An Ode. (to whom..I'm not quite sure)

Three boys in their bedheads ~
sitting on the couch.
Mama in her jammies ~
feeling like a grouch.

Haven't drank my coffee ~
now it's gotten cold.
Heat it for the fifth time ~
wow - that's nasty old...

Chicky eggs for breakfast ~
full of protein power.
Make my tummy happy ~
these I will devour.

Got to get my groove on ~
need to start my day.
Laundry - always whirring ~
boys are LOUD at play.

Have to start some school soon ~
reading, writing, math.
Jesse and his "artwork" ~
always make me laugh.

Aaaaand.  Sha-zam!  

Time to make some popcorn ~
'tis a midday snack.
Some salty and some sweetness ~
make my lips go "smack."          (sorry...kind of lame).

London Faith is growing ~
she makes me big and round.
People say I'm showing ~
SO much more this time around.

In practicing our adverbs ~
Kade pronounced me "hugely" large.
His other two wee siblings ~
joined the chant with quite a charge.

Kevin called me "Barney" ~
in my purple shirt today.
In his supper, I'll hide "hot sauce....."
that will teach them, won't you say?

Don't mess with preggo Mamas ~
when they're fifteen poundsies larger.
You might regret the outcome ~
better let ME be in charge......(er).

I need more than half the bed now ~
let me throw this leg on you.
What? I'm squishing?  You can't breathe, Love?
Speak up, Kev....I can't hear you!!!

Oh?  You didn't sleep good last night?
Was it the crunching of my Tums?
Or - those 15 times I went pee?
Midnight snacks when I said, "Yum?"

Sorry, Hon.  It won't get better ~
before it gets much worse, I fear.
We have one more (long) trimester ~
before our London does appear.

So, whilst I grow and groan much ~
getting larger every day...
Keep your comments to yourselves, men ~
Careful now - is what I say.

I'm the one who does your laundry ~
irons shirts, and cooks your food...
Best be showing me some love, men ~
or who knows what I will do?

I've got tricks-ies up my sleeves ~
And I have fiesty on the brain.
If you mess with me, I'll get you ~
trust me now, I won't refrain...

You can tease me, you can name call ~
I'll remember, never fear.
And I will always win, you know it ~
Here's your warning.  I've been clear.

For the final weeks of "grow time" ~
As I "glow" and grow this tum...
All I'd better hear is "Yes, dear."
You're so lovely - the BEST Mom!

Oh your beauty - it's astounding!
Growing poundage?  Never knew!
You want lies, you ask?  Believe it!!!
Poured on thickly...like they're true.

This will make our world go smoothly ~
Happy family, we shall be!
When the Mama, she is happy....
All goes well.  Don't you agree?

Hmmm.
Maybe it was more of a "warning" than an "ode...."
Let the records state that the gauntlet has been thrown...

And may the games begin.