Simple Pleasures - Little Loves.

"Happiness is not a station you arrive at...but a manner of traveling." ~ Margaret Lee Runbeck. And I might argue the same for joy and thankfulness....

:: Chickies roaming free. Again. Moments of silence. Piles of freshly folded laundry. Stooping it on my steps and watching life go by.

:: Tadpoles releases to their freedom. Tank refilled with frogs. The summer cycle of collections and release. Eager anticipation of baby chicks.

:: Table centerpieces handpicked by little hands. Gifts of love - spontaneous and unprompted. My favorite kind of flower gift.

:: Mother's Day celebrated in my small world - sweet cards, pancakes, and eggs. Olive Garden supper. and "You're so beautiful, Mama."

:: New life to bring to my gardens. Rainy days to grow our plants. My garden spot tilled...and waiting. Lew - my scout of poison ivy. Warm bread for lunch. And Mom's jam.

:: Brothers who beg to share the same bed. Peals of laughter behind closed doors. Sweet big brothers. Trusting little ones.

:: The Day's first cup. A journal to help me remember. My alarm clock - open windows-sunshine-and bird song. Sleepy bedheads. Rumpled p.j.s. Cozy cuddles. His - "I'm going to kiss you every morning."

:: Warm spring days. Sunset swing rides, Imaginations running wild, BOYS running so wild they are blurry. Boys in bare feet. Grass stained toes. Big backyards. Butterflies - signs of summer.

:: Sunset Cribbage (and crushing) on the deck. Rematches and one point wins. Both going to bed satisfied! A porch riddled with the day's wet wellies and drenched, filthy jeans.

:: Big Daddy Salamanders. And Daddy's who take the time to find a container and bring them home to their 3 little boys. Another school year almost complete. A week up home. My sweet home church. Friendships - young and older - much deeper now. Ontario coffee - the very BEST! Babies come home. Bagels with friends. Honesty and vulnerability.... (#2861-#2917 - My Joy Journey)

These Past Few Days...

We just spent this past week up in my neck of the woods doing what we love to do -- sharing our hearts with people and sitting down with them - listening to them share their hearts with us.

It was one of my favorite times of "ministry" so far. I say ministry very loosely, because I really believe that all of life - every day should be ministry within our own little spheres of influence and responsibility. I don't really believe in separating life from ministry anymore. It's all connected to me. Nor do I believe that only a select few "do" ministry while the rest of God's kids just live life. While maybe only pastor's and missionaries get paid for their service....if God is living in us, and if He possessed all of the spiritual gifts, then chances are really good that He's given us a few of those gifts, and He's wanting to live out some of those gifts THROUGH us.

For example...my Dad teaches at a secular school, he drives bus, and is the town's Fire Chief as well as their Animal Control Officer. He does only "secular" work by the world's standards, but that man "does ministry" just as much as any pastor or missionary that I know. He is discipling new believers, he is a major support system to his church pastor and all who go there, the entire town knows and respects him, and he is constantly doing things behind the scenes - dropping off a load of wood to a struggling family down the road, buying a pizza for a little family that doesn't get treats very often, and sitting down in people's homes - getting to know them and loving on them in tangible, honest to goodness ways that make people love him and want to be like him. He LOVES Jesus, and all of his little town knows this because of his love for them. We ALL "do" ministry if we love Jesus and let Him live life through us. "They will know we are Christians by our love,......right?"

Okay. So, having said all of that...this past week was one of my favorite times of "ministry", so far. :0) We were up at my old church where I spent all of my growing up years, and we were with MY people, so before we even went into this week, I was totally invested. I love my roots. I love my people. I love the culture that I grew up in. It really is completely different than from where we live now - just two hours south. Two bitty hours. Two different worlds. And, so while it was a week that I was most looking forward to - I also went into it with a little bit of fear and trepidation...and with my eyes wide open -- knowing full well "my kind of people." Fiercely independent. Maybe slightly suspicious of new ideas. And not overly quick to spill out their emotions for all the world to see. I can say these things...because I'm one of them.

But, oh my goodness -- it was such a time of blessing for Kev and I. The service that we bring to people is one that was offered to us while we were living in PA, and it was really kind of life changing for us. In offering assessments and teaching tools and in hours spent together both as teams and individuals, we try to help others clarify and define their God given gifts and talents, and help them as individuals bring all of who they are into unified teams that better radiate Christ to others. Often times we don't even see how Jesus is already living and operating through us until a fresh pair of eyes brings it to light. Our time up there was so awesome and so mutually encouraging. We were welcomed into people's homes, we had honest depth in conversation, people trusted us with their hearts, and we in turn trusted them with ours.

And like so much of life lived up there, we just walked into people's lives, they loved us for who we are, and we were able to live life with them for just a few short hours. We were fed delicious meals, offered some of the most amazing coffee we've ever had in our lives, and I even got to give a bottle to a sweet newborn calf...and we went home with some of the Mama's milk to boot! Now that's hospitality!

A Day Late.

We've been up in God's Country for the past seven days. And although we left to come back home the day before Mother's Day, Mom and I were able to sneak away for an afternoon and play the way that she and I do so love to play...

We both have quite a fancy for Chinese food, so we love to sneak away and eat ourselves sick at the local little joint in town...often followed by a ginormous milkshake at the Dairy Bar next door...often followed by much moaning and groaning about how horribly sick we feel. Good clean fun.

And THEN we love to poke around at all of the little antiquey/vintage funk shops that all of our boys get bored to tears walking around in. This is the little gifty gift that I bought for Marmie as part of her Mom's Day gift...

...And old lard can. I'm awesome like that. But she's been looking for that exact can for months, so she was thrilled beyond measure. We are simple folk - it doesn't take much, I guess.

And this is the sweet little sign that she bought for me...although I am obviously NOT her mother. She can't handle me getting something for her without her reciprocating. She's a stinker. But I really REALLY love this sweet little plaque, and I have it hanging in my living room as a daily reminder. Pretty rockin' rules to live by, methinks. So, Marmie Dearest, Happy Mother's Day. An although you won't read this for days because you won't let Dad teach you how to work the computer, and although Dad may not get around to reading my blog for days because he has to work and drive bus and be a fireman and be the animal control officer...I want the world to know how much I love you. You ARE the best. You are my standard. You gave me the BEST childhood and the greatest memories. You have prayed me through my life, and you continue to do so every day. The longer that I am a mother the more I see and know what you have given and sacrificed for us kids. The more I understand your love. And the more I want to strive to be a better Mama to my three boys. Thank you for your love. Thank you for our life. Thank you for being you. Thanks for being my mother and my friend both. You totally and completely rock. Hardcore. I love you. SO very much...

Little Loves....

Catching up on my joy journey...A list of thankfulness

Family road trips, a week in Pennsylvania, re-connecting with loved ones, reflecting on where we have been and where we are going, Bacton Hill Bible Church, singing with the worship team - one last time, pizza - five times in one week - delish., Rita's water ice...summer's BEST treat, ten hour drives, three little boys cramped in back, Jesse's incessant chatter - the entire drive home, his hand in mine - living life together... Date nights with friends - footloose and fancy free, Tim Hortens - college girls - and Jesus, listening and learning, The Hunger Games. I liked it. Not gonna lie...

Twin baby boys in all of their deliciousness, Rockin' Mama of FIVE!!!, and a snatch of a visit with sweet conversation. Playing "the purse game" with another Mama of boys, swim lessons and giant leaps of courage, baby girls one day a week, and pretending to be a "Mama of four." Whew.

Successful school days, school days of throwing in the towel, coffee and Cribbage - with Lew, Kevy, and Shandra, sloooowly learning to "never say never," tents in the basement, blueberry pie.

McDonalds and Great Grammy, movies in bed, exercising, and NOT, thrift store flip flops, iced caramel macchiattos (or however you spell that), family bedtime prayers, bunkbeds shared, the day's wounds healed, mess upon mess upon mess upon mess....

smothered in kisses from four sweet loves, the smell of freshly mown grass, crazy full moons, eager anticipation of little baby chicks, flowers planted from sweet friends, flowers picked and replanted from sweet husbands, weeks up at Grammy's....

Afternoons with Mom, four-wheeling with boys, cousins who are best friends, waking to the smell of fresh coffee, my old home church, phone calls from co-workers, conversations at work...

Mom's home cooked food, late night t.v. shows, little boys crawling in under the sheets, frogging and fishing, rides on the wagon, bike rides down the old dirt road, no black flies yet...

Late night chats with Mom and Dad, their lifelong committment, love still in their eyes, his teasing - her banter, still kissing in the kitchen, my boys looking on...

Tight family ties, memories made, sweet simple pleasures, fires in the yard, sleepovers in the cabin, slow pace of life....

It's the joy of the small that makes life large....... (#2776-2860)

Life With My Boys...

The boys are up at crack of dawn -- They want to get their fishing on.

The worms are dug, and they're all fed -- All this before I'm out of bed.

Hoodies, wellies, hats to boot! -- I should have worn my big snowsuit.

For boys, the cold is no big deal, as long as fishies they can reel -- For me, the spa shall have to wait, for a "girls night out" hot date...

A redneck date today shall be -- With my four guys, the fish, and Me.

2761. Kevin's big ideas. 2762. Infectious enthusiasm. 2763. Warm hoodies. 2764. Dry wellies. 2765. Three pickerel. 2766. Grampy's boat. 2767. Gummy worms & night crawlers. 2768. Ransom on my lap to keep me cozy. 2769. Kevy almost falling in. 2770. Dunkin Donuts on the way home. 2771. HOT showers. 2772. Three (make that FOUR) happy boys. 2773. Redneck fun in the country. 2774. Love tanks filled. 2775. HOME again!

I Said I'd Never...

Once upon a time, a long time ago, I said I wasn't going to have kids.

I said I didn't like them, and they always cried when I held them. I was super uncomfortable around them. They made me wicked nervous. And if I was ever given the choice between holding a kitten or a baby, hands down I would without fail always, always, always choose the kitten. But then I had one...and two more after that. And I actually, really kind of like them. So, then I said: "Well, if I ever DO have children, then I will never EVER homeschool them." "Homeschoolers are whack jobs," said I, "and it will never EVER happen."

But, then somehow, that happened too, and for at least this chapter of our story, I actually kind of like it. And then one time I said, I will never get my kids any of "those big, ugly plastic toys that just clutter up the frontyard." And guess what Ransom got for his birthday last year? Guess who picked it out?

I also said because my childhood was so traumatized by garden weeding scars (just joking, Ma) that I would die before I ever actually chose to plant a garden of my own...and voluntarily weed it no less. Here's to year #3...

I said my kids would only play with one toy at a time before putting it neatly and perfectly away - back in its exact location - before getting out another toy to play with. And all of their toys would preferably be hand-made and wooden. But then I had a Jesse. And creativity flourishes best in mixing and matching...and messing. And when a trashed room equals two hours of quiet, I'm cool with the trade off. So there you have it.

I said my kids would eat their snacks only at the table. But then friends come over, and it's more fun to have picnics on the floor, and I'm learning not to be so uptight. So, there you have it. Food on the floor. It happens.

I said I'd never wear fake fur...and I made fun of the people who did. But then my friend bought me this crazy gift that I really love and actually stay warm in. So there you have it. I now wear fur...with only the tiniest bit of laughing when I wear the hood...

I said my children would never wear light up shoes. But then Grammy found these at our local transfer station, and Ransom thinks they're the rockinest things in the world. So there you have it. The shoes shall stay.

I said I'd never wear nylons again after Bible School. I did twice. I said my kids would never own video games. Kaden earned a DS. I said I'd never buy a bed on a yardsale. Our $20 mattress is so cozy. I said I'd never feed my kids hotdogs. I said I'd never eat calamari. I said my children would eat their meals with proper decorum and manners - they would NOT be hooligans. (So, I made this mealtime reminder of all the things we struggle with. Then Kevin said he didn't want a Natzi wife. So, I took the sign back down again...We're back to being hooligans).

And I said I was giving up coffee.

Moral of this here story? Don't listen to a word that I say... This girl needs her coffee.

Something from Nothing.

Up until naptime yesterday, we had ourselves the makings for a "terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day" recipe in the works around here. Nothing overly epic or awful - just a whole lot of little things that were "off" and were quickly compiling together like a ticking time bomb - just waiting for an explosion...most likely from the Mama. For whatever reason, Ransom had a rough night the night before, and then he was up for the day at crack of dark-thirty, so both of us were bleary-eyed and whiney all day. The two big boys still aren't rested and completely back on par from being away for a week, and we have had a few really late nights in a row around here. All of those things just sort of culminated together yesterday, and by 10:30 in the morning, I just cut my losses, willingly admitted defeat, and threw all of my day's strategy and agenda to the wind. The two oldest ran wild and free outside, I drank an entire pot of coffee, Ransom and I read some stories, we had toast for lunch, and all were down for naps by noon.

We survived...just barely by the hairs of our chinny chin chins. And today we shall start afresh and anew...equally bleary-eyed, but maybe just a little bit less whiney. That's my goal, anyway.

I asked Kev this morning at breakfast if he ever has days where he just feels aimless. It's not that I don't have anything that needs to be done around here - it's just that I don't feel like doing any of them. You know, things like feeding my children, doing that mountain of laundry, taking a shower, whipping out the math books, or planting my garden. I'd rather just sit right here on my rump, have another cup of joe, and read about all of the exciting things that the rest of the world is doing - thus sinking myself even further into the state of apathy and slothfulness that I am already feeling... And then I remember that He must increase, and I must decrease. He wants my knees bent far more than He wants my lists completed. He fills the common days just as full as the newsy dramatic. And joy is found in the acquiesing - in the emptying of my will to His own.

I once read a quote that said: "True greatness is found in helping others who can do nothing for you in return." Hmn. That sounds an awful lot like motherhood, doesn't it? The feeding, the bathing, the cleaning, the laundering, - the perpetual bringing order from chaos. This "ministry of the mundane" is the ministry of motherhood. And we are not the first to have emptied ourselves. We have the footsteps of the Ultimate Parent to follow. And today I am thankful for this truth: "God created the world out of nothing, and as long as we are nothing, He can make something out of us." ~ Martin Luther.

You go, Martin. Rock on, brother.

Settling In...

After a week on the road for our missions' staff retreat in beautiful Pennsylvania, we are HOME and settling back into our pace of life as we know it here. Two times a year the East coast staff with U.S. Center for World Mission gets together to reconnect, encourage, cast vision, and just be together for a few days. It's a really nice time of refreshment, mutual encouragement, and a really fabulous balance of both work and play! We were the only family there with young children, so we would go to some of the meetings - fully decked out with school, books, legos, trucks, and crayons; and then, when the natives got a little restless, the littles and I went back to our room and played, or just explored the retreat center until everyone broke for lunch or supper. It was a pretty sweet deal.

There are SO many things that we love about Pennsylvania. This was our home away from home for three years, after all; and Jesse is our little PA souvinir that we brought back home with us! We were able to see a couple of friends from Philadelphia Biblical University, we explored some of our old haunts, and we spent the week-end with our church family where Kev led worship for three years. I tell you what - that just put the wind back into our sails and totally encouraged us in SO many ways. That chapter of our lives has God's grace written all over it. Not that every chapter doesn't have His grace woven in and throughout...but that three year season in Philly - (after my initial grieving of the total uproot and major move away from home, family, friends and life as I knew it, along with being a brand new Mama was dealt with) - just totally and completely turned out to be an awesome chapter of rest and growth. And it was a time for me where God truly proved Himself faithful on so many levels.

We were brand new parents, and we had just moved away from both sets of family, from awesome friends, from a totally supportive and loving home church, from my very first HoMe, and from the country --- to the city where I knew no-one, to a brand new church that was a totally different culture for me, and to a University where we were the only ones pushing a stroller during Freshman orientation. I was a fish out of water, and the entire packing time up to the move, I was stressed, sad, and worried. My parents built their first home, had all their babies there, and fully intend to grow old and die in that home...and I guess I had always assumed that I would do the same. In my book, we had the perfect life. Sweet little house in the country, sweet little baby, we were close to both sets of parents, and we had sweet jobs - Kev as Youth pastor and me as a part-time teacher at a local Christian school. As far as I was concerned, my future was mapped out.

So this move - this true leaving and cleaving and following my husband and the Lord was a total and complete testing of my faith, and really - for the first time in my life it was a time when I saw the Lord provide for me and prove Himself faithful exceedingly and abundantly above and beyond all I could have ever asked for or imagined. Some dear friends made a weekend roadtrip with us before the actual move for a complete apartment overhaul. We ripped up old carpets, sanded and urethaned wooden floors, painted every wall, and totally set everything up, so that we when walked through the doors the first night of our move, I was honestly happy and it already felt like home because of the work that had already been done previous. Our first year there, several young couples moved into the complex and for our entire time as students we lived glorified dorm life - married style - where we all had babies together, grilled in our backyard, and went on week-end adventures all over the place together. Our new church welcomed us with open arms and showed us unconditional love and support. They threw me a ginormous baby shower for Jesse, and they surrounded us with love and support when he burnt his hands and had to have skin graft surgery. And we made some of the best friends of our lives -many with whom we still stay in contact.

Over and over, time and again - God filled in the gaps for me. He proved Himself faithful, and those three years have changed me. I love my home and my life here. I am perfectly content with my little world, my job, my neighbors, my friends, my ministry, my chickens, and my garden. But I have the heart of a nomad now. If God asked me to, I could give this up - because friends and family are forever, anyway - and everything else is just details. So because of these lessons learned in my life, and because of that season of grace and growth, Pennsylvania will be forever dear to my heart, and it will always be a home away from home for our little family.