A Final Cucumber Post.

I think that the Old Timer's were quite brilliant in their abilities to utilize the veggies in their gardens at every stage of the game. They had recipes for when the veggies were tiny and new, they had recipes for when they were at their best and in their very prime, and they had recipes for when the produce was getting a little large and in charge.

I promise that this is my final cucumber/pickle/relish post, but this last recipe for hotdog and hamburger relish is what my Grammy and Marmie would always make as the cucumbers were nearing the end of their production. This recipe is also perfect for when you go away for several days without checking your garden, and upon your return you realize that it has once again gone gangbusters, the cucumbers totally got away from you, and they're all just a little too big for salads or pickles.

So, here's what you'll need:
14 ginormous cukes (or 28 medium sized ones...or however many you want to use, really)
10 large onions (or 20 small sized ones)

Peel cukes. Cut lengthwise. Scrape out seeds.
Coarsely pulse through food processor.
Do the same with the onions.
Pour 1/2 cup pickling salt over everything. Give it a little stir.

Let sit overnight.

Praise Jesus.
The rest of the mess is flung far and wide all over my floor.

I have two coolers because I did two double batches.
You only need one if you're going to just make this recipe as it is.

In the morning, drain your cukes and onions in a colander.
Do not rinse.

In a heavy pan (under a wire), heat 4 cups cider vinegar.
In a separate pan, whisk together 2 more cups cider vinegar with 1 cup flour.
Add to the vinegar/flour mixture:
7 cups packed brown sugar (I am fully aware these recipes are not overly healthy).
4 Tablespoons tumeric
1 teaspoon ginger
1/4 teaspoon black pepper

Mix this all up and add it to the hot vinegar on the stove.
Boil slowly for 5 minutes while stirring steadily.

Add the cukes and the onion.
Bring to a boil again slowly. Do not burn.
Turn down heat.
Boil slowly for 10-12 minutes.
Ladle into hot, sterilized jars and lids.

Voila!
Yeilds 12-17 pints.

Give any and all remaining cucumbers away....