now! He is carrying on full conversations, he is learning new things every day, he is understanding so many things, and he is just a little boy full of LIFE! I'm savoring this stage of toddlerhood. I'm seeing that my baby is gone - never to return - and in his place stands a little boy who very soon will be off to school, and it will not matter how long it took him to acquire certain skills, how he compared to others, and how "together" I came across to other young moms. I ultimately answer to the Lord alone for how I mother and nurture my children - as do all other moms. Nothing else matters.

The Lord has just been really helping me to slooooooow down and savor Kaden, and I am feeling so blessed and refreshed, as a result. I am loving life with Kaden, and I want to be an encouragement to other moms who are like me - who so easily get caught up in schedules, comparisons, and routines. This season is only for such a short time - I want to live it and love it to the fullest - putting all other things in perspective! What if he is the only child that we will ever be able to have? If that is the case, I will never regret not getting the dishes done or not getting him potty trained by summer's end like I had planned! I WILL regret if I didn't take the time to slow down and live life at his level and through his eyes. "Teach me to number my days, Oh Lord......"

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You impress me every time I read your blog...and I read it often, because I use it to get to Katie's blog! Thank you for being such an encouragement...to the ladies your age, to the younger women (coming up, like my girls), but also to the "old" ladies like me!--Debby

Anonymous said...

Hey, Ame...you've always been a bit of a novelist...very good at communicating..I love reading your blog -- and I look forward to reading your book/assignment when you complete it, on marriage. I wish we could be closer, sharing a coffee right now. I'm glad to catch up on your life from time to time, and glad you seem to be enjoying life. That's awesome! I hope to chat soon, dear friend. Hope you're having a fabulous day!!

Esther said...

Ame,
If Scott and I ever venture into the world of parenthood, I'm so thankful that I have such amazing mentors in motherhood such as you and Shan! You're inspiring and all the women at your table at MOPS are blessed to have you!