Good-bye Joe.

It's early Monday morning, and I'm sitting here at my kitchen table with a steaming hot cup 'o joe.

Joe and I have decided that we're only going to keep our relationship to first thing in the morning every day. I had to break it to him gently. We used to visit each other all throughout the day and even into the evenings on some rare occasions. I LOVE Joe. He and I are tight.

But, a revolting development has taken place in this household.

You see, my husband still has some tummy issues. And despite getting almost completely rid of wheat and gluten products, and despite faithfully drinking his flax seed tea (which I lovingly call "phlegm tea" because it's so slimy), and despite drinking carrot and beet juice every day of his life and taking about as many supplements as someone in a nursing home would take, and despite saying good-bye forever to deep-fried fatty foods of deliciousness...the teeny tiny fact remains that his belly is still not totally up to par.

So, a couple of weeks ago, my man decided to go extreme.
He decided to pull off the boldest move in all of our married history.
A move so drastic, that I actually grieved the loss and thought the man had lossed his marbles.

Brace yourself folks, for if you know my husband, this will come as a total shocker.

My husband decided to cut off his love affair with coffee.
That's right. Their relationship is over. Just like that. Done. Kaput. Finis.
And he has moved on.

Please pause for a brief moment of silence as we mourn this great tragedy.

But the fact of the matter is that his tummy DOES feel better without all of that acid rolling around in there all day. And so, I feel that it's my responsibility to comfort and explain things to Joe. We meet every morning - just once a day now - and I tell him that I still love him, but I need to move on just a little bit, too. I could never totally give him up, but the truth is, it's more about just the cup of coffee. It's about the comfort and companionship it brings with two people drinking it together. So, now - when the mid afternoon urge for a warm beverage hits us - and when Kev revs up the steam machine to make himself a cup of chai tea with foaming milk and just a touch of nutmeg on the tippy top, I say: "Make it two, Kevy."

And I think Joe understands.