For Sale. One Small Child.

Now granted...we've only been parents for a little over eight years now, so that doesn't give us a lot of parenting history.  But, this weekend shall go down in the books as the most epic mess EVER made by one of our children thus far.

It was AH-mazing.

Let me paint the picture for you, if I may.  The big boys were outside playing, I had just put Sir Rancey Pants down for his afternoon nap (which, by the way, he is normally a marathon napper going 3+ and often 4 hours every afternoon), and I was elbow deep in the thick of making applesauce.

About an hour in, I noticed he hadn't fallen asleep yet - I could still hear him happily talking to himself.  While I was somewhat surprised that he was still awake - normally he instantly crashes - I didn't think much of it.  The boys were happily playing outside, I was happily making applesauce, and Ransom was at least "resting" happily.

All was bright and beautiful in my happy little world.
Well.

Cue end of naptime where I was rushing to wrap up my sauce, because I had just about an hour before I had to get ready for work.  I asked Kev if he would get Ransom out of his bed, and within 2 seconds of opening the bedroom door, Kev turns on his heels and walks back into the kitchen.  He looked at me and said:  "Um.  Okay.  You might want to bring your camera.  And prepare to not be impressed."

I hate statements like that.
Instantly I knew two things:
1.  This was going to be history in the making, and
2.  I was going to be SO not impressed.

Well, my camera I did bring.  But, let me just tell you that the pictures do not even BEGIN to do justice to the mess of epic porportions that had taken place in this child's bedroom.  Not only had he thrown everything out of his crib, he had thrown all of his clothes out of his baskets, and he had tossed all of his toys here, there, and everywhere.  But, that wasn't the worst of it.  Said child for sale had gotten his hands onto a brand new bottle of baby powder, and he had shaken out the entire contents all OVER his entire bedroom.  The floor was covered in about 1/4 inch of that fine white film.  All of the bedding had to be shaken out and washed.  All of his toys had to be taken outside and hosed down.  Every square inch had to be dusted, vaccumed, and then scrubbed.  And there was this white plume of dust that was slowly inching its way from his room out into the living room and the rest of my little house.

And the entire time we cleaned, he watched from his bed saying:  "Ho-wy cow."
Holy cow is right, batman.

On the bright side ~ his room got a nice little overhaul.
And it still has the lovliest essence of powder whenever you enter.
And I'm pretty sure it shall forevermore.
"There was never a child so lovely, but his Mother was glad to get him to sleep."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Just kidding on the for sale part.
Not so much on the happy to get him to sleep that night part.

4 comments:

Kristi said...

oh my soul - never a dull moment, is there? How-y cow. that's hilarious. you're a good mama, Ame...

Anonymous said...

Oh... My.... Word!!! That is one EPIC mess!! Ha ha ha! I love this! Your sense of humour with your little men is Amazing! And I'm sure very much appreciated by them all!

ann said...

even though i had already heard this story, i still laughed when reading it!!!! I agree, you have an amazing way with your children, you are such a wonderful example to moms of all ages:)

Emily said...

Holy Cow!!! I am impressed with the epic proportions of this mess. I am so glad it didn't involve poop....I was really scared that it was leading to something with poop ;)