16 Days.

* Written in the wee wee hours of yesterday morning...  Hence the incoherence and blank stares that I've given to anyone I have chatted with today.  My apologies.

Our two-day yard sale is done and over with.
My yard is a mess, my house looks like a cyclone hit, and I've been living on caffeine...but it. is. finished.

And it was a smashing success.
Between the lot of us - and despite my perpetually giving stuff away so that it wouldn't return into my home....AND despite the brothers selling things back and forth amongst themselves... over $750 was made! Woot!  A ginormous trailer load of stuff is headed to the transfer station, and only two boxes (2! boxes!) are returning back into my home.

Success.
Smashing.

And now that leaves us with sixteen days.

Sixteen days to pack up my home, clean it from top to bottom, paint my new apartment, strip wallpaper from one of the bedrooms and then paint it, clean said apartment, and then make it feel as much like a new HOME as I can...

Throw in six waittressing shifts and four wee kidlets...and we're golden.
We've got this.
Just keep swimming.

As I write this, it's 2:00a.m., and I've been trying to sleep since 10:00.  Mayhap it has something to do with that 7:00 p.m. push-through-the-yard-sale-clean-up cup of coffee that was consumed.  Plus, the two biggest Hoolies are tenting outside, so we have our A.C. turned off upstairs so that we can hear if any weirdos creep into our backyard where Kev would have to go all Rambo on them.  Because of this, it's entirely too roasty toasty upstairs for me, and I cannot get to sleep to save my soul.

Plus, I had to have my first cry.

You know, the one that's like:  "Holy crap.  We're really and truly doing this."
We are selling our house and we are slamming the book shut on this chapter of our lives.
We are moving on into uncharted territory....and it's big...and it's change...
And it all has to be done in sixteen days.
It just kind of slayed me all at once.

Kevy knew I was restless, and he knew I wasn't sleeping...
He said he also knew that this was coming.
All it took was a:  "Honey, I know that you're giving up a lot"...and the floodgates opened.

Because although sixteen days to do all that I need to do feels entirely too daunting and completely overwhelming at the moment...I know that it will all get done.  It always does.  What feels bigger to me than all of this right now is the fact that I have only sixteen days to begin to walk away from this sweet four year chapter of my life.  This chapter that was so "me" in so many ways...with my ginormous garden, and my big sprawling yard...my kitchen wherein I practically lived...and my sweet neighbor Lew.  This place where I have lived the longest and where I brought two babies HOME.  This 2 acre lot - where out of all the places that we have ever actually called home - being the first where I really and truly felt it...

1 of 3 batches of bread and butter from my garden.  I am happy.  With three Hoolie samples.

So, that just feels a little daunting, as well.

But, it's all been a gift, and I view it as such.
This world is not HOME, and we're just passing through.
It's just "stuff" and things...I know this.

And I honestly am excited for the next chapter.
I'm excited for the adventure of what is to come next.
I feel beyond safe and secure in taking this next step with the man whom I love.
I love paring down.  I love living simply.

We be jammin.' 5 batches worth.  At least 5 more to go...during a more sane season of my life.

And I really and truly adore the concept of getting out of debt.
When do you ever get the chance to live somewhere rent free for a season?
 In a huge house?
With dear, dear friends?
On a 48 acre lot?
With a road that dead-ends on a lake?

We are martyrs, by no means....

I turned 36 last week.  The boys gave me "my" favorite candy.  And a birthday cucumber.
Kevy gave me running sneaks and 10 hours of painting.

And as we leave this sweet spot filled with four years of love, I am full.
I am thankful, and I leave this chapter feeling beyond blessed.

Happy to have been given a forever friend in Lew.
Happy to have learned his gardening wisdom ...and Cribbage.
Thankful for such a sweet spot to bring two of my babies home from the hospital.
For the crickets and the tree frogs...
For the first time ever being able to have chickens roam free.
For a man who I would follow to the Ends of the earth and back again...
Who I would do absolutely anything for...because He would do the same for me.
For him not caring a whipstitch about painting...but for knowing it's important to me...
And for four little Loves willing, ready, and excited for adventures awaiting.
For three final batches of pickles...
And for corn on the cob.
And for Grammy's taking our kitties...

And as we move ahead, I am thankful to walk with deep, soul friends.
For forests with no poison ivy.
And for chances to grow.
I'm thankful that although we are "in town," it's actually more country than here...
For bringing our chickies right along with us...
And for a few months of respite.
For a chance to step away from the rat race for awhile, to say "no" to that crazy...
To slow down and to simplify...and to reassess life.

It's good.
It's all so very good.

And grieving is good too.
It's okay to be sad.
It's a necessary step in the journey..for closure...and to give permission to move ahead for what's new.

And so, with this chapter closing and a brand new one upon us...
Although overwhelmed, I am thankful...
And although sad, I'm content.
I turn the page nervous but excited...with equal parts sadness and relief...trepidation and excitement.

And with the words of that wise old sage ringing in my ears:
"Don't cry that it's over....Smile because it happened." ~ Dr. Seuss
I shall try, Dr. Seuss.  I shall try.

And now sleep woos me back...with that man breathing softly...
And His mercies are new every morning...

Perspective is a powerful thing...
"I lean into the river, baptized again.  It's current it takes me."

Today...

Today, we were supposed to have our giant yard sale.
Today, the house was supposed to be completely culled and sorted...organized and rooted through.
That's what we've been working toward all week long.
It's the next step in this whole moving process....

But today, I am a Mama frazzled.
And he is a Hubby tired.
And they are our babies full of grace...but with love tanks just a week bit depleted....

And so Today....
Instead of the whirling and swirling...and instead of the rushing and running...
Instead of hitting the floor running, bringing boxes up from the basement, and pressing the accelerator even harder...

2 sets of fat little feet....1 set wherein Daddy isn't sure what he thinks of being painted.  ha.  It begins...

Today, we are saying no to the crazy.
And we are walking away.  Just for the day.
It'll all still be here when we get back...but we will all be the better for having walked away.

It was Kev's idea.
He's got a better finger on the pulse of our family.
I tend to just "push through" until said goal is met...no matter the chaos or the casualties...
He knows better how to re-calibrate...us.  All of us.

And so they stumble out of bed...one by one...with bedheads adorable and love tanks refilling...
We sit and we slow down.
They watch cartoons, and we sip our coffee...
He and I will play some Cribbage and we'll re-connect from the long week previous...
Whenever we feel like it, we'll all hop into the car and we'll kick it for the day...
And we'll drive south from all the crazy.

We make our own agenda...and we can choose to be slaves to it...or we can make it work for us, instead...
Today will make me better.
It'll make me a better Mama...and a better friend.  It'll make me see my husband...and it'll restore my balance.

Today is good.

So...We Have An Announcement.

Like....literally.
We have one.  Finally.

And so, without further adooooo.....
We are pleased and proud to announce the birth of our fourth child....a wee baby girl.
Who is now *cough* 3 months old.  Ahem.

Poor child #4...

Kudos to my sweet cousin Trina, who came over to the house when London was just a week old exactly, and who was oh so patient and loving with this new baby.  She took so. many. pictures.  And she was so sweet and professional.  And I am just so pleased with the results.  I hate taking my kids anywhere to get their pictures taken.  It's kind of like the bane of my existence...like right up there with being tortured, in my book.  But someone coming to my home?  And a family member at that?  Yes, please....

 If you can't read the inscription on her announcement it says:

"London Faith Booker came into our lives at 6:44 a.m., on May 9, 2013.  She weighed 8 pounds, 1 ounce and was 21 inches long.  Daddy, Mama, Kaden, Jesse, and Ransom joyfully welcome our sweet baby girl with deep gratitude and with great love."

Oh yes we do, Baby Love.
We do, indeed...

Cat napper by day, but sleeper-through-the-night, she is a whole lot of delicious wrapped up in a delightful little package of "chill." This baby girl is so happy and so content...and she puts up with a whoooole lot 'o love from her brothers.

Mad coping skillz, she has.

And during this season of "crazy," where I am back at work a few shifts each week, and where we are purging our home from top to bottom to get ready for our yardsale and our big move in just a couple of weeks...I am so very thankful for a wee little baby who makes me literally stop and sit every few hours...

We sit.  We slow.  We nurse.
And we find that sacred amidst all of the crazy chaos.
And each and every time life rights itself again....

A Date.

Behold.
God's Country.
Otherwise known as the place of my birth.
Also known as "The County."
Open fields.  Rolling hills.  Lots of trails.  And potatoes.
Lots of potatoes.

The three Hoolie boys have been up at my Mama's and Daddy-O's for this past week.

It's a summer tradition where they spend a week up there just for fun...and for getting spoiled rotten.  All things involving:  four-wheeling, treats, staying up late, swimming, bonfires, coon catching, fishing expeditions, movies, stories, sleeping in the camp, adventure expeditions, and the like.

It's a week that my parents look forward to all summer and one that my boys do as well.
Aaaaand....one that this Mama does, also.
My, this past week the silence was deafening!!

Finding frogs.

So, Friday after work we traipsed ourselves up to collect our packages.  And to spend the rest of the weekend up there visiting, as well.  On Saturday afternoon whilst my Mama was snuggling with London, and whilst the two smaller Hoolies were taking a nap, Kaden and I went on a two-hour four wheeling date just the two of us.

I love one on one time with my boys.  It is delightful.
And I had missed him.

Lots of rain.  Lots of washouts.  Kaden's making sure it's not too deep.

So, on this particular date, Kaden did the driving and I just sat back and let him take me wherever his little heart desired.  Which involved water and puddles.  Always.  And counting the number of frogs that we found swimming in the puddles.  I believe, by the end of our date we were upwards of forty frogs....along with a dead crow and a partridge.

Very eventful.

 Four wheeling rides also involve digging around in Grampy's saddlbags to see what sorts of treats and snacks we can find.  This time, our options were:  sardines, kippered snacks, or vienna sausages.  Kaden had never had these mechanically separated chicken parts that are all smashed together in the name of a sausage before.

And he found them to be quite delightful.
Right up there with Spam.

 So, we had ourselves a little snack, we did a little wading and a little catching of some froggies...
And then, we headed home.

I love four-wheeling.
It's one of the joys of my life.
Seriously, it is.
I don't know why, but it just makes me really, really happy.

But, before we got home, we found ourselves side-tracked by the gravel pit.
My boys love the gravel pit.
They love to climb it and slide down it.
They pretty much love anything that makes them grubby.

And because we were on a hot date, Kaden convinced me to climb the walls, as well.
This was our view below:

We also drove through all of those puddles as fast as we could.
Well, Kaden did.  I just hung on.  And prayed.

I find that when I go up home for just a few days, I need to pack just as many clothes as I would normally need to for an entire week.  I am perpetually filthy.  Or wet.  Or smelling like fire.

 It was a lovely date and a lovely afternoon with my sweet, biggest boy.

And now a shout out to the shoes in my life:

As a Mama to (mostly) boys, my summer footwear consists solely of keen's and chacos.  Both shoes being quite pricey when purchased brand new, but oh-so-fabulous when purchased at a yard sale or GoodWill.  These babies cost me $7.99, and in the course of that two hour date, they were soaked from mud, soaked from puddles, and filled to the brim with gravel pit dirt.  They were then sufficiently washed off by the puddles on the way home, and set in the sun to dry.  Voila!  They can also be thrown in the washing machine with any load of laundry....which happens to these babies all. summer.  long.

I heart them.

Journey.

We sold our house yesterday.

To a little couple who is getting married in August and who fell in love with it just like we did four years ago. It comes with four years of memories by a family in love, a fully planted garden....and about 4 dozen eggs hidden somewhere, as my wee chicky bitties have decided to forego their laying in the coop.

So, here's to another chapter...

The Lord has certainly been growing me these past few years of my life...
There was a time when...
I said I would never be a pastor's wife.  Check.
I said I would never raise support.  Check.
And I said I would never live with friends for fear of messing with a good thing.  Welp...as of September 3rd...Check.

This is what we have left of the girls.  A foxy loxy got one this morning.  Poophead.

I've also heard it said that the three potentially biggest stressors in a person's life are:
Having a new baby.  Check.
Moving to a new location.  Check.
And starting a new job.  This week I started back to waitressing.  Again.  Check.
It will also be my first fall of homeschooling two students...with a brand new baby on the side...

Oooh Lawdy...

She wasn't the brightest of the bunch.  But, she was the prettiest.

But surprisingly, I have peace.
Which is saying a lot, coming from someone who supremely despises change.
I'm learning to extend much grace to myself and to others.
And I'm learning that it's possible to simultaneously grieve the closing of one chapter and be excited about the next steps of another.

And a new chapter is indeed upon us.

One that involves stepping away from the rat race of life for awhile to regroup and figure out next steps.
One involving working toward paying off student loans and becoming debt free.
One that involves courage in stepping into the unknown and into a new season.
One involving community and living with and amongst friends - sharing in the messy and the mundane.
And one that involves letting others live life with us and walking alongside.  A vulnerable way to live, indeed.

We will be moving into the upstairs of a huge house on the outskirts of town...with friends who are already living there.  We will be living and learning together...sharing spaces, and siblings.  Kitchens and countertops.  And 40+ acres of woodland to roam for two couples, 5 boys, and one bitty girl..

Living life and sharing....

Hearts and hurts.
The messy and the mundane.
The chaos and the crazy.
Being vulnerable.
Speaking truth.
And extending grace.

Are we crazy - we two families?  Maybe.
Our individualistic culture surely doesn't know much about living in community together.

Am I nervous about potentially hurting relationships in living this close together?  Sure.
But where there is risk, there is also potential for something awesome to take place.

And so we move forward.
With cautious baby steps, we walk...
Trying to hear God...trying to walk where He says to walk.
Open to what He has for us...and willing to never say "Never".....

With hearts and hands wide open.
Holding loosely.
Freely giving back the gifts that were given by the Gift-giver, Himself, in the first place.
And humbly accepting the new ones...

And trusting.
Always trusting.

~ For stretching, and for growing.
~ For listening, and for learning.
~ For a husband worth following.
~ For choosing courage.
~ For a house of memories.
~ For two babies brought home there.
~ For the new couple moving in.  And for the start of their own memories.
~ For boys willing to follow their Daddy and their Mama.
~ For excitement that is catching.
~ For salamanders.  And for frogs.  For adventures.  And for fun.  There as well...
~ For brother friends...and for learning to mesh more personalities.
~ For grace for the Mamas...
~ For new paint and new chapters.
~ For saying "no" to the rat race...and "yes" to things more important.
~ For opportunities to say good-bye to student loans.
~ For new doors able to be pushed wide open.
~ For friendships real and raw.
~ And for walking alongside...

My Joy Journey...

Sunset Rock, Lucerne.  One of my happy places....

"Don't cry because it's over...Smile because it happened." ~ Dr. Seuss.

Fact or Fiction?

Here's a story:

Long ago in the days of yester-year when we were still just "best buddies," my hubby and I were camp counselors.  He worked on the boy's side of camp, and I worked on the girl's side.  He had grown up at summer camp - both being a camper and a counselor, whilst I myself had only been a trouble-making camper for all of my Junior High and High School years.

And the thoughts of being a counselor to 10-15 new little girls each and every week had me in tears almost every weekend.  Seriously, it did.  The whole concept of "camp counselor" was kind of panicky to me.  (Remember also...way back in the days of yester-year, I was quite certain that I would never be a Mama to any pukey, poopy ankle biter of my own....  Kids weren't really "my thing.")

Whoops.  This picture should actually come after the next one...

But, by Saturday morning when all of those little girls were reunited with their families, I was always so sad to see them go.
By Sunday, I was stressing that a brand new week was upon me.
By Monday, I was freaking out about the new set of rugrats I was going to be taking care of.
And again, by Saturday I was sad to see them go.

Wash, rinse, repeat.
For all the live long summer.
I think it's change.  I don't do well with change.

Anyway...

At this particular camp, one of the jobs for us counselors to do throughout the week was to pick a "skill" that we would teach our kids every day for that week.  There were all kinds of activities for them to choose from:  horseback riding, bb guns, swimming, crafts, canoeing, sailing, hiking, wilderness survival etc...

I find it absolutely hilarious that Kev taught sailboating (is that even a word?) and horseback riding for two of his activities.  Never in my life have I known him to navigate a sailboat or to ride a horse...but he taught those activities...and he taught them well.  A fabulous friend and I found ourselves to be new together at the camp this particular summer, and before we knew it, all of the cool activities and all of the activities that could be spent outside working on an awesome tan got scooped up by the more "seasoned" counselors who knew what they would be in for during their summer working there.

We found ourselves stuck with teaching Wilderness Survival.  That's right.
Wilderness Women we were.
I find that hilarious, too.

And you could surely pick us out in a crowd.  Whilst all of the other counselors were tanned golden bronze from the sun, we were still white from being in the woods all day.  And bug bitten.  From being in the woods all day.  I was only minorly (is that even a word, also?) jealous by all of this...after all, I had a "best buddy" to impress....

And might I also add that I knew nothing about teaching Wilderness Survival?
Minor detail....

But, my Daddy-O on the other hand, knows a lot.  So, on one of our week-ends off, I blitzed myself up home and got me a crash course on the whole topic and some supplies.  He gave me a handy-dandy supply kit of first aid material...and we taught a little bit of that...including how to make a homemade sling with your bra.  Hey, one gots to survive....  And we learned how to make shelters.  We learned about what plants were edible and what were not.  We made "cowboy bread" over an open fire.  We learned how to make one match fires.  And we also learned about a wasp's nest that was buried nearby... and we got really fast at running through those woods back to camp as fast as our little legs could carry us.

By summer's end, we had developed quite a name for ourselves, and our activity actually became pretty popular.  I think mostly, because we ate a lot...but we two "Wilderness Women" were quite proud of ourselves and we developed a friendship that has lasted to this day.  Katie made that summer fun for me, and I will be forever grateful to her for that.

Meanwhile, back at the boys' side of camp, Kev was teaching his kidlets that if you flip your canoe out in the middle of the lake, it is possible for you to turn it upright and get back in again and row back to camp....

And to prove that this is indeed possible, he and my brother "showed us" while we were in Rangeley.....
Hmmm.

You be the judge....